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Ways to make a difference

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The Write Stuff

As I shared with you at the beginning of the year, I am writing a book. A lifetime goal, a dream, and a bucket list item for sure. Along with that dream comes the vulnerability, the fear, the procrastination and the reality of deadlines from publishers. All of it is new, all of it is exciting, terrifying, exhilarating  and a little overwhelming all at once.

I write to you every week and thought how difficult can this be? It can’t be that much harder. Believe it or not, it is. What is difficult is the voice in my head and the million new ways I have found to procrastinate. I don’t think I have procrastinated like this since college. It is the same feeling of an impending deadline that feels so far off and then you blink and its March and three chapters are due. Terror strikes, the brain freezes, panic sets in and then you have to get to work. You have no choice.

In January, I was walking with my girlfriend Sue and sharing some of these feelings. She turned to me and asked me the most beautiful question, “Do you want an accountability partner?” A resounding YES! was my answer. She then asked me what I needed to do first and by when. I went on to explain that if I could just have a detailed outline to write from by the third week in January, it would make me feel better. True to her word, she texted me, checked in and sure enough, I made my self imposed deadline to my new accountability partner. One item off the checklist down and just a book to go, no problem.

Next, I told myself once I attend my publisher’s event in mid February, then I will have a better sense of things. I did attend an amazing day where they hosted The Voices of 100 Women which is a documentary that they are filming and I am excited to be a part of, more on that later. The time with fellow women authors, many first timers like me, was amazing! I came home energized and ready to go. I wrote the forward and the first chapter and felt great.

Then life got in the way a little bit and rather than writing, I found myself listening to a podcast about writing a book. Next, I found myself joining writers groups to learn ways to create writing schedules. Simply another clever procrastination technique. I’m learning so many new ones it’s hard to know which one to use instead of doing my work. When I asked one of the amazing authors, Cindy Witteman, what she does when she is stuck. Cindy replied, ” I write a handwritten letter to the person I’m trying to talk too and I tell them my message in my handwritten note.”  The light bulb went off. By the way, you may remember Cindy from our recent podcast about Driving Single Parents and the nonprofit she founded. Once again, a nonprofit hero to the rescue! Cindy is in the photo above.

I have to confess that I am writing to you instead of working on the book right now but for the past twelve years we have done everything together. I am grateful that you are coming on this journey too. If a week goes by and you don’t hear from me, don’t worry, just know that I’m doing my work and making those deadlines!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

How to serve up community service

I get asked all the time, “How do I get my children involved in service?”  It is a question that has more than a few answers because it is a process and not always a simple answer.  I was so excited when my friend, author and college admissions expert Dr. Cynthia Colon, asked me to join her podcast to discuss the topic on her podcast Destination Youniversity about the topic. You can listen to the conversation below or share with a friend who has high school age students or anyone looking to volunteer and doesn’t know where to start.

Dr. Cynthia Colon and I met a decade ago when she was a high school principal after leaving her job as head of admissions at Vassar. During her years running high schools she watched many families being overwhelmed by the college admissions process and as a first generation college student in her own family, she decided to switch gears to help.

Since that time, she has authored two books on the process: Tips, Tales and Truths for Teens and Be Committed, Get Admitted. Cynthia is a dynamo who is on a mission to help families and students navigate the very challenging college admissions process. Today, Cynthia helps families, students one on one with their college applications and hosts workshops on the topic. If you are beginning the college search process definitly check out her website here.

Dr. Colon tells her families and students that one of the things that schools look for in applicants is volunteer and leadership experience.  So I loved sharing a few tips on where to begin with your teens. Finding your child’s gifts and interests and pursuing those in the nonprofit space. We also talked about a number of amazing resources for starting out your volunteering experience and the best way to maximize those opportunities for your child and the organization they are serving.

There are so many resources today to connect you or someone you know to a cause they care about. It is just about knowing a few great places to get started. Connecting people and causes is truly one of my favorite things to do, so I’m excited to share this conversation and hope you enjoy it as much as we did!

 

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Number Three to listen to in 2024!

Storytellers need to tell stories. In order for storytellers to be effective they need an audience….that’s where you come in. Every week for over a decade I write and share but I never really know who is reading this or listening. I know you are there but I don’t know your age or what country you live in. I’m just thrilled that you are here and that you continue to share our work. What matters to me is that we have organically found each other. People who care about making the world a better place and who believe in good.

In a world where data is everthing, to me it isn’t. Confession: numbers and analytics are not really my thing. Yes, I do realize that I should be studying them. Simply put I care more about you and the story and the people we meet. However, in an ironic twist of events I had a PR agency reach out to me recently and ask for all sorts of analytics about the blog and podcast. Truth be told, I was a little grumpy about it. Honestly, I hadn’t looked in a while so I went down the rabbit hole grudingly.

I did know how many thousands of blog subscribers we have, so that was good. The podcast, well I hadn’t looked in a while. Imagine my surprise when I start googling Charity Matters Podcast and I find this posting on FeedSpot. I was stunned to find that we were listed as the third top charity Podcast to listen to in 2024. Who knew? No, I didn’t pay them or even know about them. So that was a lovely surprise!

Here are few fun facts I learned about our podcast:

  • 70% female
  • 30%male
  • 30% are age 28-34
  • 30% are age 35-44
  • 20% are 23-27
  • 79% live in the United States
  • 12% live in the UK and the rest well, I’m not exactly sure
  • We grew our audience 91% last year…whoohoo!

One thing always leads to the next and here we are. I will keep caring more about you and the amazing heroes we meet and their stories. It is very nice to know that more and more people are caring too. That is how we change the world, one person, one story, one act of kindness at a time.

 

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

2024 the year ahead

Happy New Year! It’s that time of year when we catch our breath and begin to really think about what we want in the year ahead. I’m guessing that you have been pondering this, consciously or subconsciously, for the past week or so. I know I have. Honestly, just getting through the holidays and taking it all down felt like a victory. For some of us we are too tired to think about  what we want for the year ahead. If there is one thing I have learned over the years is that those list and intentions become real and it all starts with the dream.

My sons call me Dharma, like the old TV show Dharma and Greg. You know the one, where the kooky Dharma is all about manifesting and the universe. I have to admit that I do have a solid Dharma side to me. The reason isn’t just faith, although that is a part of it. The main reason is that I set goals and that I can begin to see myself making that happen. Some people think this is odd, some call it manifesting, I like to make plans and make them happen. Call it what you want. My oldest son and I were recently on a podcast called Is Manifesting Bullsh**?  discussing our differing views on making intentions.

Last year one of my New Year’s resolutions/intentions for 2023 was to write a book.  I talked about it all year and I didn’t do much about it. A number of my friends have written books and I talked to them about their writing process. I listened to a few podcasts on how to write a book. Somehow I didn’t see the path forward on the goal. Then, miraculously I was introduced to a publisher in early December. The great news is I signed a contract to write a book to come out fall of 2024. Definitely cutting that 2023 New Year’s resolution a little close but I made it just under the wire. It took a nudge to pull the trigger and now that I am setting 2024’s goals, writing that book is at the top of the list..

While writing a book is one example of moving something forward in my life, it gives me such joy and a sense of accomplishment. Those are the feelings that I want to bring into the New Year, joy and accomplishment. So this year, I am taking a little extra time with the 2024 goals. I am breaking them down again this year into categories. Goals for health, relationships, career, our home and travel. Will I achieve them all? Absolutely not. Looking at my 2023 goals, Christmas in Bali didn’t happen. Not even close. Will it get pushed ahead to 2024, absolutely! I will get there eventually.

The goals for Charity Matters are also something I am really thinking about. Charity Matters, each of you and the people we  interview fill me with joy, always.  What is challenging is the expectation I place on myself and our team to create content each week. More often than not, amazing nonprofit founders cross my path and it is an organic process, which I love. There’s Dharma again:) Tracking people down, scheduling interviews, and all the time that goes into each episode is a huge commitment. Finding the right balance of posting/creating every other week or every week is challenging. So this year, with the book added to plate I am going to try to do what I can and be kind to myself.

Thank you all for helping by being beacons of light and believing in goodness. you wouldn’t be here if you didn’t. Each of you sharing these posts, subscribing to our podcast, and sharing our work on social media validates Charity Matters mission of connecting people and causes. So thank you for cheering us on and joining in this quest to be a messenger of goodness. I am running into 2024 with my heart wide open and full of optimism, ready to serve and receive.

Wishing you a magical year ahead filled with love, joy, abundance, fun and much goodness. I know your going to achieve all of this and more with you’re intentions!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

2023 A Year in Review

I am a planner. There is nothing I love more than making a plan. Along with that comes the joyful process of looking back at all that was accomplished in the past year before looking ahead to make plans for the next. Each day we all get into our routines and habits and some days and even weeks feel like the movie Groundhogs Day. You know the one, where every day feels the same as the day before.

However, when we look in the rearview mirror we see that each small step lead to something bigger. That is exactly how I feel about 2023.  There were so many days that felt isolating, repetitive and flat and yet, when you look at the amount of work our team produced ….well, it is pretty impressive. When you look at the small steps the year breaks down like this: 826 minutes recorded, 14 hours, 19 episodes and 48 post. It’s that rearview at this time of year that makes me proud of our work.

I don’t think of this as work but a mission and a movement towards good. Each week we to continue to show the world the best in humanity. I thought we would look back at some of the amazing humans we met this past year.

We met so many incredible people and all of them are amazing. These are just a few of the conversations that were fun, insightful and memorable for me, so if you missed them, make sure to listen or read their story.

Susan Axelrod: Cure Epilpsy

I loved meeting Susan Axelrod, the founder of Cure Epilepsy. Susan shared her remarkable journey of raising a child with a diagnosis know one really understood. More than that, she was determined to change the trajectory of the disease for others and she has done just that. What Susan has done and how many people’s lives she has changed is truly beyond inspiring.

Dan Zauderer: Grass Roots Grocery

We have all seen food prices go up and up and up. Have we thought about what that means for so many children whose only meal comes from their school lunch? One New York school teacher did when he realized 1 in 4 students were going hungry. Join us for the incredible story of a teacher turned nonprofit founder of Grass Roots Grocery. Dan has become a food distributor, motivator for thousands of volunteers and teaches each of us what really matters.

Kurt Kandler: 410 Bridge

Kurt Kandler’s story is one of resilience, passion, and dedication to improving the lives of those less fortunate. His organization, 410 Bridge, has faced numerous challenges in its mission to provide aid and support to communities in Africa. But despite these obstacles, Kurt’s unwavering commitment to the cause has led to tangible changes and a glimmer of hope in the lives of those who have been forgotten by society.


Ian Sandler: Riley’s Way

Ian Sandler is not your typical nonprofit founder, not that anyone who sets out to make the world better is average. It is unusual for most of our guests to have a full time day job in addition to a nonprofit. When you hear his remarkable story and his mission to create the next generation of kind leaders honoring his daughter’s beautiful legacy, you will understand. Riley’s Way is a magical example of turning loss into love.

Rachel Doyle: Glamour Gals

Rachel Doyle, started her nonprofit in high school and twenty years later has over ninety chapters nationwide connecting teens and senior citizens through GlamourGals. Join us for an inspirational conversation about what we can do for our seniors, ourselves, the power of connection and coming together over something beautiful.

As we get ready to say goodbye to 2023. Remember all of the good. As we look ahead to 2024, look at some of these remarkable leaders for inspiration to put towards your New Year’s resolutions. Wishing you a joyful, healthy and very Happy New Year!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2023 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Charity begins at home….and raising charitable children

charity-begins-at-home

We have all heard the expression that, “Charity begins at home,” a phrase that I wholeheartedly agree with.  However, when people approach me about how to “teach” philanthropy and the beauty of giving to others to their children…my response is that giving isn’t necessarily something you “teach” but rather a value that you adopt and model as a family.

In thinking about the best way to show your children how to care for others and to foster their love of helping others, reflect upon your own values and your families. If that is a goal for your family, then start by creating a culture of kindness and generosity where giving becomes something natural that your family does together.

Some other tips on raising charitable children…..

1. Start young, the earlier the better. For little ones (4 or 5), keep it simple, perhaps canned food for a local shelter or blankets for the homeless. Something that they understand.

2. Be age appropriate. Don’t overwhelm young children with world hunger but rather something relatable to them, perhaps something local in your community.

3. Engage your children in the process, especially the older they get. Find out what they care about? Perhaps they love animals and want to support a local shelter? Have them use their passion to make a difference. I have one son who struggled to learn to read, today he reads to children who struggle with the same thing he did.

4. Research together and suggests a few choices. With 1.9 million non-profits it can be overwhelming for all of us. Our family usually picks 3 or 4 ideas and then we vote on a holiday philanthropy project. We have adopted soldiers, fed homeless, adopted inner city families for Christmas. Ultimately it is the kids vote that decides.

5.  Be intentional with your own giving. Teach by example. Discuss what causes you care about. Let your children hear and see your volunteer efforts or participate in them if possible.

6.  Make giving habitual by being consistent. Whether its part of your allowance structure, a holiday tradition or something you do at birthdays, be consistent and establish giving as a tradition and habit. It’s no different from any sport, the more you participate the easier and more fun it becomes. Ultimately it becomes a part of who they are.

7.  Emphasize the joy and the experience of giving rather than money. Philanthropy is about being a part of something bigger than yourself. Giving is so much more fun than receiving. Make it a joyful experience for your family and something you share in together. Perhaps, start with entering a 5k walk or charity run or volunteering together.

The benefits of philanthropic children: These from Julie Nesbit of Whittier Trust

  1. Opens children’s eyes to the fact that others are not as fortunate as they are
  2. Develops empathetic thinking
  3. Fosters an appreciation for what they have
  4. Enhances self-esteem
  5. Correlates to improved performance in school

Like everything we do with raising our children, it takes time , patience, consistency and love.  Chances are you already do most of these things and don’t even realize it and your children do too. This holiday season, enjoy the process of giving in whatever way you decide to participate. You and your children will experience the real joy of the holidays….together.

Charity  Matters.

 

 

Copyright © 2016 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Episode 68: Driving Single Parents

I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Cyber Monday and a terrific Giving Tuesday! I’m so grateful to have today’s guest to remind us why we call this the season of giving. Join us as Cindy Witteman shares her journey from fleeing domestic violence, becoming a single parent then a nonprofit founder, author and tv show host of The Little Give. 

Cindy is a bright light, a survivor and someone who will inspire you with her purpose for giving back and the incredible story of her nonprofit, Driving Single Parents. 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Driving Single Parents does?

Cindy Witteman: What we do at Driving Single Parents is we really get people back in the driver’s seat. So since being a single parent is one of the hardest jobs you can possibly have, and doing so without a car can be very difficult. So our mission is really to get those single parent families back in the driver’s seat.

We actually give single parents a free vehicle at no charge to them, including tax on license. Everything is taken care of the only thing that single parents are responsible for is to obtain and maintain car insurance. And that’s not our role. 

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Driving Single Parents?

Cindy Witteman: I came from a single parent home. We had a lot of challenges financially, my mom was disabled, she was unable to work. So we were limited by some child support,  government assistance and my mom also got a disability check. So we really didn’t have a lot of fun growing up.

I decided to escape that situation and start a family my own with a white picket fence. Well, unfortunately, that didn’t happen the way I had planned. I ended up in a domestic violence marriage. That was a really hard time.  The hardest time was feeling trapped.  Being a single parent was the last thing on my list of things to do.  Well, I thought since the abuse was only happening to me,  that I could make it work.  I could cook a little better, clean a little better and do things a little better.  And if I did those things, then everything would be beautiful and wonderful. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen.

One day, I was a stay at home mom  folding a load a load of laundry and Dr. Phil came on and he said, ” It’s better to come from a broken home than it is to grow up in one.”  The minute I heard those words, it was almost like as if he was speaking directly to me. I literally stood up, I got a basket of clothes, a bag of diapers, my daughter’s and we escaped that situation.  I distinctively remember strapping my daughter into the car seat, who was five months old at the time, and thinking, “Wow, am I really going to do that? How am I going to do this? This is going to be so hard.”  I did it. I worked two jobs myself through college.

 I had this nagging tug on me to give back and I always thought, one day when I get a better place, I’m going to find a way to help single parents succeed. And I went through a lot of struggles with childcare. It’s just really hard to be a single parent especially when you don’t have that support from the other parent, that child support, or any financial support. If a kid is sick at school, they don’t have anybody to go pick them up but yourself which means you miss work. So I just really had this passion to really want to give back.

Once I was in a little bit better place, I got out of school and had a stable job.  I said okay, now I can start  thinking through how I’m going to give back. So I thought I’ll start a nonprofit. At first, I wanted to focus on childcare.  I wanted to do childcare. Well, I ran a poll here in San Antonio, Texas where I live, and nobody could get excited about a nonprofit that helps with childcare. There’s this misunderstanding that it’s government assistance already takes care of that.  There’s lack of funding, there’s long waiting lists. And so it’s not not the easiest thing to get.

But again, what is a good nonprofit if you don’t have anybody to donate to it, right? So I knew I had to pivot. So I started to think what was my second need? And I distinctively remember, I was actually at dinner one night, and I literally stood up at the table, and I was like,” That’s it! I’m gonna give away cars to single parents.” My fiancee said, “Oh, Cindy, now sit down, you are not giving away anything. Are you crazy? That the liability is just like outrageous.”   I listened very intently to all of his concerns. And then I woke up super early the next morning, I wrote a business plan. applied for nonprofit status, built the website, and we’ve been giving away cars at Driving Single Parents ever since.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Cindy Witteman: Who would have thought it’d be so hard to do something so good? Well, it can be  pretty challenging. So me being somebody who didn’t have any background in nonprofits. And I didn’t know anybody else who had founded a nonprofit. In fact, I don’t even think before that I had much money to give to a nonprofit. So I didn’t really know a lot about it, or how to do it. So I had to read audible books,  I read a lot a lot of books and figured it out

Oh wait, I need a board of directors? Wait, I need to pick a name?  So many things that I didn’t know that I needed in order to really get myself in a position to where it wasn’t gonna fail. You talk to a lot of people who have founded nonprofits, and they fail, oftentimes. It’s a small percentage that actually can keep it going long term. So I knew I had to find ways to make sure that driving single parents wasn’t going to be one of those. I worked really hard to learn everything I needed to know, and gather all the people around me who were able to get on board and really helped me grow it.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Cindy Witteman:  The very first car we gave away was less than a month after I had the idea. The person who received the vehicle was actually a single  dad named John Cano. He was unfortunately, hit by a drunk driver. In that accident, not only did he lose his car, but he lost his wife, and he left lost his right leg. He really became a single dad overnight, and then also had these major handicap needs that he had to overcome.

The vehicle really served as that tool he needed to not only help him get his kids to and from where they needed to go, but also himself to get himself back in the driver’s seat and get that independence back. Because when you  end up losing a limb, you’re reliant on everyone else. To be able to have healed enough to get behind the wheel of your own vehicle and to have that freedom can be really transformative.  He has sent me pictures of his kids, graduating, doing band practice, or him and that was six and a half years ago. He still drives it to this day to this day, that very same vehicle. He’s just doing wonderful and his kids are flourishing. And so I’m just so grateful. 

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Cindy Witteman: I want to amplify our efforts,  to help more people and to expand. I think a lot of misconception out there is that a vehicle is a luxury item. It maybe in some places but I’ll tell you here in San Antonio, Texas, it’s not. Oftentimes I get applications from individuals who have lost several jobs because they have to rely on public transportation. That public transportation doesn’t get you there where you need to be in a reasonable amount of time. It might take two or three hours for them to get on all the bus transfers, to get their kid to school, to get their kid the babysitter and then to get to work.  It can really put out the single parents who ended up being unemployed. Dispelling all of those misconceptions are really one of the big missions 

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Cindy Witteman: Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. That’s a quote by Henry Ford and it’s so true. Because if you believe you can do something you can and if you believe you can’t do something you can’t. And it really comes down to you and your beliefs. I’ve learned that I am not a product of my circumstances. I’ve learned that my past doesn’t define me.  Sometimes I didn’t have groceries or food when I was a kid but that didn’t define me. I ended up in a domestic violence situation situation. And I realized that I could easily just say,” Oh, poor me.” Or I could say when nothing goes right, go left. As a result, I could build a life that was everything I ever wanted.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Cindy Witteman: I think I change every day. You know, I think every single day I wake up, I don’t compete against anybody else in my life. I compete against myself. And I want to be a better person today than I was yesterday. And that’s something I work on every day. So I’m constantly changing. I’m constantly learning, I’m constantly growing. I’m constantly expanding my impact in whatever ways I possibly can.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2023 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

There is a season turn, turn, turn…

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and while I wanted to write about gratitude, this year I wanted to share this message. The first week of October I went back east with my sister to see the glory of fall. I did an instagram post with the lyrics of this song. For those of us old enough to remember the Byrd’s song, these lyrics have stayed with me since. As we witness so much chaos in our world,  I thought I would share them in hope they give you a little food for thought this Thanksgiving instead of just food. Knowing that each of us continue to look towards all the good we have in our world and our daily lives.

To everything turn, turn, turnThere is a season turn, turn, turnAnd a time to every purpose under Heaven
A time to be born, a time to dieA time to plant, a time to reapA time to kill, a time to healA time to laugh, a time to weep
To everything turn, turn, turnThere is a season turn, turn, turnAnd a time to every purpose under Heaven
A time to buid up, a time to break downA time to dance, a time to mournA time to cast away stonesA time to gather stones together
To everything turn, turn, turnThere is a season turn, turn, turnAnd a time to every purpose under Heaven
A time of love, a time of hateA time of war, a time of peaceA time you may embraceA time to refrain from embracing
To everything turn, turn, turnThere is a season turn, turn, turnAnd a time to every purpose under Heaven
A time to gain, a time to loseA time to rain, a time of sowA time for love, a time for hateA time for peace, I swear it’s not too late

It is fall and the season to shed all that no longer serves us. It is time to shed the hate, shed the fear, shed the ugliness about this political side or the other. The world is so divided right now and we need to lean into hard conversations. We are in a time of war but let us all work towards peace. It is always a season to love, to be loved and learn. So as we embrace the beauty of fall let’s embrace what we can shed and make a time for peace…and a time to every purpose under Heaven.

Wishing you all the most joyous Thanksgiving.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2023 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Episode 67: When We Walked By

The beauty of Charity Matters is meeting the most incredible humans and then being able to introduce them and share their stories.  More than that, so many of the people we have interviewed have become friends and today’s guest is most definitely one of them. You may remember Kevin Adler way back from episode 36 when he shared his journey of starting Miracle Messages. A organization that reunites the homeless with their families and builds social infrastructure around them through human connection.

Join us today to hear what Kevin is doing every day through his beautiful work with Miracle Messages.  Take a moment to hear about his incredible new book, When We Walk By, which comes out today . I have been reading it and can not say enough about how Kevin’s personal story, work and journey to help our unhoused neighbors is beyond inspirational. He is truly one of the most fun and interesting people to learn from.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Miracle Messages does?

Kevin Adler:  Miracle Messages is a nonprofit organization that I started about 10 years ago, in honor of my uncle, who had been experiencing homelessness for about 30 years in Santa Cruz. Our work really is focused on what we call relational poverty as an overlooked form of poverty. Meaning isolation, loneliness, disconnectedness, and often a stigma and a shame that accompanies that.

And so what we do at Miracle messages is we help our neighbors experiencing homelessness, rebuild their social support systems, and their financial security. And the three ways we do that. So first, we offer a family and friend reunification services. So many of our neighbors experiencing homelessness are disconnected from their loved one. And sometimes that’s not by choice, but because of digital literacy, or phone numbers change but biggest of all reason is the emotional barriers of shame, self loathing and stigma.

So we have through our network of volunteers, digital detectives finding the family delivering messages and helping them reconnect. And then our second program is because we do know that for some people, family may not be part of the solution, but maybe part of a problem. So that’s where we launched our volunteer phone buddy program, where we have volunteers now all over the world.  And so we connect them with our unhoused neighbors in the US for 30 minutes a week phone calls, text messages.  It is kind of like a Big Brothers, Big Sisters, for unhoused individual.

Then through that program and the relationships and the trust that was really built. We launched our third and most recent program, and that’s our direct cash gifting program. Where we picked individuals in our phone buddy program, who had been nominated by their friends volunteers to receive $500 a month for six months, no strings attached.  They use the money better than I could have used it for them. Two thirds of people who were unhoused were able to secure housing from $3,000 over six months. So that basically blew our mind and expectations. And we now have raised $2.1 million to give out more than a million and direct cash transfers $750 a month for 12 months to over 100 unhoused individuals throughout the state of California as part of a randomized control trial we’re doing with USC and Google.

Charity Matters: What are the biggest challenges you face working to help the unhoused?

Kevin Adler: So things that come top of mind that I think have shifted homeless services on the whole gets a very bad rap. And part of it is deservedly so. There’s a lot of money but there’s not much to show for that money. And it can be very frustrating, and infuriating, when elected officials when department heads when major homeless service agencies are saying, trust us, we know what we’re doing. When the reality of what you see is so disparate.  And that’s true that there is some inefficiencies in the system, a lack of coordination.

I think there’s a lot to be fixed within homeless services. And a lot of my critique in the book relates to a paternalism in the system, where we assume we know what’s better for our unhoused neighbors, then they know for themselves. And I think basic income is a great way to restore dignity and bottom up human centered.

I also think it’s critical that we have a conversation on the sources of homelessness in our country. Every one person, in the city of San Francisco gets off the streets, three more end up on the streets. And the vast majority of those people who get on the streets from San Francisco, have lived in San Francisco as housed people before they were homeless.  So then you have to start talking about the affordable housing, the lack of affordable housing, how wages earning, have not kept up with housing. 

So you have that you have income inequality, you have the criminal justice system, where there’s a revolving door where it’s illegal to be homeless, and it becomes that much harder relationship. And then you have and you have to talk about the substances that are on the streets. though, it’s not nearly as much a causal factor of homelessness. But if you’re in a vulnerable situation, unsheltered homeless and you’re struggling with the ongoing trauma, you’re having physical sores on your body from sleeping out, you’re terrified of the elements. Very easy to try to numb the pain and self medicate.

Charity Matters: What is one small thing that we can do to help the problem of the unhoused?

Kevin Adler:  I think we have to get relational, we have to be in a relationship. Unless you know someone who is currently experiencing homelessness, you will never have enough insight into the problem of homelessness to be able to make meaningful change. So I think the first thing is to get to know someone who’s currently experiencing homelessness. Hear their story, see their humanity, share some of yours. That’s what taught me everything I know about this issue is just through relationship. There are ways to do that as a phone buddy, visiting a shelter. It narrows what’s possible and narrows our own humanity if we narrow how we see them as human. 

Charity Matters: What inspired you to write the book?

Kevin Adler: I can share what what inspired me to write the book. In one word were stories. I have heard so many stories that have transformed my heart on this issue. I could not imagine  having those story just exist in social media posts on local news coverage that comes and goes without not only the story being honored, but the context being honored. Really the broader perspective of how that story tells us a bigger story that we may not be listening to. 

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you and writing the book?

Kevin Adler: I don’t want to say I’m a different person having done this work, I think I’m a fuller person, having done this work. All the ideas and concepts I had about right and wrong, my values. Pain, suffering in the world, travesty on the unjust. As well as the beauty and the resiliency of the human spirit.

 You know, it’s not just an idea. It’s not a concept, they have names, and they matter. And they’re friends of mine, many of whom we’ve lost. The average life expectancy on the street is like 53 years old, 30 years less than if you had housing. And so, you know, Timothy and Ronnie and Jeffrey, and Mark, and so many others that are no longer on this earth that were wonderful people. I think what I take with me is the friendships and the relationships.

 The life that they live and the travesty of a system where someone like Ronnie, who wanted to get into housing, never got access to housing.  The housing that was offered to him was in an area where drugs were present 24/7, and he declined to move into the housing because he didn’t want to relapse on his addiction. Someone like Ray, who was working as a sales person and had some serious heart problems and breathing issues, could no longer work. Then because of his pride, because of his dignity, he did not want to bring shame to his family. So his family didn’t know he was experiencing homelessness, and he just wandered the streets.

 I’m a better person for having done this work. And I am also a more hopeful person on this issue. I think the people who are closest to actually doing the work and knowing our unhoused neighbors are doing innovative work.  Like what we trying to do at Miracle messages, I have more hope that we can actually end homelessness in our lifetime. It’s going to take a lot of work. But it’s not an inevitability there was a time when homelessness did not exist in the way it does now. And there will be a time where it will be rare, brief and non recurring.  I think it’ll just take all of us to make sure that happens.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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What a week

The saying goes,  when it rains it pours. This past week it has been pouring, figuratively that is.  Last weekend we witnessed from afar the beautiful Maui Remembers paddle out to honor the 1,100 still listed as missing in Maui. The beginning of the week marked the 22nd anniversary of September 11th. As if that wasn’t overwhelming enough, came the devastating earthquake in Morocco that has killed thousands and displaced so many more. The loss is beyond overwhelming and the magnitude of each event alone is enormous but combined it is just too much.

This week we had prepared an entirely different post but with all of this happening in the same week, I found myself  overwhelmed. I thought perhaps, you might be too. There is a reason why many of us don’t watch the news at night any more because some days it is simply too much. This past week is certainly one of those times.

However, it is in tragedy and loss that we often see the best of humanity. This weekend we saw thousands paddle out to honor those lost in Maui in a beautiful tribute.  Maui is still rallying each day with meals, clothing and support for those whilst literally everything. In Morocco, we witnessed huge groups digging through the rubble in search of survivors despite their own loss. On Monday, we heard the names called one by one at the 911 Tribute. Each loss is a reminder of a life that mattered.

photo via: Project Hope

In moments of loss, there is nothing anyone can say to give comfort. There are no words. In time, you see the rebirth. A fire brings a new forest, an earthquake a new city and a death brings a rebirth. These are the stories we see and hear each week at Charity Matters. Humans with unbelievable loss who find it within themself to use their grief as fuel to help another. Week after week for twelve years I’ve heard these stories and they never get old, ever. The human spirit is remarkable in its ability to adapt, evolve, grow and serve.

So as sad and overwhelming as this past week has been around our globe, I am hopeful. I know that out of all this horrible loss, good will come and heal and spread. It always has and always will, in time.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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The Aloha Spirit

I sat down this weekend to write about National Nonprofit Day which is today. However, with all that is going on in Maui it somehow just didn’t feel like the right thing to share. So rather than talk about National Nonprofit Day, I thought I would take this time to share a few amazing nonprofits that are doing all they can to help those families in Maui who have lost everything.

When tragedy strikes we see the best of humanity. People coming together to help and support one another. In the nonprofit world this is simply a day at the office. Organizations working tirelessly every day to help one another. At this moment in time there are many great organizations that are working to help. I thought I would share a few of them here…

The Maui Strong Fund –We have dear friends who live in Maui and this seems to be the local favorite fund. The Hawaii Community Foundation is providing rapid response to families in need.

The Maui Food BankThe Maui food Bank has been helping people for decades on the island of Maui but now their need is overwhelming with thousands of people in need of food. 

United Way Maui  The United Way Maui was named the nonprofit of the year in 2022 in Maui and serves the Maui community in a multitude of ways.

Maui Humane Society – The Maui Humane Society is working hard to keep lost pets safe and trying to reunite many pets with their families. They are overwhelmed as are so many on Maui. If furry friends are your passion than maybe a small contribution to the humane society might be for you.

Salvation Army Hawaii– The Salvation Army is feeding people, setting up shelters and providing kits with basic necessity’s to people who have lost everything. 

World Central Kitchen– The World Central Kitchen has already supplied over 16,000 meals to first responders and families in Maui within the first five days of the fires. They continue to arrive and set up meals when and where disaster strikes. 

In addition, there are so many great places all over this country hosting fundraisers, collection drives and Go Fund Me pages, I am including a friend of mine’s Go Fund Me link here as well. There are opportunities for all of us to pitch in ways big and small.

So as we acknowledge National Nonprofit Day and all that these incredible organizations do everyday to help, it seems like a good day to lean in and do just that. The people of Maui need us now.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Time for a break

Sometimes you just know when it’s time to take a break. For me, I know the time is now. The tank is empty and it is time to rest, relax and refuel. Running a nonprofit is a labor of love. You give all you have and somehow it never feels like it is enough. A little like parenting, I suppose. The work is rewarding beyond measure but the emotional heavy lifting of those that we serve can take it’s toll.

For TACSC the year kicks off with raising money to send about one third of our kids to our leadership camp. We  have amazing volunteers but our entire organization is four employees, so we all do A LOT! Once the money is raised the next challenge can come to explaining what over night camp is to underserved families who have never sent their children away. This is a process! As the school year comes to a close we have to make sure that we have everybody registered and ready to come to camp. The paperwork, parent calls and getting our team ready is a huge undertaking.

By the third week of June, when our first campers arrive we have already been pushing hard.  The great thing about giving is that once these smiling faces show up, they do refill our tank, for sure! Then we take a break and get ready for the next round of students join us. Finally, we close up July with our High School students.

The results make it all worth it. Our students have transformed in their confidence, leadership skills and notes come pouring in from parents and campers about their experience. Life long friendships are formed and we know that the world is just a little bit better because of the work we do. We are happy, fulfilled and exhausted.

So as I wrap up my tenth year at TACSC and Season Five of our Charity Matters podcast, it seems like a good time to refill the tank for a couple of weeks. I’m not officially on vacation but slowing down the pace to enjoy what’s left of summer. We will be getting interviews going for Charity Matters and getting ready for Season Six of our podcast. Until then, we will be sharing a few interviews you may have missed or want to revisit. So relax, go on a walk, lay on a chaise lounge, take a listen and a rest. You deserve it too!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Happy 12th Birthday Charity Matters!

Twelve years ago I had a dream. For someone who sleeps through earthquakes and their own children crying it was extremely in usual to be woken up in the middle of the night by a dream. This was one of those dreams that was so real that you felt as if you watch the scene from your life. It was unlike any dream I had ever had before. The dream was to tell the stories amazing humans who make the world better. The dream was Charity Matters.

I remember it so clearly, I literally got out of bed, found paper and pen and wrote it all down. The next day I told my husband that I think I’m supposed to be starting something. He replied,” That’s great! What are you going to start?” I replied, I was going to start blog and a website that told and empowering stories about real life heroes. His response,” A website? You can barely operate a computer.  Are you sure this is the right direction?”

His comments were valid. Technology and I were barely friends in July of 2011. That is the truth. Since I had just walked away from running a nonprofit my skills were a little rusty at best. Building a website by myself, which I did was an enormous challenge. Knowing where to go for help, how to start finding my heroes and all of it was more than a little daunting. In reality, what did I have to lose? Nothing. What did I have to gain? The ability to leave the world better than I found it. To connect people to causes that matter. Helping the helpers and creating an upward spiral of kindness and goodness. There was no option but forward.

Today, 12 years later I still feel the same way. I continue to have technological challenges. However, the risk versus reward definitely points in favor of reward. Rewarding is exactly the word for this 12 year milestone. Charity Matters has been more than rewarding. Its hard to believe that we have had almost 2,000 posts, hundreds of nonprofit interviews  and over 60 Podcast interviews. We have met remarkable humans from all walks of life. Learned so much about resilience, kindness, compassion and the human spirit.

Each person we have met has been an incredible gift and privilege. They have trusted us with their story, shared openly and honestly the huge challenges of this work. More than that, each nonprofit founder lifts us up. Reminds us who we can be and shows us the best of humanity. To all of the nonprofit founders who have shared, thank you. To all of you who listen and read this each week, thank you. You bless me and this work and propel it forward. My gratitude has no words.

So here is to onward and upward! My birthday wish is for Charity Matters to continue to grow and spread. So if you feel like giving us a gift this year, tell a friend, share a post that inspired you. That is how we collectively change the world. One small action, one story, one person at a time. Thank you for changing mine.

Happy Birthday CHARITY MATTERS!

 

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Episode 62: Mitchell Thorp Foundation

There is nothing better than meeting a total stranger and feeling like you could be old friends. That is exactly the warmth and graciousness that today’s guest Beth Thorp brought to this week’s conversation. Beth is a ray of sunshine who shares her incredible story of loss and purpose.

It is always challenging talking to parents who have lost a child.  Beth and her family have taken their loss and turned it into incredible support for families whose children suffer from life threatening illness with their organization the Mitchell Thorp Foundation. Join us today for an uplifting, inspirational conversation of love, family, faith and purpose.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what The Mitchell Thorp Foundation does?

Beth Thorp: We are a public 501 C3  organization and we support families with children with life threatening illnesses, diseases and disorders by providing financial emotional resource support to them.  The foundation is in honor of my son’s name. That’s why it’s titled Mitchell Thorp Foundation. His name was Mitchell. He was my firstborn son and beautiful young man. A 4.0 students who loved to play baseball. He was known for that and his father played the Dodger organization at one point before he succumb to an injury. We are a little nuts when it comes to baseball season around here.

 

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start The Mitchell Thorp Foundation?

Beth Thorp: My son at the age of 13, came home from school with very severe headaches.  As any parent, you think maybe you’re coming down with the flu or something. So you do next indicated thing, give him a pain reliever go lay down. As days went on, he kind of got a little better, and then went back to school, but the couldn’t concentrate with  head pain. Until one day he came home and he just kind of collapsed in the front yard, which just totally frightened me.

 I’m  crying out to my husband come quick, something is seriously wrong.  We go to the doctor, and then it was really a rude awakening to our medical system. We checked off the boxes going to the doctors, and then it gets worse than he ends up in the hospital.. At his first hospital stay, he was there for three days running tests and things kept coming back negative normal. So then you’re trusting the doctors going down this path. Fast forward we had a five year journey of chasing pain, chasing trying to find a diagnosis and doctors scratching their heads trying to figure out what it was. It was a season of chaos, fear and anxiety and all those emotions that were watching your child suffer.

 This was also a  season of testing your faith.  We all go through it at some point in time in our lives, where the rug gets pulled out from underneath us, and things change on a dime. And you’re not expecting it at all. Where is your strong foundation? Because if you don’t have one, you’re going to crumble. We’ve seen so many people who fall into situations like us.  Statistically  close to 75% of families end up  in divorce or separation because the stresses of dealing with a medically critical ill child or a child with severe disabilities.

In 2008, a story ended up in the Union Tribune, about our family.  People really wanted to help us and they created a walkathon to help us pay off our huge medical bills that we had even with great insurance.  That experience totally changed us and humbled us and it really was also in my deepest pain and grief from losing our son.

As the faithful woman,  I heard something deep within my spirit resonate.   I knew it had to been God’s speaking to me because he said, “This is not the end, this is the beginning.” And I just sat up in my bed looked up or the heavenlies and said, “Oh, this feels like the end. What do you mean? What do you mean by that?”

So I’m looking up there and asking where did that thought come from? Why would I think that? Where would that have come from? That same week, my husband was at the local church and there was two boys he coached in baseball.  Both boys unfortunately had cancer.  Again, families trying to make ends meet and he really had that strong calling. He thought, we should form a foundation to help many families going through what we went through. So he comes home to tell me that.  And I said, “You want to do what?” Then I really had to realize, Oh my goodness maybe that’s what he meant by that this is not the end, this is the beginning.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Beth Thorp: It takes so much drive and that entrepreneurial spirit to make this work happen. The perseverance you really have to have is strong. And for us, it was a God given vision that we could not let go. This vision was driving us forward, like a steam engine.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Beth Thorp: We’ve actually given back over $3 million already back into the community. So that’s like, oh, wow, we’ve helped 1000 plus people and children and counting.  That’s a huge!  We just started with one child and one family at a time. And that’s how it started. And you just kind of kept one foot in front of the other.  Seeing these families scared out of their minds and just being that light in the dark for them is is huge for us. But yeah, the impact was huge.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Beth Thorp: I thought about that question and the big dream. Well, the beautiful thing was since the release of the book, my publisher now put me in touch with two film producers, who are we are writing a screenplay. Yay! We wanted to take the organization worldwide, because right now we’re just California based. We we want to build different chapters throughout the United States.

We do see ourselves what we call scaling up for that and we’re getting ready for that.  And we’re in the midst of taking it and the book into an adaptation into script. So we’ll see what happens? That would be my my dream. To see it on film, the story out to those who need to hear it, to see it.  And that’s going to be an inspirational story.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Beth Thorp: I think what changed me the most is learning that I have no control over anything. If you think about it, we really don’t have control over anything. Especially my type of personality, we want to control and make things work the way it should work.  So the big lesson was surrender.

I keep having to surrender every day. It’s not my will, but his.  And when you can learn to do that it’s a beautiful thing to see how people come into your life, serendipitously. Those divine appointments, keep surprising me. So that is the one thing that has changed me, giving up the control and keep surrendering. 

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Beth Thorp: There’s a lot of lessons that I had to learn. Well, I think for me was to stay strong in my faith, because faith doesn’t always take you out of problem. They’ve taken you through it. Faith doesn’t always take away the pain but its going to give you the ability to get through it. And then faith doesn’t always calm the storms of life but it gets you through the storms. So it’s really for me, it was just hanging on. I’m like a cat with the claws when I felt like I wasn’t hanging on. But just staying strong in that and to just persevere and never give up.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2023 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.