We are a month past New Years, which feels like a million years ago, right? For us here in LA, 2025 didn’t start out as planned. The fires that ravaged the Palisades and my hometown of Pasadena are still devastating to everyone. Oftentimes, it takes a tragedy to be reminded of what really matters. I can tell you as we evacuated we looked around after grabbing our photos, papers and dog and realized nothing else really mattered. What I do think, regardless if you evacuated or not, is that you take a serious assessment of what really matters to you.
For us, this recent tragedy put life more in focus of what we care about. As a result, my husband and I tried a different approach with the things we hope to achieve and how we want to live this year. We spent time together discussing what is important to us and what we want to do this year together. Because of that conversation, we broke our year down into quarters and decided that we would go on one mini adventure per quarter. Then we reached out to a few friends and asked if they wanted to join us and we began to create a plan.
The goal was to fill up our jar or in this case calendar with golf balls. Have you ever seen the famous video where the professor fills a jar with golf balls? He describes these four golf balls as the most important things in your life. For most of us those golf balls are family, health, friends and community. Next the professor puts pebbles in the jar with all of life’s have too’s the birthday parties, the work obligations, you get the idea. Then comes sand followed by water. His point is that most of us don’t start with what matters first.
This year we are starting with fun, family time and prioritizing those memories first. I am determined to make more real connections. The old fashioned in person type. So much of our days are spent on zoom or phone calls but not in person and it can be lonely. Creating moments where we can be with the ones we love also gives us something to look forward to.
Connections come in many ways and one of the best ways to create connection is to serve, volunteer or help someone. Last year the Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy, called loneliness a public health crisis. A recent study from the American Psychiatric Association found that 30% of adults say that they have feelings of loneliness at least once a week and 10% saying that they are lonely everyday. The poll’s definition of loneliness was “feeling like you do not have meaningful or close relationships or a sense of belonging.”
One easy cure is to help others and get involved. When we volunteer we are not on our phones looking at someone else’s life, we are living our own. Whether we are helping a student learn to read, helping families dealing with their loss or volunteering at our local food pantry, you are reaping all the benefits of service, most especially a sense of purpose. When we help others we lose site of our problems, we make connections and it reaffirms our impact in the world.
Since February is the month of love, it seems like a perfect time to create more connections, community and joy. Think about what matters to you, who you can help and start putting those golf balls in the jar first. The rest of life will fill itself in. Remember it is never too late to change your life for good or someone else’s life.
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