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Vacation, All I Ever Wanted….

Vacation all I ever wanted

When I was in high school I loved The Go-Gos. This week their song, “Vacation” is seriously stuck in my head and the reason being is that it is time for our family to get out of dodge for some much-needed rest and relaxation. We are not headed too far this trip but anyplace that gets you out of your routine, is more than far enough for me.

An open space with fresh air, little technology, my children and spouse without the demands of work. That is vacation. We all need them. Vacations don’t have to be to a glamorous destination or include an umbrella drink. My sons joke that we can turn any trip into a road trip whether we began in a car or fly to a foreign country….this time they just might be right.

When you look at back at your life and the memories that were created, my guess is that many of the good ones come from the trips that you took. Since we have one leaving the nest and time continues to zip by faster and faster, it becomes more important to stop, leave and just be with those you love.

When I return, I will be rested, renewed and ready to blog about amazing people who inspire me and gear up for the Youth Summer Leadership Program I run.

It is going to be an amazing summer…..once I start that vacation.

Charity Matters.

 

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Schools out for summer!

“In school, you’re taught a lesson and then given a test. In life, you’re given a test that teaches you a lesson.”

Tom Bodett

School's out for summer

It’s here! It’s here! Summertime is here!

No more homework, making lunches, studying or school. Phew.

Whether a student, a teacher or a parent there is simply something wonderful that happens once school is out.

A weight is lifted, the load a little lighter and the excitement of a relaxing summer looms ahead.

A time to slow down, relax and enjoy.

Happy Summer!

Charity Matters.

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

A time for reflection

A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.”

Author Unknown

birthday-candle-1024x753

Today is my 48th birthday. And as the years roll by each one becomes a time for reflection. Birthdays are times to connect with those you love, celebrate all the amazing blessings in your life and a moment to pause and think about what happened last year and where you are heading next.

When I look at the past year, I see a whirlwind of events; celebrations, football games, holidays, school events, college applications and acceptance letters, proms and graduations. Oh, and my full-time job running a non-profit. More than anything, I see blessings of time spent with people I love.

So as I begin to think about what this next year will bring, with the nest a little emptier, I can only hope for a renewed sense of purpose, clarity and gratitude. Age is simply a number but the greatest gift one can give the world is a life well lived.

That is exactly what I intend to keep doing.

Charity Matters.

 

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

This is it.

You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world.”

Tom Brokaw

photo via: baltimore sun
photo via: baltimore sun

Tomorrow is the big day, Graduation Day. For 18 years of guiding, homework, making lunches, driving and all of the work that goes into being a parent….this is it. Is it over? No. Is it a parental payday? Maybe. To me it is simply another milestone. His first smile, first step, learning to ride his bike, then his driver’s license and now to use those same wheels to head off to college. It is a milestone and like all great milestones it is a celebration of achievement. It is a time to be in the moment with all of the people who helped us get to this moment.

Just like the first smile, the first steps and the first pedal strokes there were more. This will not be the last milestone or celebration of achievement. Like all the wonderful accomplishments, I will cheer, smile, cry and beam with pride. Although my son has earned this moment, it is one for all of us to celebrate.

He can change the world tomorrow. Today his smile is more than enough.

Charity Matters.

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

To the graduate

photo via: 12newsnow
photo via: 12newsnow

Since I have brought all of you along for this journey, it seems only fitting that we have inspiring closing remarks, as all graduations do. Charity Matters has nothing to do with graduation you say? Yes, you have a point. However, Charity Matters is about making a difference, food for thought, a little nourishment for the soul. In looking for that, I came across this. A graduation speech viewed by millions, entitled, “You are not special.”

Perhaps the title is deceiving but the message is outstanding. Like all great commencement speeches it is full of inspiring comments about “dreaming big, working hard, get up, get out, explore.” But the overall message (spoiler alert here) is that “selflessness is the best thing you can do for yourself.”

So whether or not you watched all twelve minutes, like millions have, or simply skipped to the end…congratulations. You walked away with the message that selflessness is the best thing you can do for yourself. As a result, you walked away a little bit better and wiser, than when you arrived, just like our graduates. So, congratulations to you. As our speaker so eloquently shared, “Wisdom is the chief element of happiness.”

Wiser and selflessness, I feel happier already.

Charity Matters.

 

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

A gift.

photo via: goredfoxes.com
photo via: goredfoxes.com

Education is on my mind. It usually is, but this week especially. I have been thinking about how education shapes, molds and can transform a life. When this video was sent to me, I knew it was not by coincidence. It is truly one of the most inspiring beautiful stories I have ever shared. It is a story of education, hope and purpose.

This Verbum Dei graduate from Watts, Caylin Moore, shares his journey from poverty to college and now as the recipient of the Fulbright scholarship. If ever the expression dream big fits, it is here. I was only going to watch 2 minutes but was so enthralled by this young man’s message of hope I watched it all. Caylin, his story and message are a gift.

 

Caylin’s message of who he plays football for, his purpose, his struggles and his faith are humbling. This young man is a walking example of what the gift of an education and dreaming big can accomplish…..anything.

Charity Matters.

 

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Make your bed

make your bed, Bill McRaven

As we get ready for Memorial Day this weekend and as graduations loom for many, I thought that Admiral Bill McRaven’s recent Commencement address was particularly fitting. Admiral McRaven is a 36 year old Navy SEAL veteran and a Navy four star who has avoided the spotlight successfully. Once his infamous squadron, known as SEAL Team Six, killed Osama bin Laden the attention was unavoidable. Despite Admiral McRaven’s adventures, his wisdom is a treat and as he so wisely states, “It all begins with simply making your bed.”

If you give your self one gift this weekend make it this.

God bless our SEALS, this great country and for goodness sakes, just make your bed.

Happy Memorial Day Weekend Everyone!

Charity Matters.

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I think we need a timeout

Hunter and Henry timeout

I think I want to call for a timeout. Stop the clock, take a moment, regroup and simply stop time. It is going way too fast.  On friday our two oldest sons went to their Junior and Senior prom, a great night, a happy time filled with all the fun and all the standard trimmings. Beautiful girls, handsome young men in their tuxedos, corsages and boutonnières and the parental paparazzi. It was a happy, fun and festive occasion. This seems like a good place to stop the clock and call a timeout.

It feels like yesterday, I was calling the timeouts. When the boys were naughty (which was an hourly occurrence) they were placed in a “timeout.” They had a timeout routine, a timeout corner to sit alone, the clock set to have time to think about their behavior, while trying not to wiggle and fidget. As the years passed, the timeouts were no longer determined by me but rather reserved for their baseball, football and lacrosse coaches. I really should have brought a whistle into the home at an earlier age, it might have helped to continue the timeout tradition.

Now as we are just a few weeks from high school graduation, the college deposits are in, the orientation booked and in this pivotal time of celebration and joy, I want a timeout. Every occasion is happier than the next. Each day is full of celebrations, happy news and life is action packed. It is as if there is a joy overload to offset the loss that is pending.

So, without a whistle or a timeout corner, I will try my very best to take my own timeout. To stop in a crowded room and smile at my handsome boys as if time had stopped. To give them hugs from my tippy toes instead of the other way around. Laugh at their jokes, beam every time they say “love you mom” and know that we have raised incredible young men. Timeout to be proud of them and all they continue to be. Timeout to feel the love and continue to let go.

 

Charity Matters.

 

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Simply No words

sangabriel mountains

In almost five years of blogging, I have rarely re-posted previous work. Last Saturday, I wrote a post about the Year of Magical thinking and loss. Little did I know that an earthquake of loss would hit our community within hours of writing it. Sadly, with a heavy heart, I am reposting this from a few years back…because there simply are no words…

 

Twelve years ago I had a phone call that changed my life, a car accident, a death and nothing was simply ever the same after that call. A dear friend just received that same call and so it all comes flooding back…the pain, the loss, the heart-break that feels like it will never end….it is simply too much. There are simply no words….

As I struggle with how to hold up my friend, I find myself thinking about loss and growth. I think many of us feel that growth comes in tiny layers added up over time and that each day’s journey gets us a little closer to inner-growth. I have a different theory.

I believe life is like an earthquakes where huge jolts cause cataclysmic shifts like tectonic plates to our souls. In nature these shifts result in mountains. Inside each of  us is a similar experience. When the rocking stops we somehow come out shifted. Our vision becomes clearer, we see what is important for the first time, we learn gratitude in everything and the growth is as monumental as a mountain. It is the growth of our soul.

When I sat down to write this week about soul, I had no idea how I would conclude. I certainly didn’t envision this, but as I struggle and question why? I know that why an earthquake has leveled a family, I can only pray that the shift will bring the strength, foundation, and the beauty of a mountain to each of them.

These are simply words, when there really are none…

Charity Matters.

 

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Because I’m Happy…

 

photo via: rock.rapgenius.com
photo via: rock.rapgenius.com

I have to confess, I adore Pharrell Williams song, “Because I’m happy” and when I saw these 25 insightful thoughts from Gurbaksh Chahal about being happy via Linkedin, I simply had to share them with you. I do not make a habit of sharing other people’s material but this was more than worth sharing.

Happy and Success people…

  1. They forget who they were and focus on who they want to be. If you don’t let go of your past then you won’t find your future.
  2. They are sure of themselves and stick to their guns. Uncertainty is the key component of failure.
  3. They are willing to admit when they are wrong. If you can’t accept that you’re wrong then there’s no room to learn.
  4. They surround themselves with those who are worthy. Your friends make you who you are.
  5. They allow unwarranted and hateful criticism to roll off their shoulders. You will always have haters — learn to ignore those that are just trolling.
  6. They accept constructive criticism. You aren’t always right; others may have a clearer perspective than yourself.
  7. They focus and act on what they believe is right and don’t act simply to please. If you’re constantly pleasing others then you won’t have time to please yourself.
  8. They see challenges as an opportunity to learn and to grow as individuals. If you’re never challenged then you’re never going to see the world from a different perspective.
  9. They are open-minded. There’s always another way to do it — a way that may very well be better.
  10. They are quick to adapt. If evolution has taught us anything, it’s this: those who adapt the fastest and most efficiently are those who survive.
  11. They do the right thing because it’s the right thing. Having moral standards and following them alleviates the chances of feeling guilt.
  12. They don’t complain. If the situation can’t be changed and you can’t avoid doing what you have to do, then there’s no reason to complain; it only weighs on your nerves.
  13. If they start something, they finish it. If you’re not going to finish what you started, then why bother starting in the first place?
  14. They exercise regularly. You are an animal and animals are made to move and to push their limits.
  15. They read regularly. It’s the quickest way to learn how the world works.
  16. They keep a well-balanced, nutritious diet. What you eat affects your body on a chemical level.
  17. They take risks. Fear is acceptable as long as you overcome it.
  18. They have no problem with saying “no.” Often at times, it’s the things and opportunities that you turn down that allow for success to manifest.
  19. They meditate and learn to control their breathing. Breathing is the link between our conscious and subconscious mind.
  20. They focus on the moment. Life can only be lived in the moment.
  21. They question convention. The way things are done isn’t always the best way to do things.
  22. They care for and want to give back to human kind. We are all related and all connected.
  23. They learn from others, their heroes and mentors. Having guidelines makes life easier.
  24. They learn from the mistakes of others before they make the mistakes themselves. History does not need to repeat itself.
  25. They respect others and expect respect in return. We are all equal and should all be treated kindly and respectfully.

Most importantly, they are happy. And, at the end of the day that’s what life is all about. Time. Energy. Moments. Live each breath counting those blessings.

I simply couldn’t have said it better myself!  What makes you happy?

Charity Matters.

 

Boston Marathon, One Year Later

Boston Marathon 1935

Today is the Boston Marathon. Thousands of runners will come from around the world to compete in this legendary sporting event, just as they have since 1897. Year after year, the originally named The American Marathon was always celebrated on Patriots Day. There has been much talk about this years marathon being different but upon deeper reflection, I think the age-old saying will hold true, “The more things change, the more things stay the same.”

Many things will stay the same, the marathon will continue to be hosted by the non-profit Boston Athletic Association and will raise over $12 million dollars supporting over 30 local charities, just as it always has. Over 500,000 spectators will continue to come out to watch the over 27,000 runners. Yet, this year will be different.

This year we will remember and honor the three lives that were lost last year, the lives that were shattered and the tragedy that touched us all. It is often hard to see the beauty that comes from loss and tragedy. Today that beauty will be everywhere…in every runner, every cheerleader and every Boston Strong t-shirt worn.  Today, it is not The Boston Marathon but once again the American Marathon as we come together as a nation, not just a city, to celebrate our unity, pride and compassion.

As Americans, we are reminded that in this patriotic city, on Patriots Day, that our forefathers were feisty, strong, resilient, and had the ability to unite and come together in good times and in bad. While some things may change, many things will remain the same this year in Boston.

Charity Matters.

 

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Believe in Good.

believe in good

I know I keep seeing it, am I the only one? The trend, the kindness, the shift? Good things happen around us every day and yet we somehow pass them by. I believe we collectively are beginning to take notice. If the corporate world is leveraging this “shift in goodness” to sell something, than it must really be happening.

This is one of the most beautiful ads I have ever seen….oxy moron….I don’t think so….simply proof of the shift.

 

And as it says, “In your life what is it that you desire most?” Believe in good.

 

Charity Matters.

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

My gift to the world

“You don’t raise heroes, you raise sons.  And if you treat them like sons, they’ll turn out to be heroes, even if it’s just in your own eyes.”

 ~Walter M. Schirra, Sr.

My gift to the world hunter

Yesterday was my first-born’s birthday. He will be heading off to college in a few months and some days its just so hard to believe that it is really happening. All these years of pouring blood sweat and tears into your children and just when they turn into super interesting, creative, fun and amazing people…well its time for them to leave.

I remember when my oldest was a toddler, a wise woman said to me, “He doesn’t belong to you, he belongs to the world.” I have truly never forgotten those words.

Our first-born was a “man for others” before he even knew what his school motto meant. I have watched him spend his summers and free time doing service, not by demand but by choice. I hope that wherever he lands his service to others never stops but continues to grow and evolve with him.

I know that this is his time and he is ready, but am I? Each week I talk about giving and now it is time to give my first born his wings. A ritual that mothers have done with their sons since the beginning of time and a heart wrenching right of passage. This is my ultimate gift.

I know a mother’s work is never done but as I reflect on how quickly the time has passed, I am reminded that he never belonged to me in the first place, but rather to world which he is about to enter.

Charity Matters.

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Being in the moment

being in the moment fordLast year I shared my Lenten resolution, which was to perform 40 random acts of kindness. I have to say that it was probably one of the most difficult challenges I have ever put myself through….mainly due to the word “random.” So, this year I thought I would focus on something simpler….or so I thought. My resolution for the next 29 days is to be present, in the moment.

I am a planner and planners are always looking ahead to whats next….who has time for the moment? The problem with that is that you are never in the now, as they say. Somehow my life is all about getting ready for whats coming. In this crazy world we live in, where jumbo jets go missing and life changes on a dime how can I deny myself being here right now?

Ten days into my resolution,  I now get off the cell phone when picking up my son at school and I am there with him..in the moment. I am trying to walk away from my computer at night to be present with my family. At the end of my life, I want to go out with no regrets. Many lessons learned from a lifetime of mistakes and missteps, but no regrets.

A life not being lived in the present is simply not living. When my time comes, I want to know that I lived every day to the fullest, did my best and leave this earth with a lifetime of moments.

Charity Matters.

Copyright © 2014 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.