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From Setback to Purpose: The Remarkable Story of Hal Hargrave

September is Spinal Cord Injury Awareness Month, and some stories are simply too powerful not to share again. Over the years, I have had the privilege of meeting hundreds of remarkable humans through Charity Matters. Each person has inspired me in a different way. However, every once in a while, someone comes along whose energy, wisdom, passion, and light stay with you long after the conversation ends. Hal Hargrave is one of those people. I first shared Hal’s story in 2021, and I have never forgotten our conversation. After a tragic accident left him paralyzed, Hal stopped asking, “Why me?” and began asking, “Why not me?” That shift changed everything. Through the Be Perfect Foundation, he transformed an unimaginable setback into a life of purpose, helping hundreds of people living with paralysis find resources, independence, community, and hope.

In honor of Spinal Cord Injury Awareness Month, it feels like the perfect time to revisit Hal’s extraordinary story. If you have read his words but never heard his voice, take a listen. His passion is better than caffeine, his perspective is contagious, and his message is one we all need from time to time. Hal reminds us that sometimes the very thing we believe will limit us becomes the thing that propels us forward. His story is about so much more than paralysis. It is about choice, purpose, hope, and what can happen when we decide to use what life gives us to serve others. Hal Hargrave is living proof.

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what the Be Perfect Foundation does?

Hal Hargrave:Be Perfect Foundation–provides direct financial and emotional aid to individuals with paralysis. The foundation approves scholarships for everyday medical necessities such as; medical supplies, wheelchairs, home, and car adaptations, medical equipment, and exercise-based therapy.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start  Be Perfect Foundation?

Hal Hargrave:  Shortly after I got injured, I remember lying in my hospital bed and coming to the realization that with every individual that walked through my hospital room, that each individual that left my room and left the hospital took away a mindset, approach, mentality, and went about the rest of their day emotionally in a state that was directly predicated towards my mood state, mental state, and how well I was emotionally coping with my injury and circumstance.

 I came to a quick realization that I could give each and every individual a positive takeaway that could set the tone of their day for the rest of their life. Finally, I came to the consensus that each and every decision that I made about how I was going to treat, talk to, and share moments with individuals was going to directly affect them either negatively or positively.  I was not willing to be a part of the simple idea that I could negatively influence somebody’s life any longer.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Hal Hargrave: I believe that this is meaningful and purposeful work. I’ve stopped asking “why me” and I’ve started asking “why not me?” Once I came to the realization that this happened “for me” and started looking through the lens that I “get to”  do what I’m doing in my life. I started realizing that maybe this really is a blessing. That the life that I’m living is far bigger than just me and is for me.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Hal Hargrave: I know I have made a difference in this world when others see differences in their world being realized. When other’s dreams come true, their goals are achieved, and happiness is obtained. 

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had?

Hal Hargrave: The success that we’ve had over the past 14 years of a philanthropic mindset as a family and as a community has been nothing short of amazing. We have raised over $7 million for individuals suffering from paralysis. This does not include the resource of hope that we have built through being a physical, literal, and emotional resource to those who are in need.

Charity Matters: What has your impact been? 

Hal Hargrave: Our impact has changed lives. Over the past 14 years $7 million and well north of 500 people and families. It has changed lives in the way that people live independently. How people live without despair any longer because they see hope and much more. The financial support that we provide to individuals to seek out therapeutic options has allowed them to achieve a healthier form of themselves. Having their health has contributed towards staying out of the hospital as well as finding a network of people that they can relate to. We provide a place where they will not give up, and emotionally being in a place where they see that their contributions to society and to others are life-changing.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Hal Hargrave: My dream is for us to get to a place where we have an endowment. An endowment would ensure that we would be around for life. Ideally, if this endowment was established, we would be able to continue to provide scholarships. This foundation should be around forever.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Hal Hargrave: One of the major life lessons that I’ve learned from this experience is the things that we think limit us just might be the platform that we need to propel ourselves forward to actually helping create change.  We always think that we have it worse.  However, maybe life gave us an opportunity, not a setback.

When we start looking at life through a lens that maybe something was preventing us from something even worse happening, we start to live with the appreciation that we have a second chance. Sometimes these circumstances that put us into a deep, dark, and physically disabling place, actually are the opportunities that give us the tools that we need to create change in others’ lives. You don’t need to create change through physical activity. You can create change through intentionality, sincerity, words, and advocacy.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Hal Hargrave: This journey has changed everything for me. I will be honest with you, 14 years ago I did not think that my life would amount to anything. I was under the impression that my physical setbacks in life would propel me into a place of a life that was meaningless, hopeless, and unfulfilled. What has happened over the past 14 years, which has not been easy, and has not been because of the lack of tenacity, trying, and getting up with purpose, has been nothing short of a dream could true.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Charity Profile

Episode 109: Pacer Nation

Sometimes making a difference begins with something as simple as putting one foot in front of the other. More than three decades ago, chiropractor Steve Smith invited a group of patients to meet him at the Rose Bowl. His goal was simply to help people feel better through movement. However, something unexpected happened along the way. A running program became a community, strangers became friends, and the Pasadena Pacers grew into Pacer Nation.

What I love most about Steve’s story is that it really isn’t about running. Instead, it is about connection, kindness, service and the power of showing up for one another. His message is also beautifully simple: You don’t need to know every step before you begin. You simply need to take the first one. I think you will love this joyful and inspiring conversation.

CHARITY MATTERS: TELL US A LITTLE ABOUT WHAT THE PASADENA PACERS DOES?

Steve Smith:  The Pasadena Pacers started out as the Pasadena Pacers, now Pacer Nation. Our goal is to raise the health and spirits of communities by getting people together with social exercise programs.

It started as a program from my office as a chiropractor. We thought it was a marathon training program. It turned out to be a social program. People come for the training, and they stay for the social benefits. The programs are all free and volunteer-led. We have a team of probably 35 people that helps run the organization. We’re always looking for people to volunteer with coaching, putting out water stations and doing websites.

We did a great job with diabetes, cardiovascular disease, obesity, depression and the big one, loneliness.

CHARITY MATTERS: WHAT EXPERIENCES DID YOU HAVE AS A CHILD THAT INFLUENCED YOUR WORK?

Steve Smith:  Service started for me as a child. My mom was always the den mother, the person who helped out in the classroom. She did the Cub Scouts. She volunteered at Rancho Los Amigos, where we went as kids and saw people in iron lungs who had polio.

We would always help out the neighbors. We’d take out the old people’s trash cans or put the weeds away at Mrs. Irwin’s house up the street because she got too old to bend over. As a child, I think that was great training because it made me feel good.

Later, it became apparent to me that helping others is really its own reward. In some ways, I discovered early on that giving help is probably the reward in and of itself. The receiving of it is probably even less powerful than the giving of it.

My dad was a World War II vet. In those days, we considered it kind of our duty to serve in the military. So I joined the Army, served a couple of years and went to Vietnam.

It was eye-opening to go to a different country and see the kinds of hardships people have. However, in all that struggle and strife, they could still have family meals together. When a marriage happened in a village in Vietnam, the entire community would come to celebrate.

What you have, who you know or what your station in life is didn’t matter. What mattered was the community was a single thriving unit. In the middle of a war, people could find a way to be happy by getting together and supporting each other.

CHARITY MATTERS: WHAT WAS THE MOMENT YOU KNEW YOU NEEDED TO ACT AND START PACER NATION?

Steve Smith: The Pacers started out of my chiropractic office. In the ’90s, people went into offices, sat down in chairs and started looking at their computer stations. Neck and back problems were insolvable, which was great for business. However, it wasn’t great for my feeling that I was making a difference.

I had been a pretty fast runner when I was younger and had a terrible back injury. I was involved in an aviation incident where I broke my back. I didn’t run for almost a year and a half after that, and the back pain just wouldn’t go away.

I thought, “Well, I’ve settled into chronic back pain that’s not going to resolve. I’m going to start running again.” I started back slowly. Within just a few weeks, my back pain went away. I thought, “Wow, what is going on here?” Nobody ever said this could happen. In fact, the predominant wisdom of the day said that if you have any problem at all, don’t run. That turned out not to be true for me.

At the same time, I had all these patients with neck and back problems. I thought, “Well, it might work for them too.” So I invited people to meet my wife and me at the Rose Bowl. Most people said, “I’m not a runner. I’m not an athlete.” I said, “If I can get you to run very slowly for one minute, way below your ability level, could you do that?”

We had about 30 or 40 people show up. We ran for one minute and walked for five. Each week, we progressed. After ten weeks, people were starting to get fit. They were starting to have results, and they were looking forward to their Sunday morning workout.

CHARITY MATTERS: WHAT ARE YOUR BIGGEST CHALLENGES?

Steve Smith:  Probably 15 years passed before we became a nonprofit. By then, money started exchanging hands, and there were advantages you could get from having a nonprofit. We decided it was time. At that point, maybe three or four hundred people were meeting each week. Five or six run clubs had also started to sprout here and there.

Interestingly, fundraising wasn’t one of our big challenges because run clubs don’t need much money. We needed a little for a website and insurance, but not much else. For fundraising, we used a simple green can where people put money. Those donations bought bagels and water. At the end of the year, if there was money left over, we threw a party.

What fascinated me about the green can was that you got to be a philanthropist if you put three dollars into it. That’s a very different experience than having to spend two or three hundred dollars a year to participate and having an expectation of exchange.

Instead, the person making that contribution gets to be generous. With one dollar in a green can, they buy generosity, kindness and giving. I thought that was the most powerful thing.

CHARITY MATTERS: WHAT FUELS YOU TO KEEP DOING THIS WORK?

Steve Smith: Eventually, nonprofit founders discover that you don’t create the community as much as the community creates you. During a run, people share their stories. They talk about challenges, victories, families and how it is at work. It’s great to get all that stuff out and have a rapid exchange of ideas and real conversation.

On Saturday morning, you’re simply dressed in a way that you’re not identifiable by what you have, what you do, where you go or what your car is. All that social veneer dissolves through the experience of running. Because of that, people connect in a way they ordinarily wouldn’t be able to. Sometimes, just sharing the same space with a person for a few miles, even without words, can make you feel very connected.

Some of the best relationships we have are the ones where you can be together in silence. It’s great to be that way with your community too.

CHARITY MATTERS: WHEN DO YOU KNOW YOU HAVE MADE A DIFFERENCE?

Steve Smith:  For me, impact happens in two ways. The first is on a personal level. Completing a program, especially a marathon, is a long-term goal. You may train for a year, and there are obstacles. Your body doesn’t want to do a marathon. Mentally and emotionally, you feel like, “Wow, that’s a lot to confront.” Physically, you have to change.

At the finish line, something really quite extraordinary happens. People who finish their first marathon shatter barriers. After overcoming those extreme obstacles, they begin to look around and ask, “What else did I think was probably not achievable that I should reexamine? What more could I do?”

Suddenly, horizons open. A future becomes possible that, at least in their own minds, wouldn’t have been possible before.

CHARITY MATTERS: TELL US WHAT SUCCESS YOU HAVE HAD AND WHAT YOUR IMPACT HAS BEEN?

Steve Smith: The second kind of impact is a little more subtle. I think the Pacers has an impact on the community. When we talk to people about putting on that red shirt, we tell them to give somebody a smile, wave hello and say something positive. For goodness’ sake, get all dogs to greet you. If you can’t get a baby to smile, you need to work on your spirit.

Running through a community can be a little bit of a disruption. You’re going through neighborhoods early in the morning, and sometimes you impact traffic a little bit. Because of that, we try to get people to say hello, wave and smile.

Then, take that show on the road. Bring it into your daily workplace, your family and your friendships. Smile and create a reaction. Go out and raise the spirits of your community in some subtle way. Get a smile, give a smile and say something positive.

CHARITY MATTERS: IF YOU COULD DREAM ANY DREAM FOR YOUR ORGANIZATION, WHAT WOULD THAT BE?

Steve Smith:  Probably 20 years ago, I had a dream to see a Pacers Club in every community in the world.

I’d like to see Pacers in Palestine and Israel and have races together. Ultimately, I want to cause world peace to break out and people to love each other in a way that expands the consciousness of humankind and creates a glorious human race. I know that’s probably a little high-minded.

For a long time, I was a little disheartened by our progress. We only started maybe 12 clubs. Then, in the last five years, something happened. The era of run clubs emerged. Now, it’s a place where young people go to meet each other. Run clubs are replacing things like online dating apps. Instead of going to places, consuming alcohol and being drowned by loud music, people go out and run together.

They’re having real conversations and doing something meaningful. I’ve seen it happen in Pasadena, and it’s gone worldwide. It’s the emergence and birth of the run club. Who knew it?

CHARITY MATTERS: WHAT LIFE LESSONS HAVE YOU LEARNED FROM THIS EXPERIENCE?

Steve Smith:  Sometimes, when you have a concept or an idea, you won’t know what step two is until you do step one. For me, step one is to raise your hand, step forward and say three words: “I’ll do it.”

I can’t stress that enough because you have no idea what your future is going to be. The minute you start moving forward, a wind comes to your back. Doors begin to open, and a future opens before you that you couldn’t have thought of until you got started.

Once you know the first thing, do that one thing. Now you’re in motion. From there, the universe is going to help you go to a place where you probably couldn’t even have dreamt of.

Bring the skills you have to the table. They’re probably not going to be sufficient to do every job. However, people will line up behind you. They’ll start supporting you, they’ll help, and you’ll learn.

CHARITY MATTERS: HOW HAS THIS JOURNEY CHANGED YOU?

Steve Smith:  I’ve remained the same, and I didn’t know who I was. More than anything, this experience has taught me a lot about leadership. No two leaders are the same. They all do it differently.

Over the years, we’ve had, I think, 22 presidents of the Pasadena Pacers. As the founder, I’ve worked with all of them and learned from all of them. Watching these leaders has made me a much more successful businessman. I’ve also been more successful with my family and learned things about myself by watching others.

You should be happy with yourself, but I can also stand to be a little bit more like you. If I were to pick the best traits of each person and have that be a composite, wow, you’d be much better.

As a leader, you get to watch, observe and take the best pieces. Sometimes advice doesn’t equal watching somebody do something and seeing some amazing exchange that makes you think, “Wow, if I were to behave like that, look at what I could do.”

That’s why I think community service is so valuable. You learn from others. You discover pieces of yourself that are underdeveloped, and those pieces can expand and make you a better person.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration

Episode 106: Bags of Fun

There are moments in life when joy feels out of reach…..especially for children facing illness, fear, and the unknown. And yet, what if something as simple as a bag filled with imagination, play, and possibility could transform that moment? In this heartfelt episode of the Charity Matters Podcast, we explore the powerful story behind Bags of Fun.…..an organization built on the belief that every child deserves joy, even in the midst of life’s hardest battles. This is a story about showing up, about seeing a need others might overlook, and about choosing to bring light into dark places.

What makes this episode so compelling is not just the mission, but the heart behind it. It reminds us that service doesn’t have to be complicated to be life-changing. Sometimes, the greatest impact comes from meeting people exactly where they are with compassion, creativity, and care. This conversation will inspire you to think differently about what it means to make a difference and will leave you asking yourself a simple but powerful question: What can I do, right where I am, to bring joy to someone else?

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Bags of Fun does?

Tammy Krause: Bags of Fun are big backpacks full of toys that are very intentional for kids with long-term and life-threatening illnesses. That’s the simple explanation, but really they are custom-created for each child. We started with kids with cancer and quickly expanded to children in the hospital with other medical conditions from kidney dialysis to major organ transplants to chronic illnesses.

Every bag is made specifically for that child. We get lists directly from hospitals, so each bag is age, gender, and diagnosis specific. They aren’t sitting in a warehouse. Each one includes about 17 to 18 items things that are fun, educational, manipulative, something a child can do alone and something they can do with others.

More recently, we’ve expanded into adolescent mental health. In 2021, Colorado declared a state of emergency for youth mental health, and we stepped in to serve that population as well. Those bags are designed differently, but with the same intention…..to bring comfort, engagement, and ultimately, joy.

Charity Matters: What experiences did you have as a child that influenced your work?

Tammy Krause: I was very blessed growing up. I was surrounded by amazing women…..teachers, nurses, people who gave back constantly. Giving was just part of our life. When we went school supply shopping, we always bought extra for other kids. At Christmas, we would go caroling at public hospitals.

My mom actually ran a nonprofit, and she was heavily involved with CASA, advocating for abused children. So I learned very early how important it was to give back.

I used to make fun of her because she signed every single donor letter personally. And now I find myself encouraging the exact same thing. Those early role models shaped everything.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Bags of Fun?

Tammy Krause: My daughter Gabby was diagnosed with a brain tumor the day before her fifth birthday. She was the middle of four kids. Because of my background in special education, we created a bag for her to take back and forth to the hospital filled with things to keep her engaged and connected to her siblings.

She called it her “bag of fun.” We were very blessed during her treatment with incredible community support. But Gabby noticed something she asked why the other kids didn’t have a bag like hers. So we told her that when she finished treatment, we would make Bags of Fun for other kids.

Unfortunately, she never finished treatment. She was sent home on hospice and passed away about a month later. Three weeks after she passed, I had my first meeting. I didn’t know exactly how to do it, but I knew I had to. We started with volunteers, and the organization was run entirely by volunteers for the first two years.

This was her idea. I was just following through on what she wanted.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Tammy Krause: In the early days, the challenges were everything grief, raising my kids, and starting a nonprofit all at once. My youngest was four, my oldest was ten. But there was also so much healing and community around it.

Our community stepped up in incredible ways. Friends, neighbors, volunteers everyone wanted to help. Our first fundraiser, which we still do 21 years later, was a big family event where everyone came together. Like any nonprofit, the challenges were figuring out events, fundraising, logistics…..but we were very clear about our mission. We were doing one thing: creating custom bags for sick children. That clarity helped.

As we’ve grown, the challenge has shifted. Now it’s about staying focused, being intentional, and not losing sight of our core mission while we expand.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Tammy Krause: The very first bag we delivered told us everything. It was for a little boy named Garrison. He was so excited he could hardly stand it. That moment we knew we were making a difference.

And honestly, it’s the joy. Joy has become a tool. We used to say play is the best medicine, but it’s bigger than that. Joy can exist alongside heartbreak and grief. You can walk into a hospital room with a terrible diagnosis, and joy can still be there.

When you can bring that joy into those spaces, that’s what fuels you. And it’s not just for the kids it’s for families, volunteers, everyone involved. Joy connects all of us.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Tammy Krause: You see it in the smiles. You see it in the relief on a parent’s face. Stories like Garrison’s……he came back years later asking for a new backpack because his had finally worn out and that’s impact you can’t measure.

We’ve given out over 17,000 bags, but numbers only tell part of the story. The real difference is in those moments of connection and joy. And honestly, it’s also in our volunteers. Watching people come in and build bags kids, grandparents, entire families and seeing their excitement, that’s impact too. It’s creating a community around service.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Tammy Krause: We can measure success in numbers…17,000 bags, how many we deliver weekly, the cost of each bag but the true impact is much deeper. We’ve expanded into multiple cities, Kansas City and Omaha, and we’ve grown into mental health services, which now actually exceed our medical bags in demand.

Our impact is also in the communities we’ve built. Volunteers of all ages come together, and they leave feeling connected and inspired. All the pieces fundraising, volunteers, hospitals come together to make it work. That’s what success looks like.

CHARITY MATTERS: IF YOU COULD DREAM ANY DREAM FOR YOUR ORGANIZATION, WHAT WOULD THAT BE?

Tammy Krause: There are always dreams. We want to expand to serve more hospitals, more children, more communities. But at the same time, we have to protect the integrity of what we do. Every bag has to remain intentional and impactful.

One of my bigger dreams is actually creating a nonprofit space a place where organizations can host events and gather. There’s a real need for that, especially in Colorado. And beyond that, I believe in collaboration. There’s enough to go around. We need to “play nice in the sandbox” with other nonprofits and support each other.

That’s a big part of the dream too ….building community across organizations.

CHARITY MATTERS: WHAT LIFE LESSONS HAVE YOU LEARNED FROM THIS EXPERIENCE?

Tammy Krause: One of the biggest lessons is staying focused and intentional. As you grow, it’s easy to get pulled in different directions, but you have to remember why you started. Another is that we’re here to support each other. That’s really what leadership is about.

I’ve also learned the importance of celebrating. We’re always looking ahead, but it’s important to pause and recognize what we’ve accomplished. And especially with our work in mental health, I’ve learned how critical it is to adapt while staying true to your mission. The need is real, and it’s growing.

CHARITY MATTERS: HOW HAS THIS JOURNEY CHANGED YOU?

Tammy Krause: I think I’ve learned that everyone has a story. Every person who comes into our organization donor, volunteer, or family brings their own experience with them.

I hope I’ve become more patient. I’ve learned to trust the community more and to trust that things will work out. In the beginning, it felt like everything had to happen right away. Now I trust that Bags of Fun will continue. We’ve been here for over 20 years it’s not going anywhere.

Letting go and trusting the process has been a big change for me. And understanding that things will change but that’s okay. Because at the end of the day, we’re here to serve. And that’s what matters most.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Causes

Episode 104: The Power of Sight

What if the moment that changed your life… became the reason you changed someone else’s?

In this week’s Charity Matters Podcast, Episode 104: The Power of Sight, we meet Gianny Cardenas, founder of Power of Sight, a mobile nonprofit bringing vision care directly to underserved communities. But this story is about so much more than glasses. It’s about loss, faith, and the unexpected way purpose can emerge from pain. After the tragic loss of his mother, Gianny found himself searching for healing and what he discovered was that by helping others see, he began to see his own life differently.

This powerful conversation is a reminder that sometimes the greatest impact begins with simply noticing and seeing a need, seeing a person, and choosing to act. From serving over 20,000 people to transforming the lives of children who can finally see clearly for the first time, Gianny’s journey will inspire you to ask: What am I being called to see? Because one small act of awareness can lead to one life-changing act of kindness…and that is how we change the world, one person at a time.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Power of Sight does?

Gianny Cardenas: Power of Sight is a 501(c)(3) faith-based nonprofit organization, and what we do is bring optometry and vision services directly to the community. We’re a mobile nonprofit, so we go to where the need is; to schools, churches, and community events. Then we provide eye exams and glasses, often on the same day.

A big part of our work is in Title I schools. We screen entire student bodies, and statistically about 25% of students will fail those screenings. Those are the students we bring back for full eye exams with licensed doctors. What makes us unique is that we don’t just diagnose, we solve the problem right there. We have a mobile lab, so students can choose their frames and leave with glasses the same day.

At the end of the day, it’s about removing a barrier. Something as simple as a pair of glasses can change a child’s ability to learn, their confidence, and their future.

Charity Matters: What experiences did you have as a child that influenced your work?

Gianny Cardenas:  I’ve been in the optical world for over 20 years. It was actually one of my first jobs out of high school while I was in college. I worked part-time at a corporate optometry office, and one of my tasks was to call families who had received vouchers from the Lions Club for free eye exams.

No one wanted to make those calls, but I remember doing it and hearing the excitement from parents and grandparents. They were so grateful just to get their kids in for an exam and glasses. At the time, I didn’t realize it, but that experience stayed with me.

Looking back now, I can see how that planted a seed. Just hearing how much something so simple meant to people, it impacted me more than I knew at the time.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Power of Sight?

Gianny Cardenas:  There was definitely a moment, but it came through a lot of pain first.

In 2016, my mom passed away in a tragic accident. She was one of 13 people who died in a bus crash. She was the backbone of our family, and losing her changed everything for me. I fell into depression, anxiety and everything you can think of. I tried therapy, medication, different ways to cope, but nothing really filled that void.

Eventually, I reconnected with an old pastor who helped me through that time. Through prayer and faith, I started to feel peace again. And when that shift happened, I began to see the world differently. Relationships mattered more. People mattered more. Everything looked different.

A couple of years later, I told my wife, “Why don’t we start a nonprofit?” I had always thought about it, but this time it felt real. I wanted to combine everything I knew about optical work with my faith and bring it into the community. In 2020, we started Power of Sight with about 100 donated frames and no doctors—just a vision to serve.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Gianny Cardenas: There are a lot of challenges, especially starting in 2020 during COVID. At first, it was just trying to figure out how to balance everything; my full-time job, my family, and starting a nonprofit.

My wife has been with me from the beginning, and we’ve built this together. We travel a lot for clinics, and we actually homeschool our daughters so they can be with us. Finding that work-life balance has been one of the biggest challenges, but also one of the biggest blessings.

On the operational side, there’s a lot people don’t see…..the insurance, costs, staffing, working with schools, compliance. A lot of it came out of my own pocket in the beginning. I didn’t know if we’d have donors or sponsors. We just moved forward by faith.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Gianny Cardenas:  For me, it’s my faith in God. That’s where I get my strength.

When we started, I thought we’d maybe do one event a month and help 50 people. But it’s grown into something much bigger. We now have staff, 25 doctors, partnerships with school districts and it’s expanded beyond what I expected.

What really fuels me are the moments when we’re serving people. Seeing a child put on glasses for the first time or a parent’s reaction and that’s everything. Those moments remind me why we’re doing this.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Gianny Cardenas: There was one moment that really stayed with me.

We were at a school, and my dad, who comes with me to clinics, noticed a young girl who reminded him of one of my daughters. She had never had an eye exam before, and her prescription was extremely high. She couldn’t really see the world clearly.

Her mom was emotional and asked if she could get a backup pair of glasses. We said yes, of course. When my dad gave her the glasses, the mom just hugged him and started crying. That was the first time I had seen my dad emotional since my mom passed.

Later that day, I told my wife that everything we had gone through…..the process of starting the nonprofit, the expenses, the challenges and it was all worth it for that one moment.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Gianny Cardenas: In the last five years, we’ve helped over 20,000 people and provided 20,000 pairs of glasses. That’s a huge milestone for us, especially considering where we started. But beyond the numbers, the real impact is in the lives we’re changing.

When a child can see the board for the first time, their confidence improves, their grades improve, and their whole experience in school changes. There are studies that show students can improve academically just from getting glasses. We’ve also responded to community needs in crisis situations. During the fires in Altadena and Pacific Palisades, we mobilized quickly and helped 1,200 people with vision care in just six days.

Impact isn’t just numbers…..it’s those individual stories and moments.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Gianny Cardenas:  My dream is to be in every school district in California and eventually expand nationwide.

Our program is scalable. Once we have the doctors, equipment, and partnerships in place, we can serve thousands more children. There are so many students right now who are undiagnosed and untreated, especially in underserved communities.

If we can reach them, we can change their future.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Gianny Cardenas: One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is the importance of communication.

I used to be someone who worked behind the scenes. But in this work, you have to communicate your story, your mission, what you’re doing. Whether it’s with donors, partners, or the community, communication is key. It also applies personally. During my grief, opening up and talking about what I was going through was a big part of healing.

Another lesson is realizing that you don’t know everything, and that’s okay. I’ve had to rely on professionals such as; attorneys, accountants, mentors….and build a team.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Gianny Cardenas: The biggest change happened after losing my mom and growing in my faith. That’s what shifted my perspective and changed how I see the world. But since starting the nonprofit, I’ve also changed in how I approach responsibility. We now have staff, doctors, and families who depend on this work. That’s something I don’t take lightly.

It’s made me more intentional, more transparent, and more focused on doing things the right way. At the same time, I see it as a blessing……to be able to serve others and create opportunities for people to provide for their families through this work.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Charity Profile

Episode 103: Walk with Me Brother

Some stories ask you to listen. Others ask you to feel. And then there are the rare ones, like this one, that ask you to walk alongside them. This week on the Charity Matters Podcast, you’ll meet Robb Pollard, a husband, father, entrepreneur, and now the founder of Walk With Me Brother, who is about to do something extraordinary. On Monday, Robb began a 2,500-mile run across America…..not because he’s a runner, not because it’s easy, but because he knows what it feels like to be at the very bottom and wonders if his journey might help someone else choose to stay. This isn’t about miles. It’s about meaning. It’s about one man’s decision to turn pain into purpose and to remind us all that asking for help might be the bravest step we ever take.

By the time this episode airs on Thursday, Robb will already be on the road one step at a time, inviting all of us to come with him. His story is raw, honest, and deeply human. It’s about mental health, about breaking the silence so many men carry, and about the power of simply showing up for one another. If you’ve ever wondered how one person can make a difference, this conversation will stay with you. Because sometimes, changing the world doesn’t start with a grand plan …it starts with one step… and the courage to take it.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Walk With Me Brother does?

Robb Pollard:  Walk With Me Brother is a mental health nonprofit, but I try not to overcomplicate it. At its core, it started with one simple goal: help one person. If I could save one person from taking their own life (most likely a man) then everything I’m doing is worth it.

That’s really it. That’s the mission.

People talk a lot about mental health awareness, but the truth is, we’re already aware. We know what mental health is. What we’re trying to do is take action…real action to prevent suicide. For me, that means creating connection. It means building a brotherhood where people feel safe enough to talk, to open up, to not feel alone.

The run across America is part of that. It’s a way to get attention without destroying myself. It’s a way to show people, especially men, that there is another option. That you can ask for help. That you can choose a different path.

If I have to run 2,500 miles to reach one person, then it’s worth every step.

Charity Matters: What experiences did you have as a child that influenced your work?

Robb Pollard:   I grew up in a small town in England, and it was very community-driven. Everyone knew each other. Neighbors looked out for one another. It wasn’t nonprofit work in the formal sense, but it was people helping people.My grandmother, my Nan, had a big influence on me. She always used to say, “No matter what you’re going through, there’s always someone worse off than you.” That stuck with me. It gave me perspective early on.

As I got older, I naturally gravitated toward helping where I could. When I lived in Shanghai, I worked with an animal rescue and ended up fostering over 100 dogs. I also spent time with an orphanage, which was pretty eye-opening.

But even then, I never thought I’d start a nonprofit. I just thought I’d support causes, donate money, do my bit. Looking back now, all those experiences were shaping me. They were laying the groundwork for something bigger….I just didn’t know it at the time.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Walk With Me Brother?

Robb Pollard: The moment everything changed was when I said three words: I need help.I couldn’t even say it out loud at first. I had to write it in an email to my family. But that was the turning point. I knew that nothing was going to change unless I did something different.

I’d been struggling for a long time with my mental health, with addiction, with feeling like I was never enough. And even when I got sober, there was still that voice in my head. I knew eventually I’d crack if I didn’t do something drastic.

Then I went through ketamine infusion therapy, and during one of the sessions, I had this vision of myself running across America. It wasn’t about ego. It wasn’t about proving anything to anyone else. It was about doing something so big that people would notice and in noticing, maybe they’d realize there’s another way. That idea stuck with me. I couldn’t ignore it.

And once it was there, I knew I had to follow through. That’s when it shifted from just a personal challenge to something bigger….a mission. That’s when Walk With Me Brother really began.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Robb Pollard: I definitely underestimated how hard this would be. Starting a nonprofit is no joke. There’s no clear roadmap, and everything takes more time, more effort, and more consistency than you think. Fundraising alone is a massive challenge we’re trying to raise around $80,000 just to support the run.

Then there’s building the right team. The people around you have to believe in the mission. A lot of the people helping right now have personal stories of loss, struggles, experiences with mental health and that’s what drives them. On a personal level, the biggest challenge is balancing everything. I have a business, a wife, kids, a life. And I’m about to step away from that for a long time to do something that’s physically and mentally demanding.

There are moments where I think, “What am I doing?” But once you commit to something like this, there’s no backing out. You just have to keep going.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Robb Pollard: What keeps me going is the thought that someone might still be here because of this. Maybe a kid still has his dad. Maybe a parent still has their son. That’s what I hold onto.

And then there’s my own family. My kids might not understand this right now, but one day they will. I want them to see that you can push yourself beyond what you think is possible. That you can do hard things.

There’s also something personal in this for me. I’ve never really felt proud of myself. This is about changing that. It’s about proving to myself more than anyone that I can do something meaningful.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Robb Pollard:  If one person chooses to stay because of this, then I’ve made a difference.

That’s success to me. It’s not about numbers, followers, or how much money we raise. It’s about impact. One life is enough.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Robb Pollard:  We’re still early in the journey, but already I’m seeing the impact. People are reaching out. They’re sharing their stories. They’re opening up in ways they haven’t before. That alone tells me this is needed.

The real impact will come over time. We’re building something bigger than just the run it is a community, a brotherhood, a place where people can talk without judgment. We’re also working on future initiatives things like providing access to support for people who can’t afford it, creating local walking communities, and bringing in ideas that have worked in other countries.

This isn’t a one-time event. This is the start of something much bigger.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Robb Pollard: The dream is to create a system where no one feels like they have nowhere to turn. I want Walk With Me Brother to become a community….something people can plug into anywhere. Walks, conversations, meetups. Real connection.

I’d love to see it grow across the country and beyond. I want to go into schools, especially high schools, and talk to young men. If we can reach them early and show them it’s okay to ask for help, we can change outcomes.

Long term, I’d like to create access to real support whether that’s therapy, resources, or just someone to talk to. Something practical, not just awareness.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Robb Pollard: The biggest lesson is that asking for help isn’t weakness it’s strength. There is always someone out there who will help you. You just have to ask.

I’ve also learned that nothing changes unless you change something. You can’t stay stuck and expect things to get better. And I’ve learned how important it is to have the right people around you. This isn’t something you do alone. The people involved in this all have a connection to the mission. That matters.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Robb Pollard: It’s already changing me, and I know the biggest changes are still to come.

I’m someone who’s always been very family-oriented, very comfortable at home. This is pushing me way outside of that. Being away from my family is going to be one of the hardest parts. Physically, it’s going to be tough. But mentally, it’s going to be even tougher.

At the same time, I know that if I can do this, I’ll come out stronger. I’ll know what I’m capable of. And more than anything, I’ll know that I tried to make a difference. Even if it’s just for one person.

Because at the end of the day, that’s all this has ever been about.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Health

I’ve been thinking…

“I’ve been thinking…”

My husband believes those are three very dangerous words. Perhaps he’s right. Over the past few months being unable to walk, being sick, and being tested……I’ve had more time than usual to sit with my thoughts. Life has felt like a funnel, with so much pouring in and only a slow drip coming out the other end.

Lately, it feels as if I’ve been placed in the observation chair and told to sit, listen, and take everything in. No driving, no constant motion…..just observing.  This is unfamiliar territory.

Normally, I’m in the driver’s seat, pedal to the metal, moving full speed ahead. What I’m beginning to understand is that when you move that fast, it’s almost impossible to truly see or hear what’s around you.

From Full Speed to Stillness

Recently, life has gone from sixty to zero.

This season has become a lesson in patience, in slowing down, and in surrender. Accepting help has not come easily. That delicate line between independence and dependence feels thinner than ever.Asking for help feels vulnerable. It stretches every part of who I think I am.

And yet…

Kindness has met me at every turn. Strangers hold doors as I navigate on crutches. Friends show up with meals. Messages, check-ins, and small gestures appear daily, each one meaningful. Being on the receiving end of so much generosity has filled me with gratitude. More than that, it has renewed my belief in humanity.

When we slow down enough, goodness becomes impossible to miss.

When You Can’t Speak, You Listen

One of the greatest lessons during this time has been learning to listen. Not just to my body, but to everything happening around me.

Last week, I collapsed and ended up in the ER. I’m fine now, so no need to worry. Still, the experience left a lasting imprint. As paramedics loaded me into the red truck, everything became blurry. Awareness faded in and out. By the time we reached the emergency room, I couldn’t open my eyes or speak but I could hear everything.

What I heard is something I cannot stop thinking about.

The Woman Behind the Curtain

Inside the ER, doctors and nurses moved quickly around me. Their voices blended into a steady rhythm of urgency and care. Beyond the curtain next to me, another story quietly unfolded.

The patient beside me was an elderly woman. From her voice alone, I could sense her grace, her precise words  and her calm tone. The doctor explained that she needed surgery immediately. Then came a simple question: “Who can we call?”

Silence followed.

After a moment, she said she needed time to think. Gently, she explained that her concern wasn’t who to call. Instead, she worried about who would take care of her cat. My heart broke.

As the doctor and nurse reviewed forms, I could hear her discomfort. Pain slipped through her voice as she responded. A single thought kept repeating in my mind: Who is helping her? Wanting to speak, to advocate, to do something….I couldn’t. Tears streamed down my face as I listened.

A Life of Order, A Moment of Uncertainty

Soon, a social worker arrived. Questions began about the cat….its age, food, medications, and care instructions. Each answer came with remarkable clarity and detail. The woman described exactly where everything was and how it all worked.

Impressed, the social worker commented on her organization. With quiet pride, the woman replied,
“Of course there is a system for everything. I would like you to know, young lady, that I was a librarian for over forty years. Everything has a system.”

In that moment, I could see her clearly. Her life, her order, her independence and her dignity. Still, one question would not leave me…

Who would take her home after surgery?
Was there anyone to check in on her ?
Who would care for her?

The Questions That Stay With Us

That moment has stayed with me. It returns in quiet spaces and unexpected pauses. Beneath it all lies a deeper question:

How does someone end up alone?

Human beings aren’t meant to live in isolation. We are wired for connection, built for community, and designed to belong. But over time, however, connections fade. People move. Life shifts. Loss enters. Gradually, sometimes without notice, the circle grows smaller. Eventually, it can become just one person… and a beloved cat… facing a moment no one should face alone.

The Power of Asking and Receiving

Here is what I keep coming back to and what is dropping out of the funnel. The power of asking for help… and the power of connection. These two forces are deeply intertwined.

During this season, asking for help has stretched me in ways I never expected. What I’ve discovered is that asking doesn’t weaken us but rather it creates space for others to step in with love. Offering help matters just as much. Noticing someone. Reaching out. Showing up before the need is spoken.

Because not everyone can ask.

What We Can Do

So what do we do with this awareness? We reach out, we check in and  we build connection before we need it.  Then we step into someone else’s world when they do. Notice the neighbor you haven’t seen in a while. Call the friend who has gone quiet. Offer to pick up groceries, share a meal, or simply sit and listen.

Connection begins with small choices. Every act of kindness, no matter how simple, carries weight. Sometimes, those small acts are the difference between someone feeling invisible… and someone feeling seen.

A Final Thought

I don’t know what happened to the woman behind the curtain. Whether someone showed up for her. If her cat was cared for. Or whether she had someone waiting on the other side of surgery. What I do know is this:

She changed me.

That moment reminded me that life isn’t about constant motion or endless productivity. True meaning often reveals itself when we pause long enough to notice others. Maybe my husband is right…” I’ve been thinking” can be dangerous.

Because once awareness begins, it doesn’t stop. Once you truly see… you cannot unsee. And what becomes clear is this: We need each other. Always.

In the end, the smallest act of kindness may simply be making sure someone knows they are not alone.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration

World Health Day: Caring for ourselves, Caring for our world

Each year on April 7th, the world pauses to recognize World Health Organization’s World Health Day, a global reminder that our health is our most precious resource. Established in 1950 to commemorate the founding of the World Health Organization, the day highlights critical health issues affecting people around the globe and encourages governments, communities, and individuals to take action toward healthier lives.

But while the name may sound global and grand, the truth is that world health actually begins in very small, very personal places: in our homes, in our neighborhoods, and in the choices we make every single day.

Health is something we often take for granted….until we don’t have it. Whether it’s a sudden diagnosis, an injury that slows us down ( yep)  or watching someone we love struggle with illness, those moments remind us how fragile and precious our well-being truly is. Our health is the foundation that allows us to show up for the people we love, pursue our dreams, and serve others in meaningful ways.

Without our health, everything becomes harder….trust me something I am very aware of these days.

The purpose of World Health Day is not simply to recognize doctors, hospitals, or health organizations….although they certainly deserve our gratitude. It is a call for all of us to take responsibility for our own well-being and for the well-being of our communities. Because health is not just about medicine. It is about lifestyle, environment, connection, and care.

Healthy communities create a healthier world.

When we take care of ourselves we are better equipped to help others. A parent who prioritizes their health can be present for their children. A teacher who protects their well-being can inspire generations of students. A volunteer who feels strong and energized can serve their community with compassion and purpose.

Health creates capacity. In many ways, caring for ourselves is one of the most important acts of service we can offer the world.

Around the globe, access to healthcare, clean water, nutritious food, and safe living conditions remains a challenge for millions of people. These disparities remind us that health is not simply a personal issue but it is a collective one. When communities work together to improve health resources, advocate for better systems, and support those in need, we move closer to a world where everyone has the opportunity to live a healthy life.

But change does not always require sweeping global initiatives. Sometimes it begins with simple acts within our own neighborhoods.

Check in on an elderly neighbor who may be isolated.
Bring a healthy meal to a friend recovering from surgery.
Support a local health clinic or nonprofit that serves vulnerable families.
Encourage children to play outside and stay active.
Take a walk with a friend instead of meeting over coffee.

These small actions ripple outward in ways we may never fully see.

Health is also deeply connected to kindness and connection. Loneliness and isolation are now recognized as serious public health concerns. When we reach out to others, build community, and foster meaningful relationships, we strengthen not only emotional well-being but physical health as well.

In other words, caring for each other is a form of healthcare.

The past few years have reminded the world just how interconnected our health truly is. A virus that began in one corner of the world quickly affected every community on the planet. We learned that protecting one another through science, cooperation, and compassion was essential to protecting ourselves.

Global health begins locally.

When we make choices that strengthen our own well-being getting enough sleep, moving our bodies, nourishing ourselves with healthy food, managing stress, and nurturing relationships…..we are contributing to a healthier society. When communities prioritize parks, clean air, safe neighborhoods, and accessible healthcare, they build the foundation for future generations to thrive.

And when we look after the most vulnerable among us, we honor the idea that everyone deserves the opportunity to live a healthy life.

This World Health Day, perhaps the best thing we can do is pause and ask a simple question:

What is one small step I can take today to care for my health and the health of my community?

Maybe it is scheduling that doctor’s appointment you’ve been putting off.
Or choosing to move your body and enjoy the outdoors.
Maybe it is checking in on someone who may need encouragement or support.

Health is not built in a single day. It is built through daily choices, shared responsibility, and the understanding that we are all connected.

When we take care of ourselves, we strengthen our families.
And when we strengthen our families, we build healthier communities.
When communities thrive, the world becomes a healthier place for us all.

Because in the end, a healthier world begins with each of us. 🌎

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Cancer

Episode 99: Looking back

It is incredible believe that we are on the precipice of 100 episodes of this podcast! Truly remarkable.  I mentioned at the beginning of the year Mel Robbins saying that we can not know where we are going unless we know where we have been. So this moment, before we step off into a new season seemed like that moment to reflect on so many incredible life lessons learned from 99 incredible guests!

Since 2020, the world has changed in ways none of us could have imagined. We’ve all lived through loss, fear, isolation, and uncertainty. And yet, during these years, something extraordinary happened here at Charity Matters … we kept meeting heroes.

Not superheroes.
Not people with perfect answers.

But ordinary humans who faced life’s hardest moments and chose love anyway.

Episode 99 is a pause. A breath. A moment to look back at the people who showed us what courage, compassion, community, and faith really look like. These are the stories that didn’t just inspire us….they changed us.

I’m so glad you’re here.

 Loss, Love, and Legacy 

“Some of the most powerful Charity Matters conversations begin with the unimaginable……the loss of a child.”

Episode 94: Kate Doerge  Penny’s Flight

Kate Doerge lost her daughter Penny to Neurofibromatosis. And yet, what stays with me most from that conversation was not just grief it was joy. Kate taught us that joy and sorrow are not opposites. They coexist.

Through Penny’s Flight, Kate searches for a cure for NF while keeping Penny’s spirit alive. She reminded us that love does not end when life does and choosing joy is not denial, it is bravery.

Lesson: Joy can be an act of defiance in the face of grief.

Episode 92: Rob Thorsen  Shoulder Check

Rob Thorsen lost his son to mental health struggles and instead of letting silence continue, he broke it. Shoulder Check is built on one life-saving idea: checking in.

Rob showed us that mental health conversations are not optional. Asking “Are you okay?” can be an act of love and sometimes, an act that saves a life.

Lesson: Love becomes legacy when it leads to action.

Episode 84:  Mary Fagnano Thrive N Joy

After a tragic surfing accident changed their son Nick’s life forever, his parents chose purpose. Thrive N Joy became a youth leadership organization rooted in resilience, character, and hope.

The Fagnano family reminded us that tragedy does not have to be the end of the story, it can become the mission.

Lesson: Resilience can be modeled, taught, and shared.

Episode 64: Ian Sandler Riley’s Way

When a father lost his nine-year-old daughter Riley at sleepaway camp, he created a movement of kind leaders in her name. Riley’s Way is about empathy, courage, and leading with heart.

Riley’s short life left a long legacy.

Lesson: Kindness is never small and leadership begins with compassion.

“None of these parents chose this path. But all of them chose what came next.”

Homelessness, Dignity, and Healing 

“Homelessness is not just about housing….it’s about dignity and being seen.”

Episode 90: Terry Grahl  Enchanted Makeovers

Terry Grahl knows homelessness and trauma personally. Through Enchanted Makeovers, she transforms shelters for women and children into spaces of beauty and calm.

These rooms say: You matter.

Terry taught us that dignity is not a luxury, it is the foundation of healing.

Lesson: Beauty can be a form of justice.

Episode 36: Kevin Adler  Miracle Messages

Kevin Adler showed us that connection can be the bridge back to life. Miracle Messages reconnects people experiencing homelessness with loved ones they’ve lost touch with….sometimes for decades.

Homelessness often begins with broken relationships. Healing begins with being remembered.

Lesson: Community heals what isolation breaks.

Community: How We Rise Together

“If there is one truth that echoes through nearly every Charity Matters episode, it is this: we are not meant to do life alone.”

Episode 71: Debbie Bial  The Posse Foundation

Debbie Bial believed that talent is everywhere, but opportunity is not. By sending students to college together in “posses,” she created belonging and tens of thousands of college graduates.

Lesson: Belonging is a catalyst for success.

Episode 69: Rachel Doyle Glamour Gals

Teenagers doing nails with seniors might sound simple but it dissolves loneliness on both sides. GlamourGals reminded us that community doesn’t have to be complicated to be powerful.

Lesson: Small connections create big change.

Episode 46: Maggie Kane  A Place at the Table

Maggie Kane’s pay-what-you-can café invites everyone to the same table…..housed or unhoused. No labels. Just dignity.

Lesson: When we eat together, we humanize one another.

Faith: The Quiet Foundation 

“So many of these heroes didn’t set out to build nonprofits. They set out to live their faith.”

Episode 9: Brian Mavis America’s Kids Belong

Brian Mavis and his wife’s faith compelled  them to act for foster children turning belief into belonging for tens of thousands of kids.

Lesson: Faith becomes powerful when it moves us beyond ourselves.

Episode 24: Hal Hargrave  Be Perfect Foundation

After becoming a paraplegic, Hal Hargrave chose to see his setback as a calling. His faith helped him transform pain into purpose.

Lesson: Faith doesn’t remove obstacles—it gives them meaning.

 

Episode 58: Kurt Handler  410 Bridge

Kurt Kandler showed us faith in action through partnership, not handouts. Empowering communities to lift themselves up.

Lesson: True service creates possibility, not dependence.

“When I look back at all of these heroes, one thing is clear….none of them did this alone, and none of them did this without love.”

Episode 99 is not just a look back. It’s an invitation to belong, to believe, and to act.

Revisit these stories on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and www.charity-matters.com. Share the ones that moved you. And remember:

Every time you choose kindness, compassion, or service….you become part of this story too.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2026 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

 

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Heart Disease

February is all about heart

January gets all the attention. New calendars. Fresh planners. Big resolutions written in bold ink. We step into the New Year fueled by hope, energy, and the belief that this will be the year everything changes.

And then February arrives quietly.

The decorations come down, the confetti is swept away, and real life settles back in. The gym crowds thin. The lists get tucked into drawers. And yet, this is exactly when the real work begins.

February is Heart Month. And not just in the medical or nonprofit sense, though that matters deeply. February is the month that invites us to pause, look inward, and ask a far more important question than What do I want to do this year?

It asks: Who do I want to be?

February is the month of love. Valentine’s Day reminds us of romance, connection, and affection but the deepest kind of love is not always wrapped in red paper and ribbon. Sometimes love looks like honesty. Often it looks like courage. More than that love looks like choosing to change patterns that no longer serve us.

This is the month to take stock.

By now, we have enough distance from January to tell the truth. Which goals still feel aligned? What goals were fueled by pressure instead of purpose? Which dreams are whispering instead of shouting and refuse to go away?

February doesn’t demand grand gestures. It invites quiet commitment.

In the nonprofit world, February is also Heart Month, a reminder of why so many of us do this work in the first place. We don’t show up to change the world because it’s easy. We show up because something in our heart tells us we must. Because injustice, suffering, or loss has touched us personally. Because love compels action.

And that’s the connection February offers us all.

Real change for good rarely happens in loud moments. It happens in the quiet spaces where intention turns into action. Where reflection turns into resolve. Where love becomes something we do, not just something we feel.

February is not about starting over. It’s about recommitting.

It’s about asking:

  • What habits am I willing to protect?

  • Are there boundaries  I need to strengthen?

  • Where have I been rushing past what really matters?

This is the month to check your heart…..not just your pulse, but your purpose.

Are you living in alignment with what you believe matters most?
Do your days reflecting your values?
Are you loving others and yourself in ways that are sustainable?

Winter still surrounds us in February. The pace is slower. The evenings are quieter. Nature itself seems to be resting and preparing. There is wisdom in that.

We don’t always need to do more.
Sometimes we need to become more intentional about how we do what we do.

February gives us permission to stop chasing shiny resolutions and instead nurture lasting change. Small, steady, heart-centered steps. The kind that don’t burn out by March but grow roots that last all year.

In a world that glorifies urgency and noise, February reminds us that transformation often begins softly…ireflection, in love and in choice.

This is the month to lean into compassion.
To forgive yourself for what didn’t stick in January.
Time to celebrate what did.
Then adjust, not abandon your goals.

Because love is patient.
Change is incremental.
And the heart knows the way forward if we’re willing to listen.

So as February unfolds, I invite you to treat it as a gift. A pause. A checkpoint. A heart check.

Let this be the month you choose intention over intensity.
Connection over perfection.
Purpose over pressure.

Because when change is led by the heart, it doesn’t fade with the seasons.

It becomes who we are.

And that is how we truly change for good.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Cancer

World Cancer Day: February 4th

The words, “You have cancer,” change everything.

They change the rhythm of a heartbeat, the meaning of time, the way a family breathes together. Those words change plans and priorities, conversations and calendars. According to data from 2022, more than 20 million people around the world hear those three words each year, and over 53 million people are alive within five years of a diagnosis, still living with and navigating the disease.

There isn’t one person reading this who hasn’t been touched by cancer. A parent, a sibling, a spouse, a friend, a colleague and a neighbor. Cancer is indiscriminate and relentless, and yet, so are the people who rise to meet it with courage, grit, and hope.

Right now, I have three dear friends all young, vibrant, and full of life who are actively fighting this insidious disease. Watching someone you love endure cancer is its own kind of heartbreak. You want to fix it, take the pain away and most of all to do something. When the truth is that so much of it is out of your control. And yet, this is where love lives, in the something we can do.

Next week, on Wednesday, February 4th, the world will pause to recognize World Cancer Day. I’m sharing this early this year with one simple hope: that we use this moment not just to raise awareness, but to take action. Because kindness, support, and connection matter more than we sometimes realize especially to someone walking through cancer.

The Silent Weight of Cancer

Cancer is not just a medical diagnosis. It is emotional. Financial. Spiritual. It brings exhaustion that sleep doesn’t cure and fear that no amount of reassurance fully erases. Cancer affects the patient, yes but also their families, caregivers, and communities.

There are days filled with scans and waiting rooms. Days of good news and days of devastating setbacks and days when the bravest thing someone can do is simply get out of bed. And while survivors often speak of strength, what I have learned again and again is this: strength doesn’t mean doing it alone. Support matters. Being seen matters. Feeling remembered matters.

What Not to Say and What to Do Instead

Many of us want to help, but we’re afraid of saying the wrong thing. So we say nothing. Or we offer vague promises: “Let me know if you need anything.” Here’s the truth: people with cancer are tired. Tired of explaining, tired of asking and tired of being strong.

Instead of waiting, show up with intention:

  • Drop off a meal (or better yet, a grocery or restaurant gift card).

  • Send a simple text: “Thinking of you today.”

  • Offer specifics: “I can drive you to treatment Tuesday” or “I’ll take the kids Saturday.”

  • Sit quietly. Listen. Let them talk or not talk at all.

Sometimes the greatest gift is presence without pressure.

Small Acts That Make a Big Difference

As we approach World Cancer Day, here are tangible ways each of us can support those living with cancer:

1. Support Cancer-Focused Organizations
There are incredible nonprofits providing research funding, patient services, advocacy, and community. A donation large or small that all helps fuel hope. All of these resources below are linked.

2. Give Time, Not Just Money
Volunteer at a hospital. Help with transportation. Babysit. Walk a dog. Cancer steals energy and your time gives it back.

3. Send Comfort, Not Just Cards
Soft socks. Cozy blankets. Journals. A playlist. Small comforts can bring enormous relief during long treatment days.

4. Educate Yourself
Understanding the disease your loved one is facing allows you to be more compassionate and present. Knowledge builds empathy.

5. Honor Caregivers
Caregivers are often the quiet warriors. Check on them. Feed them. Encourage them to rest. They need support too.

The Power of Community

One of the greatest lessons cancer teaches us, if we’re paying attention, is the power of community. No one is meant to walk this road alone. When we show up for one another, we lighten the load in ways medicine alone cannot. I’ve seen how a meal train becomes a lifeline. How a text at the right moment becomes strength. How a prayer, a note, a simple “I’m here” becomes hope.

And hope matters.

Why World Cancer Day Matters

World Cancer Day isn’t just a date on the calendar. It’s a reminder that cancer is a global fight and a deeply personal one. World Cancer Day is a call to compassion, to advocacy and a call to action. On February 4th, wear a ribbon. Share a story. Make a donation. Reach out to someone who is fighting. Do something….anything that says, “You are not alone.”

Because love doesn’t cure cancer but it carries people through it.

A Final Thought

To those fighting cancer: you are seen, you are loved. and you are more than this diagnosis. For those who have lost someone: your grief matters, and your love lives on. And to those who want to help but don’t know how: start small. Start now. Start with love.

This World Cancer Day, let us turn awareness into action, compassion into community, and kindness into healing. Because when we care for one another, truly care, we change the world, one act of love at a time.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Charity Matters Inspiration

Episode 94: Penny’s Flight

Some stories meet you in the deepest places and still lift you higher. This week, you’ll meet Kate Doerge….wife, mother, builder of community……who turned the unthinkable loss of her daughter, Penny, into a living legacy called Penny’s Flight. What began in a cocoon of love and butterflies has become a national movement of students, families, and friends spreading wings for those living with neurofibromatosis. Kate’s pillars; finding beauty in imperfection, choosing positivity in the face of challenge, and having faith over fear…..these aren’t just slogans; they’re the way she gets up, puts both feet on the floor, and keeps going. You can feel Penny’s light in every word.

Frankie Doerge, Chad Doerge, Kate Doerge, Henry Doerge

If you’ve ever wondered how purpose is born from pain, or how one brave family can transform grief into hope for thousands, this episode is for you. Kate’s story is tender and electric, grounded and soaring….all at once. It will remind you that we always have a choice in how we play the cards we’re dealt, and that a single flutter can change the weather for someone else. Come listen, be moved, and like Penny……leave with a bigger wingspan.

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Penny’s Flight does?

Kate Doerge: Penny’s Flight exists to keep our daughter Penny’s big, beautiful light alive and to change the future for families living with neurofibromatosis (NF). NF is actually the most common genetic condition in the U.S., but it’s also one of the most underfunded. Roughly 1 in 2,500 people are affected, about 150,000 Americans, yet most people have never heard of it. Penny was diagnosed at four months old, and even then we refused to let a diagnosis define her. She lived joyfully for sixteen radiant years.

When Penny passed on November 11th, 2022, our community wrapped us in so much love that my husband and I knew we had to channel that energy into purpose. Within four weeks, we launched Penny’s Flight. Since then, wings have truly spread: we’ve raised close to $6 million, started more than a hundred student-led chapters at high schools and colleges, and rallied teams and towns around “Play for Penny” lacrosse games, “Pucks for Penny” hockey nights, bake sales…..whatever brings people together to shine a light. Our three pillars guide everything: finding beauty in imperfection, choosing positivity in the face of challenge, and having faith over fear. And our mantra, “It’s your wingspan, not your lifespan” is Penny’s message to the world.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing up? Did you have any role models that inspired you in this work?

Kate Doerge: My role models were my parents from day one. My mom was a dancer and an absolute beam of light….belly dancing, tap, jazzercise……you name it. She taught me how physical strength fuels mental strength and how movement lifts you out of darkness. My dad was a devout Catholic, a former Marine who once studied for the priesthood. From him I learned faith, service, and the belief that there’s something bigger than all of us.

Our home life wasn’t cookie-cutter. My mom might pick me up in leg warmers while other moms wore turtlenecks. We traveled to Haiti and the Dominican Republic in the 1980s, long before “service trips” were common….so I saw early what it meant to help beyond your comfort zone. That shaped me. In my career in PR and fashion, I was always asking, “Where can I make a real impact?” Those seeds of service were planted well before Penny’s diagnosis, and they sprouted the moment we needed them.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Penny’s Flight?

Kate Doerge: I always return to my father’s advice the night before our wedding: “You will be challenged. It is up to you how you play the cards you’re dealt.” When Penny’s brain tumor, glioblastoma…..accelerated in her last two years, we chose to celebrate her life loudly. During her final week, instead of closing the doors, we opened the windows and invited everyone in. We created what I call a “love cocoon.” There were butterflies everywhere….her sign to us.

After we celebrated her life, my husband and I looked at each other and knew: we have to do something. My background is launching brands; his is finance. Our community was saying, “How can we help?” Four weeks after November 11th, we launched Penny’s Flight. It felt like Penny was our partner in it…..like she was saying, “Keep going.” Even on the day she passed, we took a family walk, got back in the car, turned the ignition, and “Walking on Sunshine”…her song blared from the radio though it hadn’t been on before. That was our first sign: move forward, one step at a time.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Kate Doerge: Grief and logistics don’t take turns. I had two sons, a husband, a home, a community of Penny’s sixteen-year-old friends who had never lost someone, and extended family…..all hurting. I felt a responsibility to lead with light, to model a path that others could follow. Practically, the challenges are familiar to every founder: building infrastructure while building momentum; sustaining funding; making noise in a noisy world. Add to that the complexity of medical research siloed efforts, niche subfields, and the realities of federal funding. Last year, NF’s federal allocation was cut; we went to Capitol Hill and advocated to restore it. It’s back on the bill for review, but advocacy never stops.

And yet the hardest challenge….turning pain into purpose….has also been our greatest teacher. Every day we choose the light. Every day we choose action.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Kate Doerge: Energy can’t be created or destroyed….it transforms. I feel Penny’s energy, and my parents’ too. I feel it in the butterflies, in the serendipities, in the way doors open at the exact moment you need them to. I also feel powered by the next generation. Students reach out constantly: “Can we host a game? A bake sale? Start a chapter?” Watching young people use social media for good….that’s rocket fuel.

Our community fuels me. Media friends like Norah O’Donnell shared our story on CBS within a week of launch, and Oprah Daily invited me to write about “playing the cards you’re dealt.” Brand partners like Veronica Beard, J.McLaughlin, Roller Rabbit asked, “What can we do?” Their platforms amplify NF awareness in ways research labs alone can’t. That collaboration…science, students, storytellers, brands….keeps me going.

Charity Matters: When do you know you have made a difference?

Kate Doerge:Impact shows up as a human story. A mom DM’d us: her four-year-old was just diagnosed with NF; she’d gone down a dark Google rabbit hole. That same day, she opened her mailbox to a J.McLaughlin invite for a Penny’s Flight event and found a different rabbit hole….hope. Months later, she organized a Blackstone Gives Back team, pitched Penny’s Flight, and won $125,000 for NF research. That’s a life changed turning into lives changed.

Another young woman with NF wrote when Roller Rabbit launched their butterfly pajamas for us. She said, “I never thought my favorite brand would support the condition I’ve lived with. I finally feel seen.” That sentence…I feel seen…that is impact.

And then there’s community: our first Penny’s Flight Family Jamboree drew 650 people….blankets on the lawn, kids running, live music on a summer night because Penny loved birthdays. We didn’t just raise funds; we raised each other.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Kate Doerge: In two and a half years, we’ve raised close to $6 million, launched 100+ student chapters nationwide, and activated schools and teams through “Play for Penny” and “Pucks for Penny.” We’ve become a marketing engine for NF, partnering with Children’s Tumor Foundation to complement their strong scientific backbone with our storytelling and awareness. We brought leaders together at Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory’s Banbury meeting, a lock-in think tank of global experts because progress accelerates when silos come down.

On the research side, we’re funding work that’s already showing promise. For a disease as heterogeneous as NF, that means convening optic glioma experts next to cognitive researchers, next to tumor biologists, next to data scientists and pushing for shared insights rather than parallel tracks. When we measure impact, we count dollars and chapters and media reach, yes. But we also count new collaborations formed, young advocates trained, and families who no longer feel alone.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Kate Doerge: It’s not a dream….I feel it in my bones: we will find a cure for NF. That conviction is why I pour the same determination I once poured into giving Penny the fullest life into this mission. The roadmap is clear: sustained funding, coordinated research, relentless awareness, and a movement of people who believe that wings scattered from a thousand small actions can change the weather.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Kate Doerge: First, we always have a choice in how we play the cards we’re dealt. That wisdom from my dad has become a daily practice. Choose to move literally. Put your feet on the floor. One step. Then the next. Small, actionable steps carry you through the mud of grief.

Second, look for the signs. They’re real. Butterflies on the window in November. A radio that wasn’t on suddenly playing “Walking on Sunshine.” When you keep your eyes open, you realize our loved ones are with us differently, but powerfully.

Third, collaboration is oxygen. In research, in advocacy, in community building, the magic happens when we invite everyone to the table….scientists, students, brands, media, families. We each bring a wing to the flight.

Fourth, service multiplies. The “butterfly effect” is not just a metaphor….it’s a strategy. A student chapter post turns into a game night turns into a grant turns into a lab experiment turns into a breakthrough. Tiny flutters, big weather.

Finally, positivity is not denial; it’s discipline. Choosing beauty in imperfection and faith over fear doesn’t erase pain. It transforms it into purpose.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Kate Doerge: Three years ago, I couldn’t have imagined this life….writing a book, speaking about reimagining grief, launching workshops to help others navigate adversity and midlife reinvention, stewarding a national movement in Penny’s name. I used to search for the “one client” that would let me move the needle; now I see that the needle is people, and the work is love organized.

I am more certain, more grounded, and oddly, more joyful. I feel accompanied by Penny, by my parents, by a community that believes in light. I’ve learned that grief and gratitude can share a sentence. I’ve learned that teenagers can be fierce world-changers. I’ve learned that when you open your doors in the hardest week of your life, you teach an entire community how to love without fear.

Most of all, I’ve learned that it’s our wingspan…how far we’re willing to reach for others…that measures a life.Penny taught me that. Now it’s my job to help the world learn it too.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Profile

Episode 87: Raregivers Global

You’ve heard me say it time and time again—the universe constantly places incredible people in my path. Sometimes I think my brain has a special filter that helps me find the very best humans on this planet. A few months ago, I was speaking to a National Charity League group and selling books when this bright light of a woman approached to buy a few. We started talking, and of course—she’s a nonprofit founder! But she is so much more than that. Her story is as amazing as she is.

I am truly excited for you to meet Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin and hear her incredible journey of service with her nonprofit, RareGivers Global—a worldwide network that provides emotional support to caregivers of those with rare, chronic, and complex diseases. Did you know that 350 million people worldwide live with a rare disease? That’s 1 in 15 families globally who are navigating these caregiving challenges. Cristol’s story is ultimately a love story—for her brothers, whom she lost to a rare disease—and how she now uses her life to help countless others.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Raregiver Global does?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: Raregivers cares for the caregivers. We are all about providing emotional relief services to caregivers that are living in what we call a radical caregiving environment. We work specifically with patients, parents and  healthcare professionals in rare, chronic and complex diseases. There’s about 10,000 uncured rare diseases that have been genetically identified, and it’s not a small community. It’s the wrong word… rare. The rare disease community is actually one in 10 families in the United States, and one in 15 worldwide.

This is really radical caregiving. This is 24/7 medical management at home. This is doing skilled nursing interventions like administering epileptic medications every hour on the hour, 24/7 for decades.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing Up…Did you have any indicators that maybe you would go into this type of work?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  My parents met when they were 15—he was the football captain, she was the cheerleader. They married at 19 and told their pediatrician they wanted a big family. Within eight years, they had five children. What my mother didn’t know was that she was a carrier for Hunter Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder affecting boys.

My oldest brother didn’t have it, but my younger brothers David, Jared, and Randy did. My mom noticed early delays in their development. Eventually, they received the diagnosis: Hunter Syndrome. There’s no cure. Our family went through every phase of grief, holding on to hope.

I was 10 when Randy passed at 12. My other brothers passed at 18 and 19. I was 10, 14, and 15 when they died. Not long after, my parents divorced. Later, I learned that divorce rates are six times higher in rare disease families. Depression, anxiety, and addiction rates are also staggeringly high among caregivers.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Raregivers Global?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  You even mentioned in your book, Change for Good, the impact of mortality events.  I think there is a moment in your life where you realize you’re mortal.  You think, I may not be on the planet as long as I thought I was going to be. This is not a dress rehearsal and we only have one life to make our mark.  I always wanted to be in an environment where I can give back and to have some sort of meaningful element to the work I’m doing.  That moment for me was far after my brothers had passed.

As I started thinking about starting a family.  I was genetically tested and actually found out that I was a carrier. And based on that, my dad and I go to the national MPs (Hunter’s Syndrome) family conference. We walk in the door and we look around and there are all these young men that look like my brothers. It just gave me chills.

I came home and said to my girlfriends, “There’s a part of my history that I’ve never really shared with you.  And I want to do something.” We started a fundraising organization called Angel Aid.  Angel is a moniker, A, N, G, E, L which stands for A Nonprofit Group Enriching Lives.

It took awhile but we raised $50,000 and in 2002 we received a matching research grant  which went on to become an FDA approved treatment. The research doctor had this very elegant idea that if the kids are missing the enzyme, they need to create a synthetic version of that enzyme, and we’ll flush it through their body like dialysis, Enzyme Therapy. We went through FDA approval that funded research. Then  we went through clinical trial, and now young men that would have passed away in their teens are going off to college.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  The challenge is that missions morph. Angel Aid was the precursor to Rare Givers.  And here’s the challenge. There’s no cures for any of these diseases.  Community is not a cure, it’s a treatment.  I mentioned 10,000 rare diseases, one in 10, one in 15. Worldwide, that’s  350 million families and there’s only treatments for 5% of that community. So the challenge is the other 95% have no options, none.  They’re going through the same cycles that my family went through holding hope and grief in the same heart every single day.

In 2016, I went in and I got a routine mammogram. I came out with a breast cancer diagnosis.  I was like, Oh no, well, there’s another shift in mortality.  Now I have a 10 year old. I’m married. What hit my heart was, what am I waiting for?  I thought my community was the MP/Hunter’s Syndrome community. Then I realized, my community is this much broader community. I was waking up every single night, thinking these families with rare diseases must all be in emotional crisis. There’s no cures. That community needs emotional support like I received with breast cancer support.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My mother inspires me because, as I mentioned, my parents divorced, and my mother went on a very deep, dark journey with alcohol,  gambling, with any really kind of escape mechanism to deal with the pain and grief.

We can’t imagine the choices that my family’s had to make. Somewhere along the way, her faith pulled her through, and she got sober. She came back to me. My mom showed up for my daughter and my family in a way that was really profound. She actually reconnected with my father and did a lot of really healing conversations. So what fuels me is very personal, but it’s also, an example of what can happen in rare disease families. This is the joy to the grief.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: We’ve identified 287 pieces of published research on the emotional toll of rare disease caregiving. From this, we developed an emotional journey map outlining six stages families go through—from noticing changes in a loved one to diagnosis, caregiving, and end-of-life care.

We started with seven women in a living room in 2019. Today, we’ve reached 77,000 families. Our guidebook—thanks to Microsoft—has been translated into 12 languages. With AI tools, they’re working on 400 more. Our goal? Reach 3.5 million rare givers by 2026. What do we need now? Funding. But we have momentum on our side.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  I dream big. My dream is very clear and specific. I want Dolly Parton to write a song about RareGivers. Then Melinda Gates will hear it, fund a $10 million endowment, and Oprah will spread the word to hospitals worldwide. Colin Farrell, whose son has a rare disease, will join in. Chris Hemsworth will visit rare disease families in Australia. Eva Longoria will thank us at a L’Oréal event. John Mayer will bring a Hunter Syndrome patient onstage. And Julia Roberts will direct and star in an Amazon series to educate the world. That’s my dream.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: When I was younger, I used to think that I was creating change in the world and I would just muscle it out and use my intellect, my network, connections, skills and just manifest change. During COVID, it was just a global pandemic, that humbles you in a way that  you just can’t deny.  We had to relaunch Rare Givers.  I started realizing that I can’t muscle through this.

I was looking at my mother, she’s a very strong woman of faith, and I really had not cultivated that side of my heart and my soul.  The word surrender just kept coming up again and again.  It brings me to tears, because as soon as I surrendered the outcome, then it just became an exercise in faith. I will tell you that the miracles just start coming, and then you start living in gratitude, hopping from miracle to miracle and that exact right person arrives.

Charity Matters: You mentioned there was a happy ending to your familY’s story, can you share it with us?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My parents married young and lost three of their five children. They divorced, remarried, divorced again, and married new partners for 20 years. Both were widowed in the same year our daughter Chloe was born.

Chloe’s arrival reopened their hearts. After 35 years apart, they began dating again. And last year, at 81 years old, we remarried them—60 years after their original wedding. That’s our happy ending.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

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Charity Matters Inspiration

Episode 86: William’s Be Yourself Challenge

Easter has passed and we are officially into springtime, the season of renewal. There is no greater renewal story than today’s guest Susan Shaw. Susie and her husband lost their nine year old son William in an accident. In the years that followed they have taken that pain and turned into purpose for other grieving families.

Join us today for a powerful conversation about love, loss and renewal. Susie’s journey is one of inspiration and hope that there is always love.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what WBYC does?

Susie Shaw: At WBYC, we empower individuals to embrace their authentic selves with courage and joy. We are dedicated to fostering meaningful connections within our community and supporting grieving families by providing the tools they need to honor their loved ones and navigate their journeys of healing. Together, we create spaces where love, remembrance, and personal growth flourish.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start WBYC?

Susie Shaw: We started the organization shortly after my son William died. He died in 2019, when we were on a family ski trip out in Montana.  William was nine. There was an accident and, as you can imagine, it was one of the most painful and excruciating events that I’ve ever experienced. The beauty that came from my community after he died, was incredible. I live in a very small town, where everybody knows everybody.

 When William died, he was in third grade and the whole town suffered with us.  As time went on, we started  to notice and hear that some of William’s friends and parents were still struggling in their grief.  A year after William had died, my husband and my surviving son, Kai, were getting support. We were going to the grief groups because there are services for people like us there. There aren’t any services for best friends.

If you’re the friend of a little boy who dies, there’s no support group for that right? I was so close with all of these families that I just hated what I was seeing for them.  So a group of moms got together with my permission, and they decided to put on our very first event playing a game William loved. When we saw the excitement and the beauty and the love that all these kids felt for each other while honoring William and they had that agency over their feelings. Williams Be Yourself Challenge spawned out of that inaugural event. We went on to host an educational lecture and brought in a therapist to talk about grieving for the community. 

 I also realized how privileged my family has been in our grief journey and the support that we have received through therapy and our beautiful community. My husband got to take six months off of work. That is not the norm.  We had this unbelievable privilege of him taking those six months and we got to travel as a new family of three to figure out. We were able to create some new memories. All this stuff that happened in the early months after William died was percolating in me. A while after, I thought,” I wish other families could have this. I wish other families could go away, because sometimes home is hard. The bedroom is there, the toys are there.” There’s all these reminders. 

We’re currently raising money to be able to buy a single family home for families who have suffered the loss of either a child or a parent. We want to be able to give 52 families per year a free week-long vacation. I realized that getting away was so incredibly important for our family. Now all I want to do is allow other families to have just a week. Isn’t long enough, but it’s something.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Susie Shaw:  I am an entrepreneur. And that was something I had never done before.  This isn’t me. My first job out of college, I was in the nonprofit space.  I worked for the United Cerebral Palsy of Chicago. I was their events planner, and it was an amazing job. Then I worked at the Museum of Modern Art in New York in their development office and at the LA County Museum of Art. So, I had this past of service and understanding of the world of philanthropy and giving.

Some of my challenges have been being the starter. Before, when I was in nonprofit, I was the worker.  Now I’m telling people what to do. I’m walking that line of not trying not to control too much, but needing help finding the right help. Now we need expertise in real estate and in planned giving.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Susie Shaw: I just think about the families that I want to serve because I know what it feels like to need that support, you know. I’ve walked their path. And I certainly don’t want to insinuate that I know what every grieving family feels like, because every grieving family has their own unique story. However, I do think that some of the things we want to do for these families are universal. You want to be cared for. You want to be seen in your grief. You want to be witnessed in your grief, and know that somebody is looking out for you who understands.

And so that’s what I think about when, when I get off a call with a potential donor who just doesn’t get it or isn’t interested in the project.. It happens. You’re not going to relate to everybody.  Then I go back to the families because I’ve been there and I know how painful it is.

 I just want to be able to give other families that same little bit of hope to know that they’re going to be able to survive. I was so afraid that my family would disintegrate after William died. Instead, we had a ton of support, a ton of guidance and we’re doing wonderfully.  We brought a new child into our life. We have a four year old, Cody and he is just the best thing that we could have done for our family. 

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Susie Shaw: it’s hard to quantify, because what we’re trying to do is such an emotional experience. We don’t have a program where we’re hiring therapists to execute with immeasurable results. However, I do think about success in getting feedback from a family who spends a week at our house and telling me that it was transformative, that it was healing and that it was important. I also think about those families than telling their friends about it, and maybe those friends then donate to us. That, to me, is a measure of success. Or those guests that come to our house and tell their grief support groups about their experience and create a referral system. That’s a measure of success. The fact that people are recognizing that this is a needed service within the grief space is success as well.  

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Susie Shaw: if we had a network of grief retreat homes for families.  That would be beyond my wildest dream. Then we could serve double and triple and quadruple the amount of families. With one house, we can serve 52 families a year, if we were to have people there all year. 

Judy’s house is a grief support group out of Denver and they partner with New York Life Foundation.  Both are responsible for sort of quantifying data around bereaved families. Their newest report has just come out. They have found that one in 11 children will suffer the loss of a sibling or a parent before they turn 18. Wow. That is so many families!  52 families to me, sounds like an amazing feat, but that’s barely scratching the surface of how many families need grief support.  If we can have more, let’s have more!

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Susie Shaw:  I’m grateful for every moment.  There’s no rush in any of this. Let’s just be really intentional about what we decide to do today or this week or this month, and that’s really helped me slow down in everything.  I just feel like I’m a better human being.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Susie Shaw: When William died, my entire life changed 100%.  I am a mother and I have two living children as well.  I identify as a bereaved mother. Sometimes first, because it has changed me so much more than even becoming a mother. Losing a child has changed me more than giving birth to three children.

I think I’m a better person. I really do. And I talk a lot with other bereaved moms. There’s a similar sentiment among many of us. I mean, we were just cracked open.  Everything just came pouring out….The good, the bad, all of it and I guess I just feel like I’ve grown so much in my empathy and for all types of people. Especially with my little four year old, I am so much more patient because I view motherhood in a new way…… that we all just need to slow down.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Causes

Episode 85: The KinderSmile Foundation

Did you know that students miss 53 million hours of school each year due to oral disease? I did not but thanks to our amazing guest today I have learned so much about what our underserved communities around the country are facing with a lack of proper dental care. I am so excited to introduce you to the amazing Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes. A full time dentist, a mother and a nonprofit founder on a mission to change all of that with the KinderSmile Foundation.

Join us for an incredible conversation that will inspire you in unbelievable ways. If you don’t think one person can change the world then you haven’t met Dr. Nicole!  Dr. Nicole is pure sunshine in a bottle and will definitely give you something to smile about!

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what The KinderSmile Foundation does?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes: KinderSmile Foundation is a 501, c3, non profit organization whose mission is to increase oral care access and oral care education for low income children and Perinatal mothers and their families. And our vision hopes to eradicate the number one preventable disease, which is oral disease, and that every child has a chance to see a dentist.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing up? Did you have any philanthropic role models?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes: Growing up, I can identify multiple role models. My mother, of course, was one. She was an immigrant from Jamaica, West Indies. My mother worked very hard, and she poured into us giving back, giving back, giving back in her own way.  I noticed as a young child, I always had an affinity to serve and to give back. Either I was taking some young children to the park or babysitting or helping the elderly. It was always part of my fabric and my soul. And so I think that’s where that philanthropic part of me started as a very, very young child. 

When I completed dental school 1991 I was this black, successful dentist in northern New Jersey, Montclair, New Jersey, I checked off all the boxes you have, your home, your children, so forth and so on. But my whole soul was still craving or yearning for something. I had a hole in my soul despite checking off all the boxes. And then you realize that there’s a difference between providing a service, like what you do in dentistry or serving your community. What I was missing was serving my community. 

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start The KinderSmile Foundation?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes: That moment was in 2007 when I decided to open up my private practice to children at a local Head Start in Montclair, New Jersey.  I asked the Executive Director of that program to please bus children to my office. I wanted to treat them for free as long as they have the consent from their parents. One evening I received a phone call from my receptionist. She said, ” Dr Nicole. There is a five year old little girl here in the office now. They need help. They need an emergency exam.”

 And so I leave my children, I go to the office. There was this little five year old black girl,  we’ll call her Z,  and she leaped into my arms. She literally had an abscess the size of a golf ball. And when I saw that, my heart stopped after leaving my children, because my son was almost that age.  I knew that it could potentially be deadly. So I spoke to the grandmother, and I said, “Look, this is serious. We gotta get on some antibiotics. Do you have any insurance? ” And she said, ” Well, we live in Union County, we live 30 minutes away. We could not find a dentist in a 35 mile radius to treat her because we have state Medicaid.”

So that night, I went home, and I could not sleep. I fell to my knees, and I had a long conversation with God.  I literally said,” if this is my purpose, confirm it. The next morning, I was reading the ADA quarterly news, about a 12 year old,  black boy from Prince George’s County, Maryland, who died from that same toothache, infection that little Z had. He was 12 years old. His mother was burying her first child because no one wanted to treat him because he had Medicaid. All it would take was two minutes of writing a prescription. 

It was at that was that moment, November 2007 that I started KinderSmile Foundation. I knew nothing about a nonprofit, absolutlely nothing.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes: Some of the early challenges were juggling a family, a private practice all while starting a nonprofit.  Some of the challenges as a woman entrepreneur you’re balancing family life because you’re driven by your passion. You’re driven by the fact that there’s a problem and I can solve it, or I can contribute to the resolution of this issue.

 Then  trying to get other people in my profession to understand why I’m doing this and the necessity. That was very difficult, because public health dentistry is not necessarily viewed as a successful entity of the dental profession. And if you don’t know that 53 million hours in school are missed every year due to oral disease, you don’t know that. I had to educate my colleagues, not to get offended, but to educate them. So the education took at least seven to 10 years. Now we have a list of volunteer dentists who are willing to participate, who are willing to open up their doors and to treat our children and our patients. So it’s worth it. The persistence paid off.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes:  I tend to look at it qualitatively. Education to me is the key. And for me, success is if I can educate a child, one family at a time, the extractions, the fillings, the dental services,  that is the icing on the cake. But if you can really meet them where they are, to edify and encourage them that you know what? Your child doesn’t need to have a cavity. This is the way you go about it. That’s what makes me sleep at night.

Yes, the grants that you receive, or the $16 million worth of in kind services, or the 8000 patients we see annually, yes, those numbers are impactful. But the lives that you save through compassion, educating, and letting them know that I Care Dental Homes that we built, not dental clinics, which has a negative connotation, but the Dental Homes that are beautifully decorated and clean and organized. When they walk in, they say, “This is for me,. whether I have dental insurance or not.” That is success. They know they can always come back to a KinderSmile community for quality, comprehensive treatment. That to me is success.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes:  The big dream would be the expansion of our KinderSmile dental homes and our KinderSmile community oral health centers. I would like to see that in other areas in the country. A dental home that opens the door to the underinsured. Replicate our model and have it in other indigent areas because we know the model works. We know the mission and the vision is so impactful.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes:  I learned that first of all the word obedience blares out right when you’re called to do something trust and have that faith. But I also learned  that persistence wins and humility connects God. Persistency wins and humility connects because when you’re humble, you realize it’s not about you. When I’m speaking to my colleagues, and you’re humble, regardless of what they’re thinking, your humility is going to connect.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes:  This has been a wonderful journey. A wonderful, wonderful journey. One thing, I could definitely say is that I get less offended. I think in the early years, when colleagues would say insensitive things like, “What’s it in for me?”  or “I don’t treat those.” I would take it just a tad bit personally. When you step back and you realize that it’s bigger than you, but most importantly, it’s not about you.  Then you get less offended. Then you say, let me use this platform to educate my colleagues, to educate people, regardless of your socioeconomic status or your color or your race or your religion. This is my purpose. This is my journey. So let me educate because you don’t know what you don’t know.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Dr. Nicole McGrath Barnes:  To be very honest, what fueled me was my faith and that I was brought here for a reason. This is my purpose. And when you know that, you know that. You know this is a purpose, there’s no such thing as giving up.  You understand that there will be dark times and there will be light times, but you still persist, because it’s bigger than me. It’s serving a community and it’s creating a legacy.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2025 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

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