I hope you had a great Labor Day weekend and are enjoying this short week! Speaking of labor, I work hard and want my work to matter, to make a difference. I admit, I am a little competitive too. However, I’m not always good at metrics and score keeping. People ask me about stats and numbers for our subscribers, listeners and all of that and to be honest, I am so busy creating that I rarely look. Should I be looking more often? Yes, I know. I’m more competitive with myself than with others.
If I look and see that we are not doing as great as another podcast that can sometimes stop me from moving forward. I understand that analytics are important but somehow that isn’t the measuring stick that I usually use. My measuring stick is your comments, your emails, when you tell me something you did because of what you read here. That is what fuels me forward.
Last week I was the guest on a terrific new podcast called Mom to More. The format is interviewing women who have been at home with their children for at least ten years and telling their journey back to work. It was a great conversation. During our talk, Sharon Macey, the host, mentioned her new podcast ranking. I asked her where she found her data. Because getting insights from Apple isn’t the easiest in my experience. She told me she uses ListenNotes
Naturally, I pulled up Listen Notesand discovered that we are ranked in the top 5% of podcasts in our catagory out of over three million podcasts in the world. WhooHoo! I was over the moon to see those numbers and that is because of you! All of you listen and share these episodes, spreading the word of people doing good. Since today is the International Day of Charity, I can not think of a better way to celebrate. I am so grateful to this beautiful tribe. You are the people changing the world each day by investing in kindness. You make choices what to listen to and you choose good. I am beyond grateful to you, thank you.
CHARITY MATTERS.
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In full disclosure, my husband has called me Dharma for years. If you remember the TV show called Dharma and Greg? You know the one where the husband is all about facts and figures and his wife is a little WhooWhoo and out there. The truth is I definitly have some Dharma in me. Ever since I lost my mom, there have beem so many unexplained “coincidences” in my life that I am open to what God, the Universe is trying to tell me. The Dharma has come out in me for sure!
A few weeks ago, I was on a group call with the publisher of my upcoming book, along with many of the other women authors they represent. We meet weekly to connect and share our writing journeys with one another. On this zoom meeting, I met a woman named Kim Beam who offered to give me a reading. She is lovely. A hospital social worker by day, an author and someone who has a gift to share with the world.
Truth be told, I was terrified of a reading. I had never had one before. What was she going to see and say? Why is it that the first thing that comes to your mind is bad news? That is exactly where my mind went. Kim said, “I would love to talk to you about your book.” Certainly, this has been one of the scariest things I have ever done. You feel incredibly vulnerable putting yourself out there and it is scary. Nervously, I said,” That would be great. I would like to know if I’m on the right path?” It couldn’t hurt to ask, right?
I was a guest on Kim’s podcast, Intuitive Insights. The episode is above. After receiving the reading, I again felt vulnerable sharing it. Am I so weird that I even had this reading? Will people think I’m crazy? All of these thoughts raced through my head. As soon as the negative thoughts passed, I realized that once again to be brave you must be vulnerable. In life you have to take risks. You have to try if you really want to make a difference.
So here I am, Dharma and all. Nervous, excited, thrilled, terrified and proud of myself, all at once.
It would be great to be a New York Times best-selling author. But you know what is even better than that? Trying and jumping into the arena. I signed up to get in the race and I’m close to the finish line. At the end of the day, all we can do is try our best. If that means being vulnerable in order to use our gifts to the greatest good, then here we go….
CHARITY MATTERS.
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Last week, I was at the grocery store when they asked me if I wanted to round up for charity. Of course my answer was yes. Who doesn’t want to give forty-four cents to a cause they care about. For that matter, who uses change anymore? It was easy, it was effortless and it made me feel great when I really didn’t do anything. It got me wondering how many round up apps and organizations are out there and are they working?
The results made me really happy and I thought they were worth a share. There are a number of apps that individuals can get to give to a cause when they make a purchase. Apps such as RoundUp or Coin Up are for people who want to give their extra change with their own purchases or like me at the store when the company asks me if I want to donate my change? RoundUp works both ways. You can pick a cause and “RoundUp” every purchase for a cause you care about. The app may partner with a store or restaurant you frequent and you can “Round Up” that way.
In the United States alone we donated more than $470 Billion dollars last year and more than 60% of that was from individual donors. According to Engage for Good which tracks point of sale donations, in 2022 nonprofits raised $749 million dollars in point of sale donations. It seems that corporations are jumping on the giving bandwagon. The Taco Bell Foundation alone brought in over $42 million dollars last year from its Round Up partnership with its 7,500 restaurants across the country. Now that is some serious change for good!
CHARITY MATTERS.
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As summer comes to an end, back to school brings us another chance to start anew, especially for our children. Fall is a time for everyone to shed the old and begin again. It isn’t just for students. When we are looking at ways to improve ourselves we don’t always think about helping others. We usually think about losing weight or making more money. If we really want to change, wouldn’t changing for good be a great starting point?
Let’s take a moment to think about what gifts we have that could help someone else? What I am asking you is what is in your tool box? Maybe you have a passion for gardening and you could work with schools to develop their gardens or work on an inner city garden? The options for your gifts and matching the needs of others is endless.
The challenge is that we do not think about our gifts as things to give away. It doesn’t just have to be money that we give. The greatest gift we have is our time and our talent so why don’t we start with giving those first? Think about your gifts. You are an accountant, an attorney, an artist, a baker, in marketing, an organizer, whatever it is you do for a living there is a gift in that skill. It is a gift that someone can use. There is a match for a nonprofit that needs just the gift you have. Giving doesn’t need to be menial, it needs to be joyful.
Once you have figured out what you are good at and you know your gifts, now the fun part is to begin to think about where to give them away. You don’t want to give your gifts to just anyone, hopefully there is a cause you care about. What makes you so fired up thinking about it that you need to do something? Let’s start with that.
Then it’s time to ask yourself a few questions. What change do you want to see? Do you care about the rainforest or are you worried about the literacy rate in America? Starting to understand the problem you want to address will let you know if this is what you want to get more involved with. We need to understand the problems before we can begin to identify solutions and how we can be a part of them.
The bigger the problem, the slower the change and the longer it can take to see an impact. Solving a problem like breast cancer research can be slow. Ask yourself where you will see change and who will benefit from this change? Then ask yourself what the timeline is that you are looking for. There are no wrong answers but asking yourself these questions will help set you up for success with whichever path you pursue.
There are 1.6 million nonprofits with a need for people to help and share their gifts. Today, there are dating apps for singles but in the nonprofit space there are a number of great sites to match people and skills. One of the best is calledcatchafire.org Think of it as Linkedin or Bumble for nonprofits.
You can go onto their site and list your skills as an attorney, graphic artist, accountant, marketing and then list what causes you care about. For example, say that you love animals and are a graphic designer. CatchAFire will match you with a project from a nonprofit such as creating graphics for a new fundraising campaign. It is an incredible way to try on a cause, meet new people and build your resume while making a difference.
There are other sites that have more traditional volunteer work likeVolunteerMatch.com You can put in your zip code and be given a wide range of opportunities in your area which is a terrific way to meet people in your community and make a difference. This is another great place to begin to dip your toe into the giving back pool of joy. Let’s make sure this fall we are all changing for good!
CHARITY MATTERS.
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Thirteen years ago when I started Charity Matters when our sons were sixteen, fourteen and ten. Today, they are 29, 27 and 23 so time has flown by. Each of you has walked this journey of service and parenting with me for all these years. I am beyond grateful to each of you. It feels like yesterday that I shared the story of our middle son, Henry’s, last football game, called The Last Pass. Followed by the story of the The Last Lunch . There were so many last before Henry left for college. Again, you followed along on my love letter called , A Mother’s Sendoff .
It has been such a priviledge to share our son’s journeys with you. I am thrilled to share that Henry got engaged this past weekend to his amazing fiance Shelby. We are on cloud nine seeing two people we love so dearly are so incredibly happy. These are the moments we live for, remember and cherish.
This week we are celebrating with Shelby’s family and enjoying summer and our precious time together. Thank you for walking this journey with our family and for understanding that our Season Eight is going to be a little late. We will be busy smiling and celebrating just a little bit longer.
CHARITY MATTERS.
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As most of you know I have spent the past few months wrapping up the book. In the process, the publisher is an amazing connector and loves to bring all of her authors together for weekly coffee connections via zoom. It is so great to meet other female authors and some of the most interesting and inspiring women. A couple months back I was in a zoom chat room when I met Siobhan Shaw, a fellow nonprofit founder.
I’m so excited to share Siobhan and her husband, John’s, incredible story in the creation of their nonprofit, Growing to Give. Their story is a beautiful full circle reminder of following your heart, your roots and always thinking of ways to serve others.
Here are a few highlights from our conversation:
Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Growing to Give does?
Siobhan Shaw: Our mission is to provide sustainable agricultural systems to small scale community farmers in marginalized and climate vulnerable communities. We help them grow more food with less resources, specifically water, fertilizer, space, labor, and increase their production and the quality of the food coming off their farms and gardens. So that when they’re giving the food they grow to food banks, or they’re selling it through farm markets to actually support the operations, their nonprofit operations, they are actually turning a profit in a nonprofit way.
We want to free people from hunger, we have partners in Africa and 60% of the population of Africa is going hungry. There’s to be no one going to bed hungry at night, by choice.
Charity Matters: Did you grow up in a philanthropic family?
Siobhan Shaw: I grew up on a farm. I was the lucky one. My mom was the farmer. My dad went to work. They had both served in World War II. Not only had my parents served their country, and sacrificed greatly. They lived through the Depression as young people and then they raised five children.
We took not only care of the environment, and we took care of other people. If you didn’t have something, somebody else had something. There was a lot of trading and there was always people coming to our home. We had this big dining room table, and it was full with family as well as with people that didn’t have a place to go.. Helping people was just in my DNA.
Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Growing to Give?
Siobhan Shaw: My husband John grew up on a farm as well. So we had already been together, almost a decade. I was in the film industry in casting and producing. John was in construction and our life was amazing. Then I got a call from John that he’d been rushed to the hospital. He just received a call from the doctor and he was told he had stage four cancer. It was the moment in my life, where my entire world just collapsed. This was out of left field and there was so much heartbreak and fear.
So oncome, the surgeries and the chemo rounds and then one day, he went up for a nap. When he came down a few hours later he said, “I think I died. I saw the white light. There was a big glowing light. And I’m back, because I have something to do.” John didn’t know what it was but he was absolutely changed from that moment on. He had this profound near death experience and with it a renewed purpose in life. So he went traveling because he didn’t know what it was he was supposed to be doing here.
During his travels, he noticed that there was a lot of a lot of mention about farmers committing suicide. What was happening around then was that the rain belt had shifted from the breadbasket of Australia. So this was natural rain that farmers used so they didn’t need irrigation. Now their crops were being destroyed and the farmers were giving up. John came back and he just started tinkering and started cutting holes in pots. I had no idea, I thought he’d lost his mind. John learned how to write his own patents and he developed all kinds of different systems: water reduction systems for agriculture.
We were ready to start manufacturing when John said,”We can get these units on the shelves at the big box stores, but I don’t feel that’s what I was called to do. I feel like I need to give this away to the world and to people that really need our help. I want to find a way to help them and give it away to them. If we can give somebody the tools that they need to have a productive farm, then they won’t need help anymore. That is how we started.
Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?
Siobhan Shaw: We received our nonprofit status on December 24th, 2019 and just months later the world shut down. So that was a challenge. We were just getting started. Like all nonprofits, funding is always a challenge.
Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?
Siobhan Shaw: I think John keeps me going. And then the fact that we both grew up in rural communities, we know what hard work is.
Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?
Siobhan Shaw: We’ve grown and given away over 100,000 pounds of produce to local food banks. We will never know the impact from the people who received that food. We do see an impact with the community of volunteers who work on the farm with us.
In addition to our work here in Arizona, we partner with other nonprofits in communities around the United States, in the Caribbean, and Africa. These are three areas that really need our help. So we have about 30 partnerships and we’re working to write grants to help us give these people sustainable systems from The Crop Circle Farm and Garden Systems.
Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?
Siobhan Shaw: I don’t think when we had the idea of Growing to Give that we’d really thought about anything other than we just want to free people from hunger around the world. I guess that was the big idea, right? That was the moonshot.
Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?
Siobhan Shaw: That you can turn adversity into opportunity. That’s beautiful opportunity for community. Because it’s not about you. There are lots of people who are self-serving. It was all about me and then life changed for me and for John, too. We went from things being all about us, to what can we do to serve? How can we help? You know, and so we transformed. It’s taking that negative and transmuting it. So even if any negativity comes into your life, look at it as a divine moment. You can transmute that negativity into positive, life affirming opportunities that help everybody.
I just want to leave you with something John told me when he was really close to death. He looked at me and said,” Love is the only thing you take with you and the best thing you leave behind.”
CHARITY MATTERS.
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I was recently scrolling through Facebook and saw my cousin’s post. He was visiting Kalamazoo where his mother and mine grew up. In his post he shared this picture of my grandmother pouring coffee at her restaurant. This image really got me thinking about the women who came before me. I can not think about these incredibly strong women without thinking of all the challenges their lives presented and how they faced them. The old adage of what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger comes to mind.
My grandmother, Dorthy, was my mom’s mother. She was widowed with four children at age thirty-five in 1947 in Kalamazoo, Michigan. My grandfather had been a well known race car driver and was killed in a racing accident. How did a widow in the late 1940s support four children? My grandmother was incredibly smart but she was also a very good cook. So she used the skills she had, rolled up her sleeves and opened a restaraunt. I have no idea the struggles she had to endure or the details. Seeing this picture makes me think of all she had to juggle as a single parent of four.
My great grandmother, Dorthy’s mother-in -law, lived next door. While mother and daughter in law relationships tend to be sticky, as this one was, my great grandmother jumped into help. My great grandmother was the antiques buyer for Marshall Field Department stores. When I think about my great grandmother’s career in the forties and fifties, as a woman, it is also beyond inspiring. My great grandmother was very active in raising my mom and her three other grandchildren.
My mother was famous for telling my sisters and I almost daily, “Life is tough, toughen up!” I know my mom witnessed the women in her life struggle and overcome. I watched my mom with her challenges and she always came through with a smile and incredible joy. So often we are hyper focused on ourselves that we don’t take a moment to pause and look at who created the paths on which we walk.
I’m so grateful for this post that made me think about these amazing women. I wish I had my Grandma Fisk and Great grandmother Heid to know more about their lives, their struggles and their joy. They shaped my mom, who was hard working, kind and always joyful. I am beyond grateful for the strong women who blazed the trail for me and my sisters. My mom was right, life is tough but each hurdle we overcome with grace makes us stronger and ready for the next one. If we can work hard, have a heartful of gratitude then we are incredibly blessed.
CHARITY MATTERS.
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I have never run a marathon or even a 5k. I have, however, been a runner for most of my life. Maybe a jogger, I’m not sure of the difference but I have always liked to run. For decades I would run a few miles a few times a week. In recent years, I have done much more hiking and walking and a lot less running. I have to say that writing this book feels like running.
Getting started my legs felt like cement and the writing process was painfully slow. Whether you are running or writing, starting is always the hardest part of anything new we take on. Starting the book in January was daunting and filled with self doubt, stress, and deadlines that I was unsure I would make. Each new page felt uncertain and tentative. I have never heard my “negative Nancy” so loud in my head before. Usually I can keep her quiet but when the book began Nancy really ran on about how I couldn’t do this. Half of my energy was used silencing her never ending loop in my head.
After a while, my footing became steady and that negative voice slowly drifted away. Little by little my pace picked up, my confidence increased and I was keeping pace with the publisher’s deadlines. There were moments when I felt like a real runner again hitting my stride. Never fast but slowly and steadily making each mark, until I didn’t. I missed two deadlines. Not by too much, but it felt like a huge personal setback. The mental piece of starting again when you feel like you have fallen was much harder than I anticipated. Picking yourself up again and taking just one step forward was not easy, but I did. Each time I was proud of myself for moving ahead.
Now, as I am rounding the corner and see the finish line after literally just completing Chapter 11! I am on the home stretch, one chapter to go. So close to the finish I can practically see it! It is so crazy to fathom that when I began I didn’t know how long it was going to take me to get to my destination. Making the time to fit this book into my life has been a huge challenge. I’m so grateful to all of you with your patience as I have juggled the nonprofit, the podcast, this blog and the book in addition to life. It hasn’t been easy but like all challenges the reward comes from the hard work put into it.
Instead of sharing the final podcast for Season Seven, I am going to keep running towards that finish line and Chapter 12. My goal is to finish before the 4th of July and then finish Season Seven of the podcast the week after. Then another week of camp and a little break to catch my breath. Hoping to launch Season 8 of the podcast in August. Whew! So much to do and to look forward too. Thank you all for standing on the sidelines and cheering me on. So grateful for each of you and the movement we are creating together in making our world a better place.
CHARITY MATTERS.
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Friday marks the first official beginning of summer. Each year over six million American children participate in some sort of day or overnight camp each year. Many of these camps are nonprofit organizations. Camp is a summer ritual for many and for other young students an opportunity for reinvention. To show up without past labels, to be at a place where no one knows who you are but who they see. That reinvention also allows children to feel great about themselves, after being away from home and independent for a few days or weeks. This generation is connected via devices but not authentically connected and camp gives these students a place to unplug and actually make real authentic connections.
As many of you know, I did not go to camp as a child but my day job is running anon-profit youth leadership organization, which also has a summer camp program. We have incredible high school and college students volunteering to serve as camp counselors and mentors. Many counselors are alumni of our program and want to give back to an organization that changed their lives. Students teaching students to be the best of themselves. Showing one another respect, how to learn from different opinions, and how to work together towards a resolution. Ultimately, teaching students how to lead.
Tomorrow, I will happily be greeting hundreds of smiling faces as our 6th, 7th, and 8th graders arrive with their nervous parents. For some, it will be their first time away from home. It is such a great feeling to bring everyone together. There is no greater joy than knowing that you are part of something bigger than yourself and that your work makes a difference. This video below from one of our students a few years back, pretty much says it all.
Nothing brings greater joy than planting the seeds of compassion in these incredible students year after year. When the world seems to get a bit crazier, these students give me hope. I can’t help believe that our children will be better than we were, they will learn, listen, come together to lead us all. These children are our hope. As one of our students said, “It is an eyeopener to learn that you can do something to change the world...”
Charity Matters.
YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER.
Many of us grew up with the childhood slogan of, ” Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me.” Hundreds of years later we now know that they actually can. Words can cause long lasting scars on our children as nonprofit founder, Jessica Bondy shares with us with today’s inspirational conversation about the power of our words. Join us for an enlightening discussion from across the pond about this amazing new nonprofit, Words Matter.
Here are a few highlights from our conversation:
Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Words Matter does?
Jessica Bondy: Words Matteris the first organization in the world focused solely on addressing the issue of verbal abuse of children by adults. It is so pervasive, it goes so unnoticed and not properly recognized. Yet it affects two in five children. And of that two in five children over half experienced verbal abuse by adults weekly, and one in turn every single day of their lives. Hearing words to blame, shame, belittle, criticize, and it’s not just shouting and screaming, it can be quite insidious, and subtle.
And I think that the thing that is most concerning about childhood verbal abuse by adults, is the life long damage it can do to children. Because words matter. They stick, they last a lifetime. They shape who we are and who we become. So we are on a mission to end verbal abuse of children by adults.
Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Words Matter?
Jessica Bondy: I set it up having spent decades in communication, and working for some of the biggest brands in the world Samsung, British Airways, FedEx, Procter and Gamble, working as director and MD of some big firms and then setting up my own agency. I also coached and mentored a lot of young people helping them realize their potential. I did a course all about women finding their voices and speaking up and I had a eureka moment. This eureka moment came on when we were given a topic to talk about with this group of women all on zoom from around the world. The topic was if you are going to die in the next six months, what do you want your legacy to be?
This thing came from me out of nowhere. And I said, “If I’m going to die in the next six months, I don’t want my legacy to be that I am a good aunt. I don’t want my legacy being that I’m a communication specialist. And I don’t want my legacy being that I coach and mentor young people to help realize their potential.” I don’t want it to be on the good old, I’m a communication specialist, or mentor young people, even though all of those things don’t too many people would be hugely worthwhile and satisfied, right? I looked down the barrel of the camera on my Zoom computer. And I said, “If I’m going to die in the next six months, I want to end verbal abuse of children by adults, because words matter.”
Wow. And I said this, because of my own lived experience and was getting so locked in my head. So many of the people I coached had been so impacted by what they’d heard when they were growing up.
I think what’s so fascinating with what I’m doing now, and Words Matter, it kind of all makes sense. Because there I was communicating on behalf of businesses and brands, then I was helping young people communicate, and market themselves. Now I feel I’m almost the voice of children say, enough is enough words matter. I feel it is my purpose, I strongly believe that the only reason I’m on this planet is to do this thing. I just don’t want it to be that way for the next generations and generations to come.
Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?
Jessica Bondy: I think part of the challenge is when you believe something incredibly passionate yourself, and there are people that don’t necessarily believe in what your cause is. And I found there’s a real dichotomy of people that get it. I’ve had people who’ve literally burst into tears and said, Oh, gosh, I haven’t spoken to my father since I was 14. It’s so brilliant, you’re doing something about this.
I think the other very challenging thing, given the environment we are in today is fundraising is very, very hard. Because particularly if you’re a new charity, because so many funders want to be reassured that you’re going to succeed. And if you’re new and different, it’s hard. When I ran my own agency, and people were buying the services they were getting something in return. Philanthropy is very, very different. People are doing it because they believe in your cause. They believe that you’re gonna make a difference in the world.
Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?
Jessica Bondy: I think what fuels me is an absolute passion and belief in the need for this to happen in the world. Actually, knowing what I’m doing is changing people’s behavior. So that fuels me knowing that we can make a difference.
I think the other thing that fuels me is this incredible network of experts, supporters, and my fellow trustees, who have that belief, that you’ve cracked so many nuts, you’ll be able to crack this. I feel like I’ve kind of got almost a rocket of support underneath me to try and make it a success.
Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?
Jessica Bondy: September 2023, our website went live. We released the findings of our children survey and the most helpful and hurtful words that children said. We have three pillars, research and what we see is in terms of delivering outcomes, and outputs with data validation of the scale and impact. Then the next pillar is about awareness. And that’s trying to change perception and increase understanding and awareness.
Then the other thing we’re developing is training, education and information. We developed some resources on how to talk to children, from adults, for parents, for teachers, those with lived experience. We had the first international conference on childhood verbal abuse with University College London and the World Health Organization, we had over 1300 people registered to attend and actually 98% said it had made them they’d found it useful, and they would apply the information to their learning to their jobs. Over 90% said it would change their own their own behavior.
It’s called Words Matter, impact and prevention of childhood verbal abuse. So we’ve developed this program, we’re piloting it. Hopefully, it’ll be extended through our network of partners. So we’ve got a number of different leading charities supporting our mission, who are service providers, and we’re hoping to do the training through them and their networks.
Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?
Jessica Bondy: if I could dream, any dream it would be that in everybody’s public consciousness, they would think about, be aware of, and acknowledge the harm that words adults say to children can have. They don’t understand it. What I think is so interesting is, as soon as you ask adults themselves to think about what they remember, when they were a child, so many, the vast vast majority can remember what was said to them that built them up. And what and who said it to them that knocked them down. But they don’t somehow apply it to their own lives when they are an adult. Right, that kind of disconnect. So I’d like widespread acknowledgement of it.
Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?
Jessica Bondy: So often in life one tries to mold oneself into something to be liked, approved or understood by someone and it just it never feels comfortable. One should surround oneself with radiators, not drains.
Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?
Jessica Bondy: I’m somebody that is a survivor. I think I’m quite a resilient person. And resilience is so important. I just think it’s about somehow dusting yourself off if you have a knock back. It’s not easy to do. People who experienced verbal abuse or any form of abuse is that you just need one or two people in your life that really build a venue that really believe in you that you can talk to, and get that support for.
We all know it’s so important to have that connection and support from a very, very young age. I’ve had a few people in my life who I feel have really been there for me and who really believed in me. At the end of the day, we all want to be seen and heard, for who we are and valued for who we are.
CHARITY MATTERS.
YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:
I hope everyone has had a great week and are counting down to the long weekend ahead. I wanted to thank all of you who helped with the book naming survey, we are still narrowing it down but definitely getting closer! So thank you to all who voted, reached out and shared ideas. So grateful to you all. I promise to let you know once we have an official title.
Since our last book update, I had missed my April 30th book deadline and was more than a little stressed. I picked up my pace and kicked things into high gear Mother’s Day weekend. As a result, I am thrilled to report that I finished Chapter 6. Then I wrote the entire Chapter 7 and am now finishing Chapter 8. It feels great to be back in the race. Definitely feeling more secure about being past the halfway mark and heading towards the 12 Chapter home stretch in July.
Someone recently asked me, “Why are you writing this book?” My immediate answer was that I am writing it for myself, which is true. I am stretching myself and doing something I have always wanted to do and something I wasn’t sure I could do. Each chapter I prove to myself that I can. We all have a purpose on this earth and I believe that I was put here to help the helpers and to amplify their voices in any way that I can. This book helps that mission and will hopefully help the helpers and teach people that when you help others you end up helping yourself, your community and your world.
As a messanger of service, I am always looking for new ways to amplify these stories of modern day heroes. We started with the blog over a decade ago and then added the podcast. It turns out that so many people listen to their podcast on Youtube, who knew? I am thrilled to share that our podcast is now available on YouTube.
So if you like reading our interviews and articles here via email every week that is great. If listening to our Charity Matters podcast while you drive into work is how you like your content then that is terrific too. Now for those of you that love YouTube, we will be there for you hear our interviews. Lastly, for our book lovers our book will be out October 1st.
Thank you for being a part of this movement for believing that people are good and for helping to amplify these stories of real angels on earth. Together we all make a difference one small act of kindness at a time.
CHARITY MATTERS.
YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:
I need your help. Having never written a book, I thought that the title would just come to me somewhat like naming a baby. Like pregnancy you kind of figure things out as you go, you think you all this time to come up with a name. Afterall you have almost nine months, in the case of the book I have eight. The draft is due at the end of July. Just for a reference we didn’t have a name for our youngest son. The night before he was born we went to our favorite restaurant and the bartender, a friend of ours, asked us what the baby’s name was going to be? We didn’t have an answer, so he named the baby Ford. True story. So if this is any indicator, well I might need the bartender’s help too!
At our last update, I was having a really hard time starting. My procrastination skills were beyond impressive. When my husband left for a boy’s weekend, I was sure I was going to at least bust out a chapter. Instead, I headed to Target buying organizing containers and organized under my kitchen and bathroom sinks. Who does that? That’s how hard it was to start. I equate it to training for a marathon, which of course I have never done either. From what I hear, you have to start out slow and little by little your pace picks up.
Believe it or not that is exactly what’s been happening. The publisher gave me three months to get the first three chapters done. I was incredibly proud when I turned them in two weeks early, despite all the procrastination. I thought I had found a rhythm and so I rewarded myself with two weeks off after submission. In hindsight, that was probably not a great call on my part.
The reason that wasn’t a great idea is that our next publisher “check-in” my darling publisher, Michael said, “Ok, great that the first three are in but now we need chapters 4-6 and the title by the end of April.” Wait, whaaat? How did I have three months for three chapters and then one month for three chapters?’ Sweet Michael said, “That most authors begin to hit their stride by the middle of writing.” Since I’m not officially in the middle I am waiting for that moment to just take off. I am, however, happy to report that it is the third week of April as I write this post and I am starting chapter six and might, just might make my deadline….with one exception, the title.
When the initial panic ensued on the title, I thought who can I possibly ask for help? Who understands what I am writing about? Then I realized that you do! You have been following my crazy journey for over twelve years. You know my story of loss, of starting a nonprofit with a group of friends and my mission to help the helpers by amplifying the amazing nonprofit founders’ voices and work.
The book is my story of stumbling into this work after the loss of my mom. The lessons learned from loss and service and even more the lessons learned from the hundreds of interviews I’ve done this past decade, the ones you read each week. The thesis is that service is the silver bullet. If you want to heal yourself, your family, your community and your world then do something for someone else. It’s pretty simple. The untitled book is a little inspiration and a little self help.
I like to think of Charity Matters as a patchwork of stories and the book will be the quilt where they all come together. More than a few people have asked why not just call the book Charity Matters? My answer is that I wouldn’t buy a book called that. Would you? However, I do think you can give the book a short title and then as the byline say: Why Charity Matters.
We made it easy with a poll you can click hereand take the survey and make sure to pick one choice to get to page three to suggest your own idea. So here are a few of the tentative titles and I would be beyond grateful for any suggestions you may have or your vote. My list is even longer and maybe your idea is even better?
How to become your own hero- Changing your world and ours
Help yourself by Helping others
We before me: Why Charity Matters
The healing lessons of helping
The secret of living is giving
Helping is Healing
If it wasn’t for you, there wouldn’t be a Charity Matters with thousands of followers and subscribers. Let me know what you think? And thank you for going on this journey with me and for helping us get the word out that there is SO much good in our world if we just look.
CHARITY MATTERS.
YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:
Did you know that there are over 13 million children in the United States who live with hunger? One in five children does not know where or if their next meal will come. Those facts are shocking to anyone who hears them. However, it is the rare person or people who actually act when hearing those numbers. Today’s guests not only experience food insecurity they have acted to create a nonprofit called Filling In Blanks.
Tina Kramer (left) and Shawnee Knight (right) Founders of Filling In the Blanks
Join us for an inspirational conversations about two next door neighbors who are changing lives and the face of hunger.
Here are a few highlights from our conversation:
Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Filling In the Blanks does?
Tina Kramer: Shana and I started Filling In the Blanks 11 years ago. And what we do is we provide food on the weekends to children that are struggling with food insecurity. So we provide a bag of food for the kids ages preschool through high school, that receive meals during the week at school, but don’t have anything over the weekend. So we’re covering that weekend meal gap.
Charity Matters: Did Either of you grow up in families that were very involved in their communities?
Shawnee Knight: My family was always thoughtful of other people, but we didn’t do a lot in terms of being out in the community as much as Tina and I are now. I grew up in a single family household and so I kind of understood. I was on the free and reduced lunch and so I understand the pressures that these families are facing. I think that really was kind of one of my main motivating factors for starting Filling In The Blanks. Being in Fairfield County, CT there’s so many different volunteer opportunities and ways to give back.
Tina Kramer: I grew up in a similar household as Shawnee with a single mom who works all the time. My grandmother pretty much raised me. So there wasn’t really an opportunity to give back to the community at that point in time. When we moved to Connecticut, there are so many volunteer opportunities and that’s where I really learned about volunteering. We decided that we wanted to do something together and that’s how we founded it Filling in the Blanks.
Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Filling In the Blanks?
Shawnee Knight: We were riding with a friend into the city, and we were just talking about sports and our kids. And my friend was saying,” The other students on the opposing team don’t often have snacks. So they would bring snacks for the other team.” I was kind of like,” Wait a minute. There’s kids in Fairfield County that don’t have food. Like how I don’t understand that? That can’t be possible. Look at where we live?”
I think Tina and I were at the age where our kids were getting a little bit older. So we were both trying to find something to do, we were next door neighbors. We did some research and learned that there really are food insecure children in our community. And for us, the thought of a kid going without food is just shameful. It’s just wrong.
Tina Kramer: So we saw an article in a magazine about a nonprofit that was a national organization that provided food on the weekends to children. So we became program coordinators. That was our first step and we did the fundraising. We did all the purchasing, but the national organization was more of the parent company.
We would give them our fundraising efforts and they would reimburse us. And we are very type A, we are very gung ho about projects we work on. We decided after probably two or three weeks to use the information from the national organization structure on how to run a nonprofit because neither one of us had ever run a company or any kind of nonprofit before. So that was our stepping stone to the blank.
So we learned how to incorporate our trademark, our logo, articles of incorporation and bylaws. We surround ourselves with good people to help us structure all these things. We started packing bags in my house for 50 kids. We’re tying grocery bags, going to the dollar stores, Costco and loading our Suburbans up which we’re dragging on the floor. And we just learned as we went, and it was so very grassroots in the beginning.
Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?
Shawnee Knight: I think definitely finding food suppliers and finding families. and reaching more families. We needed to get a warehouse because we had outgrown Tina’s living room. We had too many kids, and you have to store these bags. We just needed more of a structure for that. And so I think there were challenges, just in doing and getting things done. Realizing people don’t get things done as quickly as we wanted them to get done.
Some of the biggest challenges we face now are reaching more parents. There’s definitely still a lot of parents who don’t know about us and our services.. And I think procuring food, and food costs rising because we purchase all of our food. So we’re fundraising to buy food and with food costs going up, we have to fundraise even more.
Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?
Tina Kramer: I don’t think we mentioned this earlier but Shawnee and I are both volunteers. We don’t get paid to run Filling in the Blanks. We have a real desire to help the kids because we both at some point in our lives dealt with food insecurity, one of us in our childhood, the other in our adult life. That really fuels us because we know what these parents are struggling with, and how hard it is. Just to wonder, can I feed my child today? Or do I have to pay the electric bill? So it’s really ingrained in who we are.
We have a great staff that surrounds us and a great group of volunteers. We have a leadership committee of about 10 people, mainly women. Then we have 11 full time employees that really help with the day to day. Besides the bags were packing, we have 7000 volunteers come through our doors on a yearly basis. Wow. So it’s not just Shawnee and I, and our desire, it’s our community. We’re all lifting up our community and the surrounding communities. And that’s really what fuels us.
Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been?
Shawnee Knight: We do a lot of surveys, to the families, the children, parents, the social workers and teachers at the schools. So we’re able to measure some of those outcomes for students. Then we track the number of meals and we’ve served over 3 million meals. Every week we have 7500 kids that get our weekend meal bags. We’ve launched our Mobile Food Pantry, fresh food on the move. We’ve been distributing about 20,000 pounds of food at each site, which they operate twice a month.
We’ve partnered with Stanford Health to provide various health and wellness wraparound services, so we’re able to see how many people they register for or how many flu shots they gave out. It is really hard because we don’t have access to kids grades, so it’s hard to measure that. But we do measure things like the teacher saying that the child is less disruptive in class.. We’ve had a teacher tell us a story of this. One child she had that just was out of sorts at school and she kind of made him in charge of helping her with the backpack club as they call it, which is when they get their bags. And she said, that she noticed a change in his personality and his self confidence was improved. So we hear little antidote or things like that. Then from our pre-programmed surveys and post-program surveys, we see an increase in happiness or of the child’s well being.
Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?
Tina Kramer: It’s a simple concept that everyone should have access to food and healthy food items. Our volunteers are little kids to adults. We make sure that we can create volunteer opportunities for them to create an impact within Filling in The Blanks.. We’ve created snack bag programs, in addition to our regular weekend meal program. So the younger kids can have a packing event at their home and pack little snacks in a little brown bag that gets distributed to the kids too. So we’re trying to make sure that our volunteers feel the impact that they are creating.
As Shawnee mentioned, we just started a mobile pantry back in October, and we’re serving 1000s of families through that initiative. Through that we’re able to communicate directly to the families and the parents. They tell us the impact that the 50,000 pounds of food they get at the mobile pantry has on their family. Many turned around and now want to know how they can volunteer with us, and how they can give back and how they can help. And that’s just so rewarding. It comes full circle.
Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?
Shawnee Knight: For us to be out of business.
Tina Kramer: This year alone we will serve over a million meals and the need is not not going away. We’ll probably serve about 10,000 kids this year, every weekend. We created a year round program for all. Our big dream is potentially it’s on the back burner but I’ll put it out there. We would like to franchise to other states or communities, or do some drop shipping/fulfillment centers to have food delivered directly to the schools. We would take away the need for additional trucks and drivers. We’re trying to figure out how do we replicate or duplicate our program outside of our like immediate area.
Charity Matters: Do you have a Phrase or Motto that you live by?
Tina Kramer:One of our board members always said, “If you can, you should.” And that kind of really encompasses Filling in the Blanks. Because really, anyone, a little kid to a senior citizen can make a difference here, it’s packing the bag, spreading the word, liking something on social media, it doesn’t have to be dollars, it could just not just it can be your time, even if it’s five minutes.
Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?
Shawnee Knight: I think so. I think we were nervous when we first started this. We didn’t know what to expect. You never know how much pressure you can take or how much weight your shoulders can hold. So I think we’ve grown a lot in that sense. I mean, we’re running a really big nonprofit with a big operating budget and expenses. You never know how much of that stress you can take and I think we’ve learned to stomach quite a bit of it.
Tina Kramer: We’re the perfect ying and yang. I think it’s given me a lot more confidence than I had before. I never thought I could run my own business and didn’t know how to read a spreadsheet. And now we’re dealing like Shawnee said, with a multimillion dollar budget. It’s given me confidence in who I am, not only here, but in normal life and at home. It’s just been a great learning experience over the past 11 years.
Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?
Tina Kramer: That people are good. And they want to do good. I come from nothing and I’m not used to being encompassed or embraced by our community. This community that we’ve created together, really has shown me how good people are and how they’re always willing to help. It’s just a beautiful thing.
Shawnee Knight: If you build it, they will come.
CHARITY MATTERS.
YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:
You may remember that in February I went to an incredible event hosted by the publisher of my upcoming book. At that event, I was thrilled to finally meet Cindy Witteman in person. Cindy is the nonprofit founder of Driving Single Parents. We had already connected in so many ways so it was a treat to be in person together. In addition to being a nonprofit founder, Cindy has already written a number of books, hosts a TV show called the Little Give and is now launching a magazine called FORCE.There is no better word to describe my new friend than a serious force.
I was incredibly flattered when Cindy asked me to write about my thoughts on “force” for her premiere issue. Even more exciting, is the fact that Cindy has asked me to become a regular columnist for the magazine contributing monthly and having a Charity Matters column. FORCEMagazine will be available in 13 countries and sold in over 10,000 retailers, so you can imagine how excited I am! For the first issue, I was asked to write in third person which isn’t my usual voice and was actually difficult becaise I am so comfortable talking to you in first person. Here is a little of what I shared about what it means to become a FORCE for good.
In a world often marked by individual pursuits and ambitions, there exists a powerful force—the act of giving back. It’s a force that transcends personal boundaries, offering the potential to create lasting positive impacts. The ability to harness one’s own personal force for good, by serving others through involvement with nonprofits and charities, becomes a formidable tool in shaping a better world.
Within each of us resides an innate force—a unique blend of skills, resources, and passion. While this force can certainly be directed towards personal gain, its true potential lies in its capacity to contribute to the well-being of others. By recognizing and embracing this inherent power, one can become a force for good, driving positive change and making a meaningful difference in the lives of those less fortunate.
In the United States alone, there are approximately 1.6 million nonprofit organizations, each serving as a powerful vehicle for channeling personal force towards societal betterment. These nonprofits were all founded by individuals who recognized a problem and were determined to find a solution. They are remarkable individuals dedicated to addressing various social, environmental, and humanitarian issues. Each nonprofit founder is a living example of being a force for good. By understanding the impact of nonprofits, we can strategically engage with these organizations to amplify their force for good and our own.
One poignant example of the transformative power of collective giving is Meals on Wheels. Founded by Enid Borden and supported by a volunteer army of 2 million, Meals on Wheels is the largest hunger-relief organization for senior citizens in the United States. Every day, they provide meals to over a million elderly individuals across the country. Enid Borden aptly summarizes the essence of giving back, stating, “The biggest problem we have is that there are many charities… So which one is more valuable than another? The answer is they’re all valuable, they’re all worthy, and they all need help. My message is just give. I always tell people: Once you give something back, whether it is a meal or something else, you’re hooked. It doesn’t pay monetarily, but it pays spiritually.”
While Meals on Wheels exemplifies the impact of large nonprofits, it’s important to recognize that every nonprofit started with one founder. The power of giving back extends beyond financial contributions or organizational affiliations; it encompasses individual efforts that, when combined, create a significant force for good. Volunteering time, skills, or expertise to local charities or community initiatives amplifies the impact on a smaller scale but with no less significance.
Charities, regardless of size, often rely on the dedication of community members to address specific needs. Whether it’s assisting at a food bank, participating in neighborhood clean-ups, or mentoring youth, individuals contribute to improving their communities. The collective force of these small-scale efforts enhances the overall well-being of their communities.
Most nonprofit organizations benefit from individuals offering their specific skills and expertise. Professionals in fields such as marketing, legal services, or IT can provide valuable assistance to organizations that may lack these resources. By leveraging their unique skills, individuals become a force for good, enabling nonprofits to operate more efficiently and effectively. Organizations likewww.catchafire.org serve as terrific resources to connect skills to a nonprofit’s needs.
In harnessing the power of giving back, individuals become agents of positive change. Nonprofits and charities provide structured platforms for directing personal force towards addressing pressing societal issues. By contributing time, resources, or expertise to these organizations, individuals amplify their impact and collectively shape a better world.
When we acknowledge the inherent goodness in people, it becomes natural to want to be of service to them. By providing value to others, not only do we help them, but we also enrich ourselves. This cycle of giving and receiving fosters an upward spiral of positive energy and change, strengthening the force for good in the world.
This force for good resides within each of us, waiting to be unleashed. As individuals recognize their unique abilities and align them with the missions of nonprofits and charities, they not only improve the lives of others but also experience the profound fulfillment that comes from being a force for good.
CHARITY MATTERS.
YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT, IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:
