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Praying for Florida and North Carolina

Once again, I had planned on writing an entirely different post but as I write this Milton is quickly approaching Florida. By the time you read this it will have hit Tampa and the surrounding communities devastating so many who were already trying to recover from Hurricane Helene just thirteen days ago. It is unfathomable to imagine having to flee your home twice in two weeks time and not knowing what you will return to.

It is in times like these that we see who we really are. We see neighbors helping neighbors, we see the power of community, of connection and kindness. We see the best in humanity and who we should strive to be. All of that gives me hope in a nation so divided right now. We can put all of that division aside and simply reach out a hand to help someone in need. The time is now.

Speaking of need, I have read a few notes from nonprofits who are doing rescue work, Team Rubicon and Samartian’s Purse who said that what they need more than anything is funding. While donations of water and food and clothing are wonderful, those donations mean that people have to sort and organize. That process takes aways from the man hours that could be used ordering and distributing vital resources that are needed. I sent a little something and hope I can do more.

As we pray for Florida, last week I was interviewed by an amazing  Floridian named Naz Rose, for her podcast, Third Eye Talks. Naz and I had a conversation about what we do with all that grief and loss? How can we turn pain into purpose? Naz, not only works for a nonprofit but she coaches others on finding their way. She is amazing and you should definitely check out her website here. The episode is below and seems timely with all of the loss that so many are experiencing right now. You can listen here.

As we send prayers to Florida, I am choosing to focus on the power of community. Knowing what we can do when we come together for something bigger than ourselves. I know how amazing people are.

This past week I felt the love like never before with the kindle version of Change for Good out on Amazon. It is a little like art imitates life. Each week I write to you about the kindness of people, the power of community and giving. Last week so many of you purchased the book and left beautiful reviews. Thank you! At last check the book was ranked #5 in Spirituality, #13 in Spiritual Biography and #36 in Biographies of Religious leaders…not exactly sure how that happened? But I’ll take it!

Once again, thank you for all the love, reviews, emails it has been an incredible week. Next week the book is officially released in paperback. So much gratitude to all of you who continue to believe in good, do good and make the world a better place.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Coming together to create change for good

The world is a chaotic place. What I had hoped to write and what I am actually writing are two very different things. That is because in the past week we have seen attacks on Israel and a natural disaster of epic proportions in North Carolina, Florida and Georgia. Watching millions without power, food or water is absolutely devastating. My prayers go out to everyone in the area and all who are suffering in both areas.

Some people love to give to international aid organizations and others try to find local causes, so I wanted to provide a few resources for Ashville, NC here, if you are so inclined to help.

Speaking of help, I wanted to thank all of you for yours with the digital launch of my new book, Change for Good: The Transformational Power of Giving as the Ultimate Cure  I am so thrilled to announce that the book is available digitally on Amazon and I would be incredibly grateful if you considered picking one up and writing a few words on a review. The paperback comes out October 15th and the hope is to get to bestseller status before that date with downloads and reviews.  I am learning so much about this industry and truly appreciate your support. 

The overarching theme of the book is that service is the silver bullet. When we come together to support one another through good times and bad we build social infrastructure, create bonds, connections and become stronger. We are witnessing the power of community right now in North Carolina.

Speaking of community, I have been incredibly touched by the groups that have reached out for me to speak, to do book clubs and signings and have felt this incredible community connection and gifts. My advice for anyone who wver wants to feel loved, write a book. The love I felt from everyone I have ever known and from this beautiful community has been beyond remarkable. So thank you all for reconfirming my belief that people are good and that we can all create Change for Good!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Looking at the numbers….

I hope you had a great Labor Day weekend and are enjoying this short week! Speaking of labor,  I work hard and want my work to matter, to make a difference. I admit, I am a little competitive too. However, I’m not always good at metrics and score keeping. People ask me about stats and numbers for our subscribers, listeners and all of that and to be honest, I am so busy creating that I rarely look. Should I be looking more often? Yes, I know. I’m more competitive  with myself than with others.

If I look and see that we are not doing as great as another podcast that can sometimes stop me from moving forward. I understand that analytics are important but somehow that isn’t the measuring stick that I usually use. My measuring stick is your comments, your emails, when you tell me something you did because of what you read here. That is what fuels me forward.

Last week I was the guest on a terrific new podcast called Mom to More. The format is interviewing women who have been at home with their children for at least ten years and telling their journey back to work. It was a great conversation. During our talk,  Sharon Macey, the host, mentioned her new podcast ranking. I asked her where she found her data. Because getting insights from Apple isn’t the easiest in my experience. She told me she uses ListenNotes

Naturally, I pulled up Listen Notes and discovered that we are ranked in the top 5% of podcasts in our catagory out of over three million podcasts in the world. WhooHoo! I was over the moon to see those numbers and that is because of you! All of you listen and share these episodes, spreading the word of people doing good. Since today is the International Day of Charity, I can not think of a better way to celebrate. I am so grateful to this beautiful tribe. You are the people changing the world each day by investing in kindness. You make choices what to listen to and you choose good. I am beyond grateful to you, thank you.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

A little insight

In full disclosure, my husband has called me Dharma for years. If you remember the TV show called Dharma and Greg? You know the one where the husband is all about facts and figures and his wife is a little WhooWhoo and out there. The truth is I definitly have some Dharma in me. Ever since I lost my mom, there have beem so many unexplained “coincidences” in my life that I am open to what God, the Universe is trying to tell me. The Dharma has come out in me for sure!

A few weeks ago, I was on a group call with the publisher of my upcoming book, along with many of the other women authors they represent. We meet weekly to connect and share our writing journeys with one another. On this zoom meeting, I met a woman named Kim Beam who offered to give me a reading. She is lovely.  A hospital social worker by day, an author and someone who has a gift to share with the world.

Truth be told, I was terrified of a reading. I had never had one before. What was she going to see and say? Why is it that the first thing that comes to your mind is bad news? That is exactly where my mind went. Kim said, “I would love to talk to you about your book.” Certainly, this has been one of the scariest things I have ever done. You feel incredibly vulnerable putting yourself out there and it is scary. Nervously, I said,” That would be great. I would like to know if I’m on the right path?” It couldn’t hurt to ask, right?

I was a guest on Kim’s podcast, Intuitive Insights. The episode is above. After receiving the reading, I again felt vulnerable sharing it. Am I so weird that I even had this reading? Will people think I’m crazy? All of these thoughts raced through my head. As soon as the negative thoughts passed, I realized that once again to be brave you must be vulnerable. In life you have to take risks. You have to try if you really want to make a difference.

So here I am, Dharma and all. Nervous, excited, thrilled, terrified and proud of myself, all at once.

It would be great to be a New York Times best-selling author. But you know what is even better than that? Trying and jumping into the arena. I signed up to get in the race and I’m close to the finish line. At the end of the day, all we can do is try our best. If that means being vulnerable in order to use our gifts to the greatest good, then here we go….

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Rounding Up for a Cause

Last week, I was at the grocery store when they asked me if I wanted to round up for charity. Of course my answer was yes. Who doesn’t want to give forty-four cents to a cause they care about. For that matter, who uses change anymore? It was easy, it was effortless and it made me feel great when I really didn’t do anything. It got me wondering how many round up apps and organizations are out there and are they working?

The results made me really happy and I thought they were worth a share.  There are a number of apps that individuals can get to give to a cause when they make a purchase. Apps such as RoundUp or Coin Up are for people who want to give their extra change with their own purchases or like me at the store when the company asks me if I want to donate my change? RoundUp works both ways. You can pick a cause and “RoundUp” every purchase for a cause you care about. The app may partner with a store or restaurant you frequent and you can “Round Up” that way.

In the United States alone we donated more than $470 Billion dollars last year and more than 60% of that was from individual donors. According to Engage for Good which tracks point of sale donations, in 2022 nonprofits raised $749 million dollars in point of sale donations. It seems that corporations are jumping on the giving bandwagon. The Taco Bell Foundation alone brought in over $42 million dollars last year from its Round Up partnership with its 7,500 restaurants across the country. Now that is some serious change for good!

 

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Back to school is a time to Change for Good

As summer comes to an end, back to school brings us another chance to start anew, especially for our children. Fall is a time for everyone to shed the old and begin again. It isn’t just for students. When we are looking at ways to improve ourselves we don’t always think about helping others. We usually think about losing weight or making more money. If we really want to change, wouldn’t changing for good be a great starting point? 

Let’s take a moment to think about what gifts we have that could help someone else? What I am asking you is what is in your tool box? Maybe you have a passion for gardening and you could work with schools to develop their gardens or work on an inner city garden?  The options for your gifts and matching the needs of others is endless.

The challenge is that we do not think about our gifts as things to give away. It doesn’t just have to be money that we give. The greatest gift we have is our time and our talent so why don’t we start with giving those first? Think about your gifts. You are an accountant, an attorney, an artist, a baker, in marketing, an organizer, whatever it is you do for a living there is a gift in that skill. It is a gift that someone can use. There is a match for a nonprofit that needs just the gift you have. Giving doesn’t need to be menial, it needs to be joyful.

Once you have figured out what you are good at and you know your gifts, now the fun part is to begin to think about where to give them away. You don’t want to give your gifts to just anyone, hopefully there is a cause you care about. What makes you so fired up thinking about it that you need to do something? Let’s start with that. 

Then it’s time to ask yourself a few questions. What change do you want to see? Do you care about the rainforest or are you worried about the literacy rate in America? Starting to understand the problem you want to address will let you know if this is what you want to get more involved with. We need to understand the problems before we can begin to identify solutions and how we can be a part of them.

The bigger the problem, the slower the change and the longer it can take to see an impact. Solving a problem like breast cancer research can be slow. Ask yourself where you will see change and who will benefit from this change?  Then ask yourself what the timeline is that you are looking for. There are no wrong answers but asking yourself these questions will help set you up for success with whichever path you pursue.

There are 1.6 million nonprofits with a need for people to help and share their gifts. Today, there are dating apps for singles but in the nonprofit space there are a number of great sites to match people and skills. One of the best is called catchafire.org Think of it as Linkedin or Bumble for nonprofits. 

You can go onto their site and list your skills as an attorney, graphic artist, accountant, marketing and then list what causes you care about. For example, say that you love animals and are a graphic designer. CatchAFire will match you with a project from a nonprofit such as creating graphics for a new fundraising campaign. It is an incredible way to try on a cause, meet new people and build your resume while making a difference.

 There are other sites that have more traditional volunteer work like VolunteerMatch.com You can put in your zip code and be given a wide range of opportunities in your area which is a terrific way to meet people in your community and make a difference. This is another great place to begin to dip your toe into the giving back pool of joy. Let’s make sure this fall we are all changing for good!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

One For All

“Believe with all your heart that how you live your life makes a difference.”

Colin Brown

I have always believed in angels among us and looking back at the conversation I had with nonprofit founder, Mari Rodriguez was proof to me that angels are here on earth. My dear friends have been involved with supporting Mari and her work to provide the most underserved children and families in her neighborhood of Inglewood.

Mari came to the United States at age 19 and taught herself English. She became a citizen and a nurse. She raised a family and people in the neighborhood were coming to her for help with their children. First, it was a few and then a few more and then a hundred and now hundreds. Mari is living proof that one person can change the world and one of the most amazing humans I have had the privilege of talking to.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what One For All does?

Mari Rodriguez: One For All encourages students to stay in school, graduate from high school and we give these students and families the supplies and guidance they need to accomplish that.  Our mission is to help build the character of our children through social programs that emphasize the importance of personal growth as well as develop the community as a whole.

We do back to school backpacks and supply drives, toy drives for winter, we have students bring their report cards and if they are getting a 3.0 GPA or higher they are rewarded for good grades and if not we get them tutoring, we do prom dress giveaways and whatever students need, sometimes its as basic as a pair of shoes for school, we find it and help. The biggest thing we do is give $500 scholarships for those students with good grades who are going to college.

We currently serve over 500 students a year between the ages of 5 and 18.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start One For All?

Mari Rodriguez: I lived in Inglewood and saw that the children in my neighborhood didn’t have guidance. So, in 2001 I talked to the pastor at our church on the corner and asked if we could use the church parking lot to help children and families. Then we started an event on our street to gather everyone together but our neighbors were so impacted and the neighborhood couldn’t accommodate everyone. I wasn’t sure what to do because I was still working full time as a nurse during the day and raising my children and helping all the neighborhood children at night and after work.

In 2007, I had a patient that kept telling me I needed my 501c3 and I had no idea what these numbers meant or what that was. While I was working in the doctor’s office a patient asked me about what I do in my free time and I told him. He said I needed my 501c3 and his wife would help me. She did and in 2007  One For All became an official nonprofit organization. 

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Mari Rodriguez: Donors. The hardest part is raising funds.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Mari Rodriguez: (Tears) The love of people. The love of people fuels me. Sometimes I want to quit and think I cannot go on and then people hug me and thank me for helping them. When families need me. This is my purpose in life to help others.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Mari Rodriguez: I think of all the people whose lives I have touched. From a five year old girl who died of cancer and whose funeral I did because her mother just couldn’t, to the young boys who were becoming gang members and we were able to get them to change direction, to the young man who was gay and thinking about suicide for fear his parents wouldn’t accept him.   I got involved and this boy is now a wonderful and happy young man in college with his family’s support.

When I close my eyes I see myself on a journey helping, going forward, helping, helping and not looking back just keep going and helping. I see the hugs, the smiles of all these people and that is my reward. I love this country with all my heart. I came to this country at 19 with nothing but dreams. I dreamed I was going to do something big.

I taught myself English and with the help of two angels went to nursing school. It was such hard work and my life has been so good. I have to give everything I have received. I am so grateful.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had?

Mari Rodriguez:We started with 25 kids in 2001 from my home. Then we had 100 and then 200 kids and we would close down our street to do our events. Our neighbors asked us to take our events off of our street and we moved our programs to the church in Inglewood. Today we help more than 500 children and families. This year we will distribute over thirty $500 scholarships for our students who are going to college.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for One For All, what would that be?

Mari Rodriguez: The dream I have is to find more supporters. We need more school supplies. I dream of finding someone who can donate backpacks. To me, the most important thing is to keep giving more scholarships to motivate these kids to stay in school and to help us really help them.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Mari Rodriguez: It hasn’t changed me, I continue being humble and treat everyone equally. I really do not like to talk about me. I would rather just help others. 

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Mari Rodriguez: I have learned that anybody can help somebody. Nothing is too little to help another. Each individual can help somebody. If you can not give money you can give love or conversation to someone who is lonely. Anybody can make a difference in the world. To start a nonprofit with an intention to help others is enough. I am just happy to help these families.

 

Charity Matters.

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

She Said Yes!

Thirteen years ago when I started Charity Matters when our sons were sixteen, fourteen and ten. Today, they are 29, 27 and 23 so time has flown by.  Each of you has walked this journey of service and parenting with me for all these years. I am beyond grateful to each of you. It feels like yesterday that I shared the story of our middle son, Henry’s, last football game, called The Last Pass.  Followed by the story of the The Last Lunch . There were so many last before Henry left for college. Again, you followed  along on my love letter called , A Mother’s Sendoff .

It has been such a priviledge to share our son’s journeys with you. I am thrilled to share that Henry got engaged this past weekend to his amazing fiance Shelby. We are on cloud nine seeing two people we love so dearly are so incredibly happy. These are the moments we live for, remember and cherish.

This week we are celebrating with Shelby’s family and enjoying summer and our precious time together. Thank you for walking this journey with our family and for understanding that our Season Eight is going to be a little late. We will be busy smiling and celebrating just a little bit longer.

 

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Happy 13th Birthday Charity Matters

Meet Heidi Johnson

 

Meet Heidi Johnson

Episode 79: Growing to Give

As most of you know I have spent the past few months wrapping up the book. In the process, the publisher is an amazing connector and loves to bring all of her authors together for weekly coffee connections via zoom. It is so great to meet other female authors and some of the most interesting and inspiring women. A couple months back I was in a zoom chat room when I met Siobhan Shaw, a fellow nonprofit founder.

I’m so excited to share  Siobhan and her husband, John’s, incredible story in the creation of their nonprofit, Growing to Give. Their story is a beautiful full circle reminder of following your heart, your roots and always thinking of ways to serve others.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Growing to Give does?

Siobhan Shaw:  Our mission is to provide sustainable agricultural systems to small scale community farmers in marginalized and climate vulnerable communities. We help them grow more food with less resources, specifically water, fertilizer, space, labor, and increase their production and the quality of the food coming off their farms and gardens. So that when they’re giving the food they grow to food banks, or they’re selling it through farm markets to actually support the operations, their nonprofit operations, they are actually turning a profit in a nonprofit way. 

We want to free people from hunger, we have partners in Africa and 60% of the population of Africa is going hungry. There’s to be no one going to bed hungry at night, by choice.

Charity Matters: Did you grow up in a philanthropic family?

Siobhan Shaw:  I grew up on a farm. I was the lucky one. My mom was the farmer. My dad went to work. They had both served in World War II. Not only had my parents served their country, and sacrificed greatly. They lived through the Depression as young people and then they raised five children.

We took not only care of the environment, and we took care of other people. If you didn’t have something, somebody else had something. There was a lot of trading and there was always people coming to our home. We had this big dining room table, and it was full with family as well as with people that didn’t have a place to go.. Helping people was just in my DNA.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Growing to Give?

Siobhan Shaw: My husband John grew up on a farm as well. So we had already been together, almost a decade. I was in the film industry in casting and producing. John was in construction and our life was amazing. Then I got a call from John that he’d been rushed to the hospital. He just received a call from the doctor and he was told he had stage four cancer.  It was the moment in my life, where my entire world just collapsed.  This was out of left field and there was so much heartbreak and fear.

So oncome, the surgeries and the chemo rounds and then one day, he went up for a nap. When he  came down a few hours later he said, “I think I died. I saw the white light. There was a big glowing light. And I’m back, because I have something to do.” John didn’t know what it was but he was absolutely changed from that moment on. He had this profound near death experience and with it a renewed purpose in life. So he went traveling because he didn’t know what it was he was supposed to be doing here.

During his travels, he noticed that there was a lot of a lot of mention about farmers committing suicide.  What was happening around then was that the rain belt had shifted from the breadbasket of Australia.  So this was natural rain that farmers used so they didn’t need irrigation. Now their crops were being destroyed and the farmers were giving up. John came back and he just started tinkering and started cutting holes in pots. I had no idea, I thought he’d lost his mind. John learned how to write his own patents and he developed all kinds of different systems: water reduction systems for agriculture. 

We were ready to start manufacturing when John said,”We can get these units on the shelves at the big box stores, but I don’t feel that’s what I was called to do.  I feel like I need to give this away to the world and to people that really need our help. I want to find a way to help them and give it away to them.  If we can give somebody the tools that they need to have a productive farm, then they won’t need help anymore. That is how we started.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Siobhan Shaw: We received our nonprofit status on December 24th, 2019 and just months later the world shut down. So that was a challenge. We were just getting started. Like all nonprofits, funding is always a challenge.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Siobhan Shaw: I think John keeps me going. And then the fact that we both grew up in rural communities, we know what hard work is.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Siobhan Shaw: We’ve grown and given away over 100,000 pounds of produce to local food banks.  We will never know the impact from the people who received that food. We do see an impact with the community of volunteers who work on the farm with us.

In addition to our work here in Arizona, we partner with other nonprofits in communities around the United States, in the Caribbean, and Africa. These are three areas that really need our help. So we have about 30 partnerships and we’re working to write grants to help us give these people sustainable systems from The Crop Circle Farm and Garden Systems. 

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Siobhan Shaw: I don’t think when we had the idea of Growing to Give that we’d really thought about anything other than we just want to free people from hunger around the world. I guess that was the big idea, right? That was the moonshot.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Siobhan Shaw:  That you can turn adversity into opportunity. That’s beautiful opportunity for community. Because it’s not about you. There are lots of people who are self-serving. It was all about me and then life changed for me and for John, too.  We went from things being all about us, to what can we do to serve? How can we help? You know, and so we transformed. It’s taking that negative and transmuting it. So even if any negativity comes into your life, look at it as a divine moment. You can transmute that negativity into positive, life affirming opportunities that help everybody.

I just want to leave you with something John told me when he was really close to death. He looked at me and said,” Love is the only thing you take with you and the best thing you leave behind.”

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Strong women

 

I was recently scrolling through Facebook and saw my cousin’s post. He was visiting Kalamazoo where his mother and mine grew up.  In his post he shared this picture of my grandmother pouring coffee at her restaurant. This image really got me thinking about the women who came before me.  I can not think about these incredibly strong women without thinking of all the challenges their lives presented and how they faced them.  The old adage of what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger comes to mind.

My grandmother, Dorthy, was my mom’s mother. She was widowed with four children at age thirty-five in 1947 in Kalamazoo, Michigan. My grandfather had been a well known race car driver and was killed in a racing accident. How did a widow in the late 1940s support four children? My grandmother was incredibly smart but she was also a very good cook. So she used the skills she had, rolled up her sleeves and opened a restaraunt. I have no idea the struggles she had to endure or the details. Seeing this picture makes me think of all she had to juggle as a single parent of four.

My great grandmother, Dorthy’s mother-in -law, lived next door. While mother and daughter in law relationships tend to be sticky, as this one was, my great grandmother jumped into help. My great grandmother was the antiques buyer for Marshall Field Department stores. When I think about my great grandmother’s career in the forties and fifties, as a woman, it is also beyond inspiring.  My great grandmother was very active in raising my mom and her three other grandchildren.

My mother was famous for telling my sisters and I almost daily, “Life is tough, toughen up!” I know my mom witnessed the women in her life struggle and overcome. I watched my mom with her challenges and she always came through with a smile and incredible joy. So often we are hyper focused on ourselves that we don’t take a moment to pause and look at who created the paths on which we walk.

I’m so grateful for this post that made me think about these amazing women. I wish I had my Grandma Fisk and Great grandmother Heid to know more about their lives, their struggles and their joy. They shaped my mom, who was hard working, kind and always joyful. I am beyond grateful for the strong women who blazed the trail for me and my sisters. My mom was right, life is tough but each hurdle we overcome with grace makes us stronger and ready for the next one. If we can work hard, have a heartful of gratitude then we are incredibly blessed.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Running towards the finish line!

I have never run a marathon or even a 5k. I have, however, been a runner for most of my life. Maybe a jogger, I’m not sure of the difference but I have always liked to run.  For decades I would run a few miles a few times a week.  In recent  years, I have done much more hiking and walking and a lot less running. I have to say that writing this book feels like running.

Getting started my legs felt like cement and the writing process was painfully slow. Whether you are running or writing, starting is always the hardest part of anything new we take on. Starting the book in January was daunting and filled with self doubt, stress, and deadlines that I was unsure I would make. Each new page felt uncertain and tentative. I have never heard my “negative Nancy” so loud in my head before. Usually I can keep her quiet but when the book began Nancy really ran on about how I couldn’t do this. Half of my energy was used silencing her never ending loop in my head.

After a while, my footing became steady and that negative voice slowly drifted away. Little by little my pace picked up, my confidence increased and I was keeping pace with the publisher’s deadlines. There were moments when I felt like a real runner again hitting my stride. Never fast but slowly and steadily making each mark, until I didn’t. I missed two deadlines. Not by too much, but it felt like a huge personal setback. The mental piece of starting again when you feel like you have fallen was much harder than I anticipated. Picking yourself up again and taking just one step forward was not easy, but I did. Each time I was proud of myself for moving ahead.

Now, as I am rounding the corner and see the finish line after literally just completing Chapter 11! I am on the home stretch, one chapter to go. So close to the finish I can practically see it! It is so crazy to fathom that when I began I didn’t know how long it was going to take me to get to my destination. Making the time to fit this book into my life has been a huge challenge. I’m so grateful to all of you with your patience as I have juggled the nonprofit, the podcast, this blog and the book in addition to life. It hasn’t been easy but like all challenges the reward comes from the hard work put into it.

Instead of sharing the final podcast for Season Seven, I am going to keep running towards that finish line and Chapter 12. My goal is to finish before the 4th of July and then finish Season Seven of the podcast the week after. Then another week of camp and a little break to catch my breath. Hoping to launch Season 8 of the podcast in August. Whew! So much to do and to look forward too. Thank you all for standing on the sidelines and cheering me on. So grateful for each of you and the movement we are creating together in making our world a better place.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Dirty Windows

I had my windows washed for the first time in a long time. This is not newsworthy, of that I am aware. What is worth a conversation is how could I live that long without seeing clearly? It is actually astounding that day by day and week by week and month by month all the dog slobber, grit smudging and pollen built up went unnoticed.  I am obviously not a clean freak and talking in metaphors. Everyday I think I am looking at the world clearly until one day I wake up and realize I hadn’t really seen anything clearly, until I did.

Getting my windows washed was my birthday gift to myself and honestly, it was the perfect gift. Yes, the light is amazing and everything just seems cleaner. More than that, as I celebrate another lap around the sun, I feel ready to move forward in this new year ahead with clarity. We can accumulate a lot of build up in a year of life. Each day a little something sticks to us that we don’t see and then a little more until one day we decide it’s time to get rid of it.

There are many things that build up over time. Friendships that slip away because you let another day go by without picking up the phone, time with aging parents that you let escape you, one cookie too many I may have decided to eat…each of these tiny decisions builds up and over time creates a lack of clarity. Yes, what’s one cookie? I’ll call her tomorrow. My parents are fine, I’ll check in later….until you can’t and your clothes don’t fit.

None of us are perfect and none of us make perfect decisions everyday. I’ll choose the cookie almost eveytime…is the right choice? Maybe.  Each choice we make is like cleaning our dirty windows. We can choose to see what really matters or we can put it off until it’s too late. So with that I am eating the cookie, walking with my dad, calling my friends and trying oh so hard to choose what matters. I am also enjoying my squeaky clean view.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Episode 78: Words Matter

Many of us grew up with the childhood slogan of, ” Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me.” Hundreds of years later we now know that they actually can.  Words can cause long lasting scars on our children as nonprofit founder, Jessica Bondy shares with us with today’s inspirational conversation about the power of our words. Join us for an enlightening discussion from across the pond about this amazing new nonprofit, Words Matter.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Words Matter does?

Jessica Bondy: Words Matter is the first organization in the world focused solely on addressing the issue of verbal abuse of children by adults. It is so pervasive, it goes so unnoticed and not properly recognized. Yet it affects two in five children. And of that two in five children over half experienced verbal abuse by adults weekly, and one in turn every single day of their lives. Hearing words to blame, shame, belittle, criticize, and it’s not just shouting and screaming, it can be quite insidious, and subtle.

And I think that the thing that is most concerning about childhood verbal abuse by adults, is the life long damage it can do to children. Because words matter. They stick, they last a lifetime. They shape who we are and who we become. So we are on a mission to end verbal abuse of children by adults.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Words Matter?

Jessica Bondy: I set it up having spent decades in communication, and working for some of the biggest brands in the world Samsung, British Airways, FedEx, Procter and Gamble, working as director and MD of some big firms and then setting up my own agency.  I also coached and mentored a lot of young people helping them realize their potential.  I did a course all about women finding their voices and speaking up and I had a eureka moment. This eureka moment came on when we were given a topic to talk about with this group of women all on zoom from around the world. The topic was if you are going to die in the next six months, what do you want your legacy to be?

This thing came from me out of nowhere.  And I said, “If I’m going to die in the next six months, I don’t want my legacy to be that I am a good aunt. I don’t want my legacy being that I’m a communication specialist. And I don’t want my legacy being that I coach and mentor young people to help realize their potential.” I don’t want it to be on the good old, I’m a communication specialist, or mentor young people, even though all of those things don’t too many people would be hugely worthwhile and satisfied, right? I looked down the barrel of the camera on my Zoom computer. And I said, “If  I’m going to die in the next six months, I want to end verbal abuse of children by adults, because words matter.”

Wow. And I said this, because of my own lived experience and was getting so locked in my head. So many of the people I coached had been so impacted by what they’d heard when they were growing up.

I think what’s so fascinating with what I’m doing now, and Words Matter, it kind of all makes sense. Because there I was communicating on behalf of businesses and brands, then I was helping young people communicate, and market themselves. Now I feel I’m almost the voice of children say, enough is enough words matter.  I feel it is my purpose, I strongly believe that the only reason I’m on this planet is to do this thing.  I just don’t want it to be that way for the next generations and generations to come.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Jessica Bondy:  I think part of the challenge is when you believe something incredibly passionate yourself, and there are people that don’t necessarily believe in what your cause is.  And I found there’s a real dichotomy of people that get it. I’ve had people who’ve literally burst into tears and said, Oh, gosh, I haven’t spoken to my father since I was 14. It’s so brilliant, you’re doing something about this.

I think the other very challenging thing, given the environment we are in today is fundraising is very, very hard. Because particularly if you’re a new charity, because so many funders want to be reassured that you’re going to succeed. And if you’re new and different,  it’s hard. When I ran my own agency, and people were buying the services they were getting something in return. Philanthropy is very, very different. People are doing it because they believe in your cause. They believe that you’re gonna make a difference in the world.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Jessica Bondy: I think what fuels me is an absolute passion and belief in the need for this to happen in the world.  Actually, knowing  what I’m doing is changing people’s behavior. So that fuels me knowing that we can make a difference.

I think the other thing that fuels me is this incredible network of experts, supporters, and my fellow trustees, who have that belief, that you’ve cracked so many nuts, you’ll be able to crack this.  I feel like I’ve kind of got almost a rocket of support underneath me to try and make it a success.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Jessica Bondy: September 2023, our website went live.  We released the findings of our children survey and the most helpful and hurtful words that children said.  We have  three pillars, research and what we see is in terms of delivering outcomes, and outputs with data validation of the scale and impact. Then the next  pillar is about awareness. And that’s trying to change perception and increase understanding and awareness.

Then the other thing we’re developing is training, education and information. We developed some resources on how to talk to children, from adults, for parents, for teachers, those with lived experience.   We had the first international conference on childhood verbal abuse with University College London and the World Health Organization, we had over 1300 people registered to attend and actually 98% said it had made them they’d found it useful, and they would apply the information to their learning to their jobs. Over 90% said it would change their own their own behavior.

It’s called Words Matter, impact and prevention of childhood verbal abuse.  So we’ve developed this program, we’re piloting it.  Hopefully, it’ll be extended through our network of partners. So we’ve got a number of different leading charities supporting our mission, who are service providers, and we’re hoping to do the training through them and their networks.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Jessica Bondy:  if I could dream, any dream it would be that in everybody’s public consciousness, they would think about, be aware of, and acknowledge the harm that words adults say to children can have. They don’t understand it. What I think is so interesting is, as soon as you ask adults themselves to think about what they remember, when they were a child, so many, the vast vast majority can remember what was said to them that built them up. And what and who said it to them that knocked them down. But they don’t somehow apply it to their own lives when they are an adult. Right, that kind of disconnect. So I’d like widespread acknowledgement of it.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Jessica Bondy: So often in life one tries to mold oneself into something to be liked, approved or understood by someone and it just it never feels comfortable. One should  surround oneself with radiators, not drains.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Jessica Bondy: I’m somebody that is a survivor.  I think I’m quite a resilient person. And resilience is so important.  I just think it’s about somehow dusting yourself off if you have a knock back. It’s not easy to do. People who experienced verbal abuse or any form of abuse is that you just need one or two people in your life that really build a venue that really believe in you that you can talk to, and get that support for.

We all know it’s so important to have that connection and support from a very, very young age.  I’ve had a few people in my life who I feel have really been there for me and who really believed in me. At the end of the day, we all want to be seen and heard, for who we are and valued for who we are.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.