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Charity Matters Inspiration September 17, 2025

Finding the Light

For almost 15 years every Sunday I have sat down to share a few thoughts. Most weeks the words flow from my fingers and I can’t seem to get my thoughts out quick enough. This week the thoughts are slow. The words are few and I’m still processing so much going on in our world as a larger context as well as in my own.

The irony is not lost on me that I wrote a best-selling book Change for Good and yet as I see so much change ahead of me I am scared, excited, nervous and unsure. As I wrote last year, “change always begins with loss.” There is so much loss happening all around me that I struggle to process it all. Those heavy feelings are like walking through mud as you try to make sense of everything. Each step heavy and unsteady because the path is not clear. It is too hard to see and so you trust as you slowly walk each deep and heavy step.

Somehow you believe. You have faith in something bigger. In the kindness of people, in the goodness we show to one another and so you move forward into an unknown place. That faith acts like a flashlight as you navigate a new and unexplored path forward. You have not been this way before. You do not know the way but you have your faith…your flashlight to guide you, to light the way and to bring you from darkness into the light.

When I wrote Change for Good, I never claimed to have all the answers. What I did know then, and what I still know now, is that life guarantees us seasons of change. Sometimes we choose them….like a new job, a marriage, or a move….and sometimes they choose us, whether through loss, illness, or unexpected events. Either way, change asks us to let go of what we know in order to step into what we don’t. That is never easy.

What makes it bearable is the reminder that none of us walks through it alone. In the book, I shared stories of people who took their own moments of heartbreak and used them as a catalyst to create something good. That theme has echoed back to me countless times from readers who wrote to say, “I thought I was the only one.” None of us is the only one. We all walk this muddy road of loss, grief, hope, and renewal. The flashlight we carry……faith, kindness, connection…..is what keeps us going until the ground feels steady again.

Lately, I have been reminding myself of one of the simplest truths I wrote about: kindness heals. When the world feels overwhelming, when the future feels uncertain, when I feel small in the face of so much loss, the antidote is often simple. It is in writing a note to a friend, holding a door open, saying thank you, showing up for someone else. Each small act is a reminder that even in the midst of chaos, we still have power……the power to love, to give, to create light.

That is what Change for Good has always been about. Not grand gestures, not sweeping reform, not changing the whole world at once. It is about the small, intentional acts of love and service that ripple outward in ways we may never see. It is about choosing, over and over again, to believe that our actions matter. That our light matters. That even when the road is muddy and uncertain, we can still place one foot in front of the other.

I know I am not the only one feeling the weight of change right now. Perhaps you are in your own season of transition. Maybe you too are carrying loss, fear, or uncertainty. If so, I want to remind you of what I often need to remind myself: you are not walking this road alone. We are walking it together, carrying our flashlights of faith and kindness, helping each other find the path.

The title Change for Good was always a double meaning. Change can be hard, yes, but it can also be for good….for the better. Good for our growth, good for our healing, good for the world. When we use the change in our lives to serve others, to lift them up, to bring light where there was darkness, we transform not just our own story but the larger story we are all part of.

So as I sit here with my slow words and heavy heart, I remind myself of the truth I wrote and believe: change is never easy, but it is always an invitation. An invitation to trust, to grow, to love, and ultimately to change for good.

And maybe, just maybe, that is enough light for today.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration September 14, 2025

Episode 92: Shoulder Check

In the past fifteen years, I have not resent the same interview twice in one week. However, when I orginally scheduled this to be delivered last Thursday, September 11th I didn’t foresee all that would transpire the day before. The assassination of Charlie Kirk followed by the 24th anniversary of September 11th created so much noise that this very special story might have been missed. So, yes if you are seeing this twice it is intentional because I want you to have a bright light on your Sunday morning. Something to start your week to remind you of all the good in this world. So here you go….once again…

In full disclosure, I know very little about hockey….especially as an LA girl…..but what I do know is that rare and extraordinary group of people who take unimaginable loss and somehow transform it into a mission for good. Today’s guest, Rob Thorsen, is one of those people. After the heartbreaking loss of his son Hayden, Rob chose to honor his memory by spreading kindness and compassion in the most powerful way.

Drawing from Hayden’s love of hockey, Rob used the term “Shoulder Check” not just as a sports reference but as the cornerstone for a movement. What began as a nod to the game has become a beautiful legacy of connection and care. Shoulder Check is about more than hockey…..it’s a mission and a movement about reaching out, checking in, and making contact with those around us. Rob’s story is one of resilience, love, and the reminder that even in the deepest grief, we can create something profoundly good. Take a listen and you will want to be a part of this…

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what ShoulderCheck.ORG does?

Rob Thorsen: ShoulderCheck.org is the first initiative of the HT40 Foundation, which we created to do one simple, specific thing: inspire and enable young people to check in on one another…regularly. We give them the language, tools, and motivation to make “checking in” a daily habit. The culture we’re pushing against is that paradox the U.S. Surgeon General called out in April 2023: we’re hyper-connected by tech, yet lonelier and more isolated than ever. Shoulder Check is our answer.

It started in hockey, our son Hayden played, and the community rallied around us after his death but it quickly became bigger than a sport. The signature gesture is literal: hand on a shoulder, paired with the refrain, “Reach out. Check in. Make contact.” We do this in locker rooms, at center ice, in school assemblies, classrooms, and community events. The goal is behavior change through a simple ritual and a shared brand language…something memorable enough to spread, practical enough to use, and human enough to matter.

Charity Matters: What were your early experiences in PHILANTHROPY?

Rob Thorsen: I didn’t come up through a lifetime of traditional volunteerism; I came out of marketing and advertising. I ran ad agencies. My wife did, too. Ideas, brand-building, behavior change….that’s our professional DNA. After we lost Hayden, I didn’t set out to “become a nonprofit founder.” I set out to develop an idea that could help people the way Hayden helped people….by making contact.

In that sense, Shoulder Check “just happens” to be a nonprofit vehicle. It is, first and foremost, an idea carried by a brand and a toolkit. From day one we treated it like a serious creative brief. Our team (pro bono) built language, design, rituals, and programs the way we would any world-class brand……with clarity, consistency, and heart.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start ShoulderCheck.org?

Rob Thorsen: When Hayden died by suicide in May 2022, our lives were instantly and permanently altered. The first feeling was compulsion: we have to do something. I reached out to a national mental-health nonprofit whose executive director told me, bluntly, “Leave interventions to the professionals.” It stung, but at the same time, it focused me. She was right: I’m not an interventionist. I am a professional in another realm.

A few months later I sketched a simple thought in a notebook: “I have a hand to give. I could use a hand.” That became our north star. We began gathering with 30–70 kids at a time, at home, at the community center and iterating together. We wanted this to be everyone’s idea, not mine. The first crystallized concept to emerge was Shoulder Check: make kindness a contact sport, give everyone a role in the dialogue, and make the ask actionable.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Rob Thorsen: Processing grief and launching a nonprofit at the same time…..there’s no handbook for that. You’re building a startup out of a garage emotionally and literally, while processing the heaviest thing you’ll ever carry. We’re not clinicians. We’re not event producers. Yet we’re running programs and putting on major events because that’s what the idea requires to spread.

Operationally, the work is exhausting….production, follow-up, stakeholder care, constant outreach. Conceptually, the challenge is staying disciplined: we’re not trying to “do everything mental health.” We’re doing one thing well which is equipping friends to check on friends. The saving grace is that the idea is a virtuous circle. The very act of placing a hand on a shoulder….giving or receiving….feeds the work that sustains us.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Rob Thorsen: The stories. Constantly. We hear from people who finally knew how to start a hard conversation and did it……and from people who were struggling and felt their friends show up. Nearly everyone will accept help from a friend; Shoulder Check gives those friends simple language and a moment to step in.

And the ritual itself is its own therapy. When hundreds or thousands of people put hands on shoulders and say “Reach out. Check in. Make contact,” there’s a tangible lift in the room. You feel the possibility of a culture shift……one conversation at a time.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Rob Thorsen: I know it in two ways. First, in the micro: when a young kid writes to say, “I went home and checked on someone because of Shoulder Check….and it mattered.” Or, “My friends came to me, and I didn’t feel alone.” That’s the point.

Second, in the macro moments. At our events, 2,500 people….families, players, kids….all link up and speak the refrain together. You watch the posture in the building change. You hear “Lean on Me” sung by an arena and feel the message land. Those moments are catalytic….but they exist to seed a million small, private ones later: on buses, in bleachers, down hallways, at kitchen tables.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?

Rob Thorsen: We launched the idea with the Shoulder Check Showcase in August 2023; this year we hosted our third annual showcase. It’s a community-run charity game anchored by NHL players who’ve believed in the mission from day one….people like Chris Kreider, Kevin Shattenkirk, Trevor Zegras, and many others who donate a week of their time to play, meet kids, sign, and amplify the message.

Each year, 2,500 people pack the arena. Before the puck drops, everyone places a hand on a neighbor’s shoulder and repeats our refrain. The response has been overwhelming…..an emotional jolt you can see and hear. This year, New York Rangers anthem singer John Brancy performed the National Anthem and led a “Lean on Me” sing-along. The NHL, the NHLPA, teams, and media have all helped carry the message; we’ve appeared on Good Morning America two years running. The Showcase fuels grassroots adoption…..teams, schools, and communities taking the toolkit and making it theirs. That’s the impact we care about most: replication and daily habit.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Rob Thorsen: I want Shoulder Check to become cultural shorthand for empathy…..like a color you instantly associate with a cause. Think Komen’s pink for women’s health or Movember’s mustache for men’s health. Our teal-aqua should say “kindness, connection, and awareness.” Not as a merch play, but as a signal that prompts action: check on someone right now.

I imagine late-August/September activations timed to back-to-school and fall sports….teams, classrooms, clubs, workplaces…….all making commitments to one another. I want the toolkit to be accessible and flexible: bake sales, 5Ks, pre-game rituals, morning meetings…..however a community wants to manifest it. We’re not raising dollars for a lab; we’re raising awareness for each other. If Shoulder Check becomes the universal cue for “I’m here…..let’s talk,” that’s the dream.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Rob Thorsen: I’ve learned presence over control. In the immediate aftermath, your mind tries to script the unanswerable: Why did this happen? What will my life be a year from now? You can’t solve those questions. What you can do is show up….in this hour, with these people, for this work. When you do that, you give yourself something better than certainty: integrity.

I talk a lot about reflection vs. regret. Reflection is learning from what happened while knowing you did the best you could in the moment. Regret is knowing you didn’t. The line between them is presence. If we keep showing up as honestly as we can, we can live with the outcomes, even the imperfect ones, because we’re learning forward.

And I’ve learned about duality. The loss doesn’t lessen, but growth helps you understand where that loss lives with you. New people come into your life, new work emerges, and you hold both pain and purpose at once. That duality has become the constant: grief and goodness side by side. There is peace in knowing something beautiful can grow from tragedy, even if the sorrow never leaves.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Rob Thorsen: This experience has changed me completely. I sometimes think of myself in three chapters: original Rob 1.0, then Rob 2.0 after Hayden’s death, and now something new….a version who carries both. I wouldn’t say I live in the world in a totally different way, but I see differently. A part of me that was smaller before has been amplified. The idea itself feels like Hayden. Shoulder Check is Hayden. So I feel a duty of care, as if tending this work is tending him.

That sense of duality shapes me too. Pain and purpose live together now. When I watch a stadium of people place hands on shoulders and say our refrain, I think: How did this happen? It’s beautiful, and it’s born of heartbreak. Holding those together has become who I am.

And practically, I’ve changed in how I manage time, people, and vision. We’ve been naïve in believing that a good idea will just travel….and in many ways, that faith has worked. But we’re also at the point where we need to manage like a real business, with intention and sustainability. It’s a “big small business,” and its next stage requires maturity. That responsibility makes me a different leader and a different person.

Ultimately, the change is clarity. Less time for what doesn’t matter, more devotion to what does. More comfort in knowing that if I keep showing up honestly, this work and Hayden’s legacy will keep growing. And if my legacy is simply that people checked in on one another more often, that would be a life well-lived.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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What Matters? September 4, 2025

September

While the calendar insists summer doesn’t officially end until September 22nd, we all know in our hearts that it’s already over. The long, light-filled days are shortening, the back-to-school commercials have returned, and change is everywhere you look. The air feels different. There’s a sense of closing one chapter and opening another. That’s what September is about transitions, beginnings, endings, and the beauty of change.

Change isn’t always easy. In fact, sometimes it’s downright hard. We cling to what’s familiar because it feels safe and comfortable. Letting go of summer feels like letting go of freedom, sunshine, and ease. Yet, what we so often forget is that there are no endings without beginnings. Every door that closes makes way for another to open, often to something we never could have imagined. September reminds us of this truth.

For some, that beginning comes in the form of a new school year. Lunchboxes are packed, backpacks are zipped, and nervous energy fills the air. It’s the end of summer play and the beginning of structure, growth, and discovery. For others, change looks like a new job or a new opportunity a leap of faith into something unfamiliar yet filled with possibility.

And for my son, this fall marks a beginning of the most beautiful kind: marriage. Watching him prepare for this milestone fills me with both joy and awe. This is the end of his chapter as a single man and the beginning of a new adventure as a husband. For my husband and me, it means welcoming an amazing daughter into our family is a gift beyond measure. Change like this is bittersweet, but more than anything, it is joyous. It reminds us that life is meant to grow, evolve, and expand.

Charity Matters is also beginning a new season….Season 9 of our podcast. Nine seasons! That number alone makes me pause. Fourteen years ago, Charity Matters was nothing more than an idea, a simple thought that maybe sharing stories of good could make a difference. That idea grew into a blog, then a community on social media, and eventually, a podcast that has been ranked in the top 5% of charity podcasts. I smile just writing that because it is proof of what happens when you lean into change, when you say yes to new beginnings.

Each season of the podcast brings its own lessons, growth, and yes, change. We stretch, we improve, and we try to make each season better than the last. That stretching has led us to consider something new this fall: sponsorships. For years, I’ve said “no” to countless offers…..everything from yoga pants to dog toys…..because it didn’t align with our mission. But now, we are having conversations with organizations that share our values, partners who could help expand our reach while amplifying stories of service and kindness. The idea of building new partnerships excites me, not just for what it means for Charity Matters, but for the broader ripple effect of good it could create.

September is filled with reminders that life is about movement, not stillness. Change brings growth, growth brings new opportunities, and those opportunities bring joy. This fall, my joy is found in so many places: in the sound of college football filling the weekends, in the crispness of the morning air, in the sight of leaves beginning to turn, and in the celebrations of love and family that mark this season for us.

Of course, there’s a twinge of sadness too. I’ll miss the long days of summer, the ease of evenings outside, and the unhurried pace of the season. But if summer is about savoring, then fall is about celebrating. Celebrating growth, love, progress, and the courage it takes to embrace change.

As we step into September, my hope is that you see the changes in your life not as losses, but as invitations. Invitations to begin again, to stretch, to grow, and to trust that what lies ahead will be beautiful in its own way. Change is never the end….it’s simply the start of something new.

So let’s welcome the change together. Let’s embrace this season with gratitude, joy, and hope. Because while summer may be gone, what awaits us is even more extraordinary.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Non-Profit Heroes August 22, 2025

Charity Matters Podcast Season 9 incoming…

Where did summer go? How are we already buying school supplies? What happened to June 1st until after Labor Day? When I find out who is in charge of shortening summer …well I have a few words for that guy. Here we are with Halloween decorations in the stores while filling our carts with crayons on hot “summer” days. It is all a little surreal how fast these past few weeks have flown by.

This time of year is a little bittersweet for me. Running a nonprofit thats programs end in early August makes summer a huge work push. Just as I am excited for summer and some play time, everyone I know is wrapping up travels and heading back to school and work. August is my summer but it seems that I’m the only one.

In addition to wrapping up this past year’s nonprofit work we have been busy getting ready for Season 9 of the Charity Matters Podcast. It seems like yesterday that we decided to start the podcast and today, 4 years later we are in the top rated podcast in the space. It is so mind blowing to me. Honestly, this fact renews my faith in humanity because all of you believe in goodness and in helping one another. As this message grows so does all the love that goes with it.

Last season we met so many incredible founders. Stories like Terry Grahl’s Enchanted Makeovers, whose life came full circle with her work helping women in shelters. Terry’s life inspires me to be more and do more. Then we met so many awe inspiring parents who lost children and turned their pain into purpose. People like Elliot Kallen of A Brighter Day, who started a nonprofit that supports teenagers dealing with mental health challenges. There was Susan Shaw, founder of WBYC, an organization that provides grief support for grieving communities. Then there was the beautiful Mary Fagnano who created the nonprofit, Thrive N Joy to honor her son Nick’s beautiful legacy.

Each person shared their story, their loss and their life choice to go on through service to others. Every organization and their work is a reflection of their love….which endures in their work. These people and so many more not listed here inspire, lift and remind us what it means to love, to live and to serve.

Next week we will launch Season 9 with Episode 91 with the amazing Mindy Richenstein. I can’t wait for you to meet her and so many other wonderful humans this season. Each founder’s story is like opening a gift about life and how to live. There is nothing that brings me greater joy than sharing these gifts with you.

So thank you for being here for this wild ride, for believing in goodness and being a part of this movement. Each conversation, each share and every single tiny act of kindness moves us all forward together.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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What Matters? August 7, 2025

Vacation all I ever wanted

“Vacation, all I ever wanted… vacation, had to get away…” That epic Go-Go’s anthem has been the soundtrack running through my head these past few weeks. Maybe it’s the heat of August. Maybe it’s the exhaustion catching up with me from our summer work wrapping up. Or maybe it’s just that deep-down yearning for something we all crave but often overlook: rest.

After all, this is the season when the world finally exhales. The emails slow, the calendars loosen, and for a brief window of time, we’re allowed to step back. It’s the one time of year when the word “away” feels not only possible…but necessary.

If you’re someone who gives a lot, whether that’s to your family, your community, your nonprofit, your classroom, your cause……there is a chance that you likely don’t hit pause very often. Helpers tend to put others’ needs ahead of their own, believing there’s always one more thing that can be done, one more person to care for, one more task that can’t wait. The world often celebrates this drive, calling it noble or selfless. And yes, it is but only to a point. Because when we give and give without refueling, eventually… we run out of gas.

I know this feeling well. That running-on-empty sensation, when even the simplest things feel heavy. And yet, pausing still feels like a luxury we can’t quite justify. “Who will do it if I don’t?” we ask. But here’s the truth that’s taken me years to learn: We are no good to others when we are running on fumes.

Self-care isn’t indulgent. It’s not optional. For people who live their lives in service of others, it’s essential. I say that not as a motivational quote on a coffee mug, but as someone who has experienced firsthand what happens when we ignore that inner voice crying out for rest. Our bodies whisper… then nudge… and if we still don’t listen, they shout.

Think about it…would you let your car go 10,000 miles without an oil change? Would you expect a phone to last a week on one charge? Of course not. But somehow, we expect our hearts and minds to keep giving without ever recharging. And worse, we feel guilty when we try.

I want to flip that narrative.

Imagine for a moment that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish, but actually one of the most generous things you can do. Imagine that every walk you take, every nap you allow yourself, every chapter of a good book you read, or every afternoon you spend staring at the ocean, is a gift you are giving, not just to yourself, but to everyone you serve.

Because when we are rested, we are more present. We are more patient. We are more creative, more kind, more joyful. And isn’t that what the world really needs from us?

I’ve learned that vacation doesn’t always have to mean a plane ticket and a suitcase (though those are lovely). Sometimes it means carving out a morning to sit in silence. Sometimes it means saying “no” without guilt. Sometimes it’s a walk around the block, alone with your thoughts. Sometimes it’s stepping away from your inbox or turning off your phone for the afternoon. The point isn’t how long you get away…it’s that you get away. Even just for a little while.

We all have different ways of finding rest and renewal. For me, it’s water and simply being outside to play. Something about the water calms my soul. For others, it’s a mountain trail, a cozy blanket and a journal, or the hum of a favorite song in the background while the world slows down. The important thing is knowing what refuels you and honoring it.

If you’re someone who helps others, who shows up, gives back, volunteers, leads, or serves then please, let this be your permission slip: You are allowed to rest. You are allowed to turn down the noise and just be. You are allowed to have a moment…no, a whole season of care, not just for others, but for you.

Because when we care for ourselves, we’re not quitting. We’re strengthening our ability to keep going.

So yes, vacation is all I ever wanted. Not just the sandy toes and umbrella drinks (although those help too!) but the deeper kind of vacation. The kind where we find our center again, where we remember what matters most, and where we return to ourselves… so that we can return to others whole.

Here’s to rest. Here’s to renewal. And here’s to every helper who finally says, “I need a break” and actually takes one.

You deserve it!

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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On IG @Charitymatters
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Podcast July 30, 2025

A little Blue Sky is good for everyone

Are you an optimist? I definitely am and I love meeting positive people who look at the world through slightly rose colored glasses. So I was especially thrilled when Bill Burke the founder of the Optimism Institute reached out to invite me on his incredible podcast, A Bit of Blue Sky.

Bill founded The Optimism Institute in 2022 after an extensive media career. He was the CEO of The Weather Channel Companies and President of TBS Superstation. Bill co-authored Ted Turner’s top-10 New York Times Best-Selling autobiography Call Me Ted and is a lifelong optimist. He launched The Optimism Institute with a mission to inspire people with an optimistic, hopeful vision of the world and its future. In short, Bill is my people.

It is always terrific to talk to interesting people. Bill is more than just interesting, he is joyful. What I love about what he is doing with his Blue Sky podcast is trying to get all of us to focus on the good. That is exactly what we do here each week at Charity Matters. Life is challenging enough for all of us. When we focus on the positive we feel better, it lifts us up and gives us hope that things are going to get better.

Bill not only has his podcast, which I highly recommend. He also has his Blue Sky Bookshelf where he recommends uplifting books from his guests and others. So take a look here if you are looking for a summer read that inspires and uplifts.

We all can take a page from Bill’s message on optimism. When we choose to focus on optimism, everything shifts. It’s not about ignoring the challenges or pretending life is perfect. Rather, it’s about seeing the light in the cracks, the possibility in the struggle, and the good that can still come from even the hardest moments. Optimism gives us the strength to keep going, to believe in something better, and to inspire that same hope in others. When we lead with optimism, we open the door to connection, to resilience, and to the kind of change that lifts everyone. It’s a mindset that doesn’t just help us survive but thrive.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Inspiration July 24, 2025

Camp is the cure

According to the Associated Press, more than 25 million children under the age of 18 attend camp each year. Of those, 17 million experience the joy of day camps, while 8.3 million head off to overnight adventures. These spaces offer so much more than just activities…..they’re places where kids can make new friends, shed old labels, and explore a little self-reinvention. All of that, wrapped in a whole lot of fun. When we think of summer, we think of camp.

But in light of the recent tragic events in Texas, many of us are looking at camp through a new lens this year. For weeks, we’ve been hearing the brave stories of Camp Mystic counselors who sacrificed so much to protect their young campers. And it wasn’t just Camp Mystic, across the Guadalupe River, stories have emerged from countless camps where courageous counselors put their campers first. We’ve always seen camp counselors as big sisters and brothers, the spirited cheerleaders who bring magic to summer. But this summer, they became heroes.

What many people don’t realize is that most of these incredible counselors, many still in high school or college, are volunteers. They give up their summers not for pay, but to mentor the next generation, to pay forward the gifts they once received. That is the legacy of camp: a place where you arrive timid and unsure, and leave with lifelong memories and a heart full of confidence and new friendships.

For the past thirteen years, I’ve spent my summers at TACSC, a youth leadership organization. All year long, our college students mentor our high school students, who then teach our middle schoolers essential leadership skills. But it’s during our summer conference, our version of camp, where the true magic happens. Over the past 43 years, more than 42,000 young leaders have come through our programs. In my own 13 years, I’ve had the privilege of working with over 22,000 remarkable students.

Each summer, before our campers arrive, I gather our team of dedicated volunteers for a pep talk. Like a coach before a big game, I remind them what it means to lead, to serve, and to give of themselves fully for the benefit of another. We reflect on the people who once poured into us and how we now have the opportunity to do the same. Then, we head out to greet our nervous and excited sixth, seventh, and eighth graders, arriving with their sleeping bags, stuffed animals, and wide eyes.

Within the hour, fear fades and smiles begin to bloom. That’s the magic of camp. It’s the freedom to play, to laugh, and to connect. It’s a space where judgment is left at the door and where kids feel safe to be who they truly are. That’s why 25 million children come back every year. And it’s why so many of those campers grow up to become counselors themselves.

Giving back to a place that shaped you is one of life’s greatest gifts. When a child looks up to a teenager or college student with admiration, it fills that counselor with purpose. And when a counselor tells a seventh grader how funny, smart, or kind they are….something shifts in that child. At TACSC, we call it “the magic.” And I know we’re not alone. It’s happening at camps all across the country.

In a time when we hear so much about youth anxiety and mental health challenges, I truly believe camp is the cure. At camp, students step into responsibility….they wake up on time, get themselves to breakfast, and manage their day. And with every small act of independence, they gain confidence. Without mom or dad there to fix everything, they figure it out. And when they do, they shine.

Now, as I wrap up my 13th summer at our Leadership Conference, I’m more convinced than ever: camp is the cure. Maybe we all need a little more of that magic. A little more play. A little more reinvention. A little more joy. Maybe we could all take a page from our counselors by serving others, giving compliments, listening deeply, being silly, and caring for our tribe. The world would be a kinder, better place if we did.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Ways to make a difference July 8, 2025

How to support the people of Kerr County,Texas

While most of us were enjoying our 4th of July holiday the unthinkable was happening to a community in the hill country of Texas. As many of you have now read and heard the tragic stories of families and children being washed away by an extreme storm that hit early in the morning while many were sleeping. The flood waters rose over 25 feet in under an hours time. As I write this there are 79 dead and at least a dozen young girls still missing from Camp Mystic.

My youngest son lives in Texas and one of his dear friends is a camp counselor at Camp Mystic. She is a lovely girl and she has worked at Camp Mystic every summer. Her family has lived in Kerr County for years. This July 4th she was with my son and his friends in Austin. Fortunately, she wasn’t there when the flood hit but many of her friends were. I reached out to her for ways we can support her community. She shared these go funds me from dear family friends. In addition, there are a few suggestions of ways to help. I wanted to share these links here in blue:

Kerr County Flood Relief Fund

This local community foundation has been established to help rebuild and help those who have lost everything.

Kerrville Pets Alive-

They are working to keep pets and reunite them with their families

Texas on a mission–

Texans on Mission has responded to every natural disaster in Texas since 1967 and many beyond it, including the Southeast Asia tsunami, Hurricane Katrina and the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks. Through a diverse array of ministries, Texans on Mission has provided the calm after the storm for millions.

Texsar (Texas Search and Rescue)

This organization is working around the clock to help find people swept away from these floods

World Central Kitchen

Chef Andres is always there to feed communities, first responders and everyone in a disaster. I remember seeing him in Pasadena hours after the fires. His organization is always there to help and heal.

This has all hit close to home for so many of us. We can not begin to fathom sending our child off to camp only to have the unexpected happen. So many families are hoping and praying tonight. When the fires hit our community in January the world reached out to help. So many of you helped support friends GoFund Me and really wanted to give to someone directly impacted. I asked our sweet friend to feel free to share a few of her friends Go Fund Me’s and I wanted to share those links below as well in blue.

Go Fund Me Accounts:

This account was set up to help Camps Mystic’s recovery

This Go Fund Me is set up for meal deliveries for families affected in the area and run by a family friend

The Broussard Family lost everything in the flood and have a new baby any support is a gift.

When tragedy strikes it is innate to want to help. That is who we were all born to be and what it means to be human. This past January we experienced an outpouring of love from the world when the fires hit our community. It was humbling, inspiring and overwhelming all at once. My hope is that the people of Kerr County feel this love and that it helps to get them through the days, weeks and months ahead.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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What Matters? June 11, 2025

Another lap around the sun

Today is my birthday…my 59th, to be exact. How that happened and when… well, I’m not entirely sure. If my math is correct, I’m quickly sliding toward 60, although I’m pretty convinced I’m still 28.

I love birthdays, no matter the number. Yes, I’m one of those people, I can stretch a birthday into a month-long celebration. And why not? Any excuse to gather with people I love and celebrate life is good enough for me. It’s not just my birthday I love celebrating and genuinely enjoy celebrating everyone’s special day.

For the past thirteen years, my birthday has landed right in the middle of the busiest week of the year at work, so the celebrations have definitely shifted a bit. This year is no different. We’re hustling to distribute the last of our scholarship funds and getting all our future leaders registered for summer programs. It will be a busy birthday, perhaps not as festive as in years past, but one still full of purpose, which is a gift in itself.

This year, for my birthday, I’m asking for a gift from you. I’d love to know: what is your favorite cause and why? What organization or mission speaks to your heart?

I always love hearing from you, but your answers truly inspire me. They open my eyes to new causes and remind me of the incredible impact we can make when we care about something deeply. So please, take a moment and share what moves you.

To be honest, the greatest gift is simply knowing that we’re all here to serve one another. Thank you for being here, for caring, and for being part of this amazing community. You are the greatest gift of all.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration May 28, 2025

Halfway through 2025

June is just around the corner, which means we’re somehow halfway through the year. I’m not quite sure how that happened, but it definitely snuck up on me. Like many of us, I kicked off the year with a laundry list of goals. I love making lists, so trust me when I say that I set out to accomplish a lot. My philosophy is simple: if I don’t at least put it out there, it will never happen. And even if I only achieve half, I’m still moving the ball of life forward in some positive direction… or at least that’s what I tell myself.

Now, I’ll admit there are more than a few goals that haven’t seen the light of day. My commitment to return to yoga once a week? Not even close. I haven’t so much as stretched. Total fail. Sunday meal prep? Another great idea that has yet to materialize. And then there’s the long list of home improvement projects… still untouched. Let’s just say there’s definitely room for growth and improvement. But hey, that’s what Q3 and Q4 are for, right?

Looking back, though, there have been some solid wins. The book has been doing extremely well and it is such a joy to see that dream growing. My husband and I set a goal for quarterly adventures, and we’ve actually stuck to it! We’re on track to keep exploring and adventuring through the rest of the year, and that feels really good. I’ve made progress on the goal to scroll less and read more. I’m absolutely reading more…though if I’m honest, I’m not sure the scrolling has slowed down. So we’ll call that a partial win. What I am proud of is my commitment to being more present, being a better friend, and being a verb instead of a noun. This has been a year of action, and those are definitely strides worth celebrating at this mid-year checkpoint.

Of all the goals, the one I’m most proud of is the one my sister and I made together: spending more intentional time with our dad. We promised monthly “dates with Dad,” and it’s been one of the most meaningful accomplishments of the year. Sure, spending time with our dad is always good, but actually planning fun outings and experiences has created beautiful memories—and quality time that we all cherish. It was meant to be a gift for him, but in truth, we’re the ones who’ve received the greatest gift. We’ve road-tripped to Arizona to see family, explored museums, gone boating with his siblings, and we have more adventures ahead. Time with those you love really is the ultimate gift.

As I look ahead to the rest of the year, I know there’s still a lot I want to accomplish. Starting June 1st, I’m diving into a new workout and nutrition plan so that should help check off a few of the lingering health goals. Who knows, maybe I’ll even get around to meal prepping. A girl can dream, right? We’re all works in progress, and that means celebrating what we have done while still setting our sights on what we can do. Six months is still plenty of time to make meaningful progress. As far as I’m concerned, it’s never too late to start. As the Carroll shelby quote says in the photo above,”Persistence is the most important thing in life.”

So here’s to June….a fresh start, a second half, and a second chance to get it right… or at least move that ball one step farther down the field…persistently.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Profile May 21, 2025

Episode 88: A Brighter Day

I am so excited to introduce you today to an amazing man, Elliot Kallen. He is a passionate entrepreneur, nonprofit founder, and father who has transformed personal tragedy into a mission of hope. As the CEO of multiple companies and the founder of A Brighter Day, Elliot brings both business acumen and deep empathy to his work. After losing his 19-year-old son, Jake, to suicide, Elliot committed himself to supporting teens struggling with depression and anxietywith his nonprofit, A Brighter Day.

Today his organization touches thousands of families each month. Grounded in the life lessons passed down from his Holocaust-survivor mother, Elliot lives with a deep sense of purpose—driven not by profit, but by impact. His story is one of resilience, love, and an unwavering belief in the power of helping others.

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what A Brighter Day does?

Elliot Kallen: What we do is we create resources for teens and their families on stress and depression with the goal of stopping teen suicide.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing up and your family?

Elliot Kallen: I’m the CEO of three companies right now. I grew up in a very middle-class home in New Jersey. My parents were community-minded and active members of our local synagogue. We gave money, even though my dad never made more than forty thousand dollars a year, and my mom was your typical 1960s–70s stay-at-home mom. Still, we gave back.

My mom often spoke about her father, who was a librarian in Vienna and probably made five dollars a week during the Great Depression. Every week, he would empty the change from his pockets, and that’s what he would donate. We were always taught to give back. Most of the time, that meant giving to family or helping cousins around the world.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start A Brighter Day?

Elliot Kallen: It’s a heartbreaking story, and sadly, it doesn’t have a happy ending. Eleven years ago, my 19-year-old son, Jake—a sophomore at the University of Montana—took his life in the early hours of a Friday morning. No drugs, no alcohol. He walked onto the highway and stepped in front of a truck.

We were frantically searching for him all day because his phone was off—something no teenager ever does. At 6:30 that evening, FedEx delivered a six-page suicide note. That’s how we found out he was gone. His note was filled with the typical ramblings of a teen in crisis, but one paragraph stood out. He wrote, “Mom and Dad, I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. I never would have told you how I felt. I never would have asked for your help. And I never would have taken your help.”

It was as if he was trying to let us off the hook—but how could we ever be?

His mother and I flew to Spokane the next morning, then drove to Missoula to claim his body, which had been left unclaimed at a funeral home. On the flight home, his body in the cargo hold beneath us, I kept rereading that paragraph. I turned to his mother and said, “We have to do something to prevent this devastation from happening to other families.” She replied, “I can’t do it. You’re on your own.” And so, I began the journey to create a nonprofit.

At first, the idea was to use music—bring in adult cover bands and host events for teens with mental health resources. But when we met with local musicians, they gave me critical advice: “This has to be for teens—by teens. No adult bands, no adults in the room. Teens won’t open up if they feel watched. And the resources have to be teen-friendly. Most mental health tools are built for adults, and they miss the mark.”

We decided to focus on depression, anxiety, and suicide prevention—issues teens face every day. A recent survey showed that nearly 50% of teens have felt anxious or depressed in the past year, and many have had suicidal thoughts.

I often describe it like this: imagine a six-sided box—four walls, a top, and a bottom. For teens, it’s rarely all blue sky. Life can feel like constant turmoil. And when all six sides of the box feel black—when it’s all pain and no light—some teens begin to believe, “Yesterday was awful. Tomorrow will be worse. No one will miss me anyway.”

That moment—that hopelessness—is where suicide lives. That’s what we’re trying to stop.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Elliot Kallen: I don’t want to downplay how cathartic it’s been to start a nonprofit and to share Jake’s story—especially in that first year. Every time I told it, I could barely hold back tears. What surprised me was how many people shared their own stories in return—about their uncle, aunt, parent, sibling. We cried together. I kept tissues nearby and handed them out often. If you cried in my office, chances are I was crying too.

Sometimes, I still go to the cemetery. Nothing changes—the view, the conversation—but it grounds me. I stand on Jake’s grave to read the plaque, and I talk to him. I talk to God. I don’t want to imagine Jake’s face in the clouds like a movie ending. But I do hope he’s listening.

I’ve built and sold businesses, so I understand the lifecycle—products, services, cash flow, lawsuits, people problems. A nonprofit is different. You still have people issues—because people are people—but the bigger challenge is constantly telling the story in a way that touches hearts. That’s not hard for me. The hard part is finding the right audience to tell it to. Filling rooms, building an online following, gaining traction—that’s the uphill battle.

And here’s the truth: every nonprofit is regional—until it either goes national or goes out of business. I’ve served on national boards like the Boys and Girls Clubs and the American Cancer Society. They were national before I joined. My nonprofit, A Brighter Day, has resources used in all 50 states, but when it comes to fundraising, we’re still very local. Regional nonprofits live hand-to-mouth. That means I need to lead, write checks, and carry the mission forward every day.

But I don’t want to die and take the nonprofit with me. I’m working hard to build sustainability so I can eventually step back from being the de facto leader and just serve as a board member. We talk constantly about that next step—about building longevity and putting a structure in place so A Brighter Day has legs without me.

I believe there should always be a Kallen on the board—because it began with us—but they don’t have to lead. They just need to show up once a year, wherever they live, to remind others why we exist. This began with Jake, but it doesn’t have to end with me. That’s the goal.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Elliot Kallen: I’ve been very blessed in my life. Even after losing my son to suicide, I still consider myself incredibly fortunate. I grew up in a small, middle-class home, but I was always deeply loved. My father was part of the Greatest Generation and my mother survived Auschwitz. They had both seen unthinkable tragedy and loss.

Their voices still guide me—what I call the “schizophrenic voices” on my shoulders, not devil and angel, but Mom and Dad. My father’s message was always, “You can never make up for hard work,” and he instilled that in his three children—we all became workaholics. My mother’s voice says, “You can do better today than you did yesterday, and better tomorrow than today.”

That mindset stays with me. I still come to work each day with energy and excitement, whether it’s in my for-profit ventures or in the nonprofit space. In business, I’m always asking how we can grow, improve, and learn from our missteps—because mistakes are just painful learning moments. In the nonprofit world, the question is: how do we serve more people, more effectively, without burning through resources?

Every organization, for-profit or nonprofit, has a financial burn rate. If you ignore that, one day you wake up and can’t make payroll. That’s the reality. Whether or not you call it capitalism, we’re all accountable to the numbers—even in service work.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?

Elliot Kallen: Right now, through A Brighter Day and all our online resources at abrighterday.info, we’re reaching thousands. One of our biggest tools is a teen-focused texting crisis line that gets 50 to 150 new teens every month. They receive a response within five minutes—because teens love to text—and almost every single one asks the same heartbreaking question: “Am I the only one feeling this way?” They’re incredibly isolated.

We also know that if your teen came to you and said, “Mom, I’m cutting” or “I’m thinking about hurting myself,” you’d do everything you could to get them help. But in most places it can take 6 to 10 weeks to get a live appointment with a licensed therapist. We can connect teens with a licensed therapist via Zoom in all 50 states within seven days. And while virtual counseling isn’t quite the same as being in the room, it’s still meaningful support—and we cover the cost for 90 days.

Right now, we’re reaching between 3,000 and 6,000 families every single month.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Elliot Kallen: If there’s one word that defines our goal, it’s impact. We want to make a meaningful difference in people’s lives, and that only happens if our message truly reaches them.

People ask me, “Where do you see yourself in 20 years?” My honest answer: I hope I’m still alive—but not still running the charity. That would mean I failed to build something sustainable. What I really hope is that, at my funeral, someone stands up and says, “He made a major impact on everyone he touched.” That’s the legacy I’m striving for.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Elliot Kallen: The biggest lesson? Life is incredibly short. My mother used to say, “Life goes by in the blink of an eye,” and I never understood it until I got older—but she was right.

You can’t take life for granted. You have to show up every day with the right attitude, because attitude really iseverything. If you keep putting in the effort with heart and intention, good things follow.

What truly matters is the people around you, the lives you touch, the impact you make. It’s not just about who’s impacted you—it’s about how many lives you can reach and make better. If you focus on that, you’re doing something truly great.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Profile May 7, 2025

Episode 87: Raregivers Global

You’ve heard me say it time and time again—the universe constantly places incredible people in my path. Sometimes I think my brain has a special filter that helps me find the very best humans on this planet. A few months ago, I was speaking to a National Charity League group and selling books when this bright light of a woman approached to buy a few. We started talking, and of course—she’s a nonprofit founder! But she is so much more than that. Her story is as amazing as she is.

I am truly excited for you to meet Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin and hear her incredible journey of service with her nonprofit, RareGivers Global—a worldwide network that provides emotional support to caregivers of those with rare, chronic, and complex diseases. Did you know that 350 million people worldwide live with a rare disease? That’s 1 in 15 families globally who are navigating these caregiving challenges. Cristol’s story is ultimately a love story—for her brothers, whom she lost to a rare disease—and how she now uses her life to help countless others.

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Raregiver Global does?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: Raregivers cares for the caregivers. We are all about providing emotional relief services to caregivers that are living in what we call a radical caregiving environment. We work specifically with patients, parents and healthcare professionals in rare, chronic and complex diseases. There’s about 10,000 uncured rare diseases that have been genetically identified, and it’s not a small community. It’s the wrong word… rare. The rare disease community is actually one in 10 families in the United States, and one in 15 worldwide.

This is really radical caregiving. This is 24/7 medical management at home. This is doing skilled nursing interventions like administering epileptic medications every hour on the hour, 24/7 for decades.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing Up…Did you have any indicators that maybe you would go into this type of work?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My parents met when they were 15—he was the football captain, she was the cheerleader. They married at 19 and told their pediatrician they wanted a big family. Within eight years, they had five children. What my mother didn’t know was that she was a carrier for Hunter Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder affecting boys.

My oldest brother didn’t have it, but my younger brothers David, Jared, and Randy did. My mom noticed early delays in their development. Eventually, they received the diagnosis: Hunter Syndrome. There’s no cure. Our family went through every phase of grief, holding on to hope.

I was 10 when Randy passed at 12. My other brothers passed at 18 and 19. I was 10, 14, and 15 when they died. Not long after, my parents divorced. Later, I learned that divorce rates are six times higher in rare disease families. Depression, anxiety, and addiction rates are also staggeringly high among caregivers.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Raregivers Global?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: You even mentioned in your book, Change for Good, the impact of mortality events. I think there is a moment in your life where you realize you’re mortal. You think, I may not be on the planet as long as I thought I was going to be. This is not a dress rehearsal and we only have one life to make our mark. I always wanted to be in an environment where I can give back and to have some sort of meaningful element to the work I’m doing. That moment for me was far after my brothers had passed.

As I started thinking about starting a family. I was genetically tested and actually found out that I was a carrier. And based on that, my dad and I go to the national MPs (Hunter’s Syndrome) family conference. We walk in the door and we look around and there are all these young men that look like my brothers. It just gave me chills.

I came home and said to my girlfriends, “There’s a part of my history that I’ve never really shared with you. And I want to do something.” We started a fundraising organization called Angel Aid. Angel is a moniker, A, N, G, E, L which stands for A Nonprofit Group Enriching Lives.

It took awhile but we raised $50,000 and in 2002 we received a matching research grant which went on to become an FDA approved treatment. The research doctor had this very elegant idea that if the kids are missing the enzyme, they need to create a synthetic version of that enzyme, and we’ll flush it through their body like dialysis, Enzyme Therapy. We went through FDA approval that funded research. Then we went through clinical trial, and now young men that would have passed away in their teens are going off to college.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: The challenge is that missions morph. Angel Aid was the precursor to Rare Givers. And here’s the challenge. There’s no cures for any of these diseases. Community is not a cure, it’s a treatment. I mentioned 10,000 rare diseases, one in 10, one in 15. Worldwide, that’s 350 million families and there’s only treatments for 5% of that community. So the challenge is the other 95% have no options, none. They’re going through the same cycles that my family went through holding hope and grief in the same heart every single day.

In 2016, I went in and I got a routine mammogram. I came out with a breast cancer diagnosis. I was like, Oh no, well, there’s another shift in mortality. Now I have a 10 year old. I’m married. What hit my heart was, what am I waiting for? I thought my community was the MP/Hunter’s Syndrome community. Then I realized, my community is this much broader community. I was waking up every single night, thinking these families with rare diseases must all be in emotional crisis. There’s no cures. That community needs emotional support like I received with breast cancer support.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My mother inspires me because, as I mentioned, my parents divorced, and my mother went on a very deep, dark journey with alcohol, gambling, with any really kind of escape mechanism to deal with the pain and grief.

We can’t imagine the choices that my family’s had to make. Somewhere along the way, her faith pulled her through, and she got sober. She came back to me. My mom showed up for my daughter and my family in a way that was really profound. She actually reconnected with my father and did a lot of really healing conversations. So what fuels me is very personal, but it’s also, an example of what can happen in rare disease families. This is the joy to the grief.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: We’ve identified 287 pieces of published research on the emotional toll of rare disease caregiving. From this, we developed an emotional journey map outlining six stages families go through—from noticing changes in a loved one to diagnosis, caregiving, and end-of-life care.

We started with seven women in a living room in 2019. Today, we’ve reached 77,000 families. Our guidebook—thanks to Microsoft—has been translated into 12 languages. With AI tools, they’re working on 400 more. Our goal? Reach 3.5 million rare givers by 2026. What do we need now? Funding. But we have momentum on our side.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: I dream big. My dream is very clear and specific. I want Dolly Parton to write a song about RareGivers. Then Melinda Gates will hear it, fund a $10 million endowment, and Oprah will spread the word to hospitals worldwide. Colin Farrell, whose son has a rare disease, will join in. Chris Hemsworth will visit rare disease families in Australia. Eva Longoria will thank us at a L’Oréal event. John Mayer will bring a Hunter Syndrome patient onstage. And Julia Roberts will direct and star in an Amazon series to educate the world. That’s my dream.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: When I was younger, I used to think that I was creating change in the world and I would just muscle it out and use my intellect, my network, connections, skills and just manifest change. During COVID, it was just a global pandemic, that humbles you in a way that you just can’t deny. We had to relaunch Rare Givers. I started realizing that I can’t muscle through this.

I was looking at my mother, she’s a very strong woman of faith, and I really had not cultivated that side of my heart and my soul. The word surrender just kept coming up again and again. It brings me to tears, because as soon as I surrendered the outcome, then it just became an exercise in faith. I will tell you that the miracles just start coming, and then you start living in gratitude, hopping from miracle to miracle and that exact right person arrives.

Charity Matters: You mentioned there was a happy ending to your familY’s story, can you share it with us?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My parents married young and lost three of their five children. They divorced, remarried, divorced again, and married new partners for 20 years. Both were widowed in the same year our daughter Chloe was born.

Chloe’s arrival reopened their hearts. After 35 years apart, they began dating again. And last year, at 81 years old, we remarried them—60 years after their original wedding. That’s our happy ending.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration May 1, 2025

Refueling

Before Easter I was hanging by a thread. Thank you to all who reached out with wonderful support and kind comments, your emails and thoughts mean more than you know. Truth be told I was simply out of gas. The past few months of running a nonprofit has taken its toll. I don’t usually pause but push through. This time there simply wasn’t enough in the reserve tank to do so. I had no choice but to stop, to wait and to refuel for as long as it took to recharge these very empty batteries.

Easter was so much fun! Our middle son is engaged and his beautiful fiance and her family joined ours for the first time. That was fuel for my tank. A houseful of love and family and laughter. Pure sunshine and joy that reminded me how blessed we are. Then there was actual Spring Break. No, I didn’t leave my desk but since schools were closed the phones didn’t ring and it felt like a retreat of sorts. No in person meetings and a week to dig out was restorative.

Then this past weekend, we celebrated the happy couple’s engagement with bringing so many family and friends together to celebrate these two beautiful people starting their life together. It poured rain all day until an hour before the party. Then the sun came out and it was a glorious day on so many levels. People came from far and wide and the love in the room was palpable. That is the fuel that makes me go, love. It is the best energy source available here on earth and one that is renewable if properly tended.

Then I came home to receive this note from Susie Shaw, who you met last week with her podcast William’s Be Yourself Challenge. Susie said, “I’m truly touched to have the opportunity to share William’s story and the mission behind WBYC with your audience. It was a privilege to connect with you, and I’m so grateful for the thoughtful, heartfelt way you approach your work. I’m excited to share the episode and blog post with our community. Thank you again for the opportunity and for all that you do to shine a light on service, hope, and impact. It truly means so much.”

This is why I do this work. Not for the accolades but to know that these conversations matter. Susie went on to share that her community had a devastating loss last week with three teens killed in a car accident. She was able to begin working with grieving families that had helped her in her enormous time of loss. To give back to those that held her up. Hearing about moments like these lifts me up. It refuels my faith in humanity and gives me hope.

To end a full week, on Sunday and Tuesday I spoke to two different groups about Change for Good. It was terrific to hear from people who had read the book and hear how it had inspired them . It was lovely knowing that people who read the book were now buying it for friends and family to inspire them to serve. Hearing from people who had found renewal in serving others also refueled me. Knowing that the message of service as the ultimate silver bullet is resonating with people brings me such joy.

While my tank is more than halfway filled, I am renewed by love, by kindness and by the compassion of others. It is the best way to keep moving forward.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration April 25, 2025

Episode 86: William’s Be Yourself Challenge

Easter has passed and we are officially into springtime, the season of renewal. There is no greater renewal story than today’s guest Susan Shaw. Susie and her husband lost their nine year old son William in an accident. In the years that followed they have taken that pain and turned into purpose for other grieving families.

Join us today for a powerful conversation about love, loss and renewal. Susie’s journey is one of inspiration and hope that there is always love.

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what WBYC does?

Susie Shaw: At WBYC, we empower individuals to embrace their authentic selves with courage and joy. We are dedicated to fostering meaningful connections within our community and supporting grieving families by providing the tools they need to honor their loved ones and navigate their journeys of healing. Together, we create spaces where love, remembrance, and personal growth flourish.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start WBYC?

Susie Shaw: We started the organization shortly after my son William died. He died in 2019, when we were on a family ski trip out in Montana. William was nine. There was an accident and, as you can imagine, it was one of the most painful and excruciating events that I’ve ever experienced. The beauty that came from my community after he died, was incredible. I live in a very small town, where everybody knows everybody.

When William died, he was in third grade and the whole town suffered with us. As time went on, we started to notice and hear that some of William’s friends and parents were still struggling in their grief. A year after William had died, my husband and my surviving son, Kai, were getting support. We were going to the grief groups because there are services for people like us there. There aren’t any services for best friends.

If you’re the friend of a little boy who dies, there’s no support group for that right? I was so close with all of these families that I just hated what I was seeing for them. So a group of moms got together with my permission, and they decided to put on our very first event playing a game William loved. When we saw the excitement and the beauty and the love that all these kids felt for each other while honoring William and they had that agency over their feelings. Williams Be Yourself Challenge spawned out of that inaugural event. We went on to host an educational lecture and brought in a therapist to talk about grieving for the community.

I also realized how privileged my family has been in our grief journey and the support that we have received through therapy and our beautiful community. My husband got to take six months off of work. That is not the norm. We had this unbelievable privilege of him taking those six months and we got to travel as a new family of three to figure out. We were able to create some new memories. All this stuff that happened in the early months after William died was percolating in me. A while after, I thought,” I wish other families could have this. I wish other families could go away, because sometimes home is hard. The bedroom is there, the toys are there.” There’s all these reminders.

We’re currently raising money to be able to buy a single family home for families who have suffered the loss of either a child or a parent. We want to be able to give 52 families per year a free week-long vacation. I realized that getting away was so incredibly important for our family. Now all I want to do is allow other families to have just a week. Isn’t long enough, but it’s something.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Susie Shaw: I am an entrepreneur. And that was something I had never done before. This isn’t me. My first job out of college, I was in the nonprofit space. I worked for the United Cerebral Palsy of Chicago. I was their events planner, and it was an amazing job. Then I worked at the Museum of Modern Art in New York in their development office and at the LA County Museum of Art. So, I had this past of service and understanding of the world of philanthropy and giving.

Some of my challenges have been being the starter. Before, when I was in nonprofit, I was the worker. Now I’m telling people what to do. I’m walking that line of not trying not to control too much, but needing help finding the right help. Now we need expertise in real estate and in planned giving.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Susie Shaw: I just think about the families that I want to serve because I know what it feels like to need that support, you know. I’ve walked their path. And I certainly don’t want to insinuate that I know what every grieving family feels like, because every grieving family has their own unique story. However, I do think that some of the things we want to do for these families are universal. You want to be cared for. You want to be seen in your grief. You want to be witnessed in your grief, and know that somebody is looking out for you who understands.

And so that’s what I think about when, when I get off a call with a potential donor who just doesn’t get it or isn’t interested in the project.. It happens. You’re not going to relate to everybody. Then I go back to the families because I’ve been there and I know how painful it is.

I just want to be able to give other families that same little bit of hope to know that they’re going to be able to survive. I was so afraid that my family would disintegrate after William died. Instead, we had a ton of support, a ton of guidance and we’re doing wonderfully. We brought a new child into our life. We have a four year old, Cody and he is just the best thing that we could have done for our family.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?

Susie Shaw: it’s hard to quantify, because what we’re trying to do is such an emotional experience. We don’t have a program where we’re hiring therapists to execute with immeasurable results. However, I do think about success in getting feedback from a family who spends a week at our house and telling me that it was transformative, that it was healing and that it was important. I also think about those families than telling their friends about it, and maybe those friends then donate to us. That, to me, is a measure of success. Or those guests that come to our house and tell their grief support groups about their experience and create a referral system. That’s a measure of success. The fact that people are recognizing that this is a needed service within the grief space is success as well.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Susie Shaw: if we had a network of grief retreat homes for families. That would be beyond my wildest dream. Then we could serve double and triple and quadruple the amount of families. With one house, we can serve 52 families a year, if we were to have people there all year.

Judy’s house is a grief support group out of Denver and they partner with New York Life Foundation. Both are responsible for sort of quantifying data around bereaved families. Their newest report has just come out. They have found that one in 11 children will suffer the loss of a sibling or a parent before they turn 18. Wow. That is so many families! 52 families to me, sounds like an amazing feat, but that’s barely scratching the surface of how many families need grief support. If we can have more, let’s have more!

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Susie Shaw: I’m grateful for every moment. There’s no rush in any of this. Let’s just be really intentional about what we decide to do today or this week or this month, and that’s really helped me slow down in everything. I just feel like I’m a better human being.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Susie Shaw: When William died, my entire life changed 100%. I am a mother and I have two living children as well. I identify as a bereaved mother. Sometimes first, because it has changed me so much more than even becoming a mother. Losing a child has changed me more than giving birth to three children.

I think I’m a better person. I really do. And I talk a lot with other bereaved moms. There’s a similar sentiment among many of us. I mean, we were just cracked open. Everything just came pouring out….The good, the bad, all of it and I guess I just feel like I’ve grown so much in my empathy and for all types of people. Especially with my little four year old, I am so much more patient because I view motherhood in a new way…… that we all just need to slow down.

CHARITY MATTERS.

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

www.Charity-Matters.com
On IG @Charitymatters
Post a screenshot & key takeaway on your IG story and tag me @heidijohnsonoffical and @Charitymatters so we can repost you.
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