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Halfway through 2025

June is just around the corner, which means we’re somehow halfway through the year. I’m not quite sure how that happened, but it definitely snuck up on me. Like many of us, I kicked off the year with a laundry list of goals. I love making lists, so trust me when I say that I set out to accomplish a lot. My philosophy is simple: if I don’t at least put it out there, it will never happen. And even if I only achieve half, I’m still moving the ball of life forward in some positive direction… or at least that’s what I tell myself.

Now, I’ll admit there are more than a few goals that haven’t seen the light of day. My commitment to return to yoga once a week? Not even close. I haven’t so much as stretched. Total fail. Sunday meal prep? Another great idea that has yet to materialize. And then there’s the long list of home improvement projects… still untouched. Let’s just say there’s definitely room for growth and improvement. But hey, that’s what Q3 and Q4 are for, right?

Looking back, though, there have been some solid wins. The book has been doing extremely well and it is such a joy to see that dream growing. My husband and I set a goal for quarterly adventures, and we’ve actually stuck to it! We’re on track to keep exploring and adventuring through the rest of the year, and that feels really good. I’ve made progress on the goal to scroll less and read more. I’m absolutely reading more…though if I’m honest, I’m not sure the scrolling has slowed down. So we’ll call that a partial win. What I am proud of is my commitment to being more present, being a better friend, and being a verb instead of a noun. This has been a year of action, and those are definitely strides worth celebrating at this mid-year checkpoint.

Of all the goals, the one I’m most proud of is the one my sister and I made together: spending more intentional time with our dad. We promised monthly “dates with Dad,” and it’s been one of the most meaningful accomplishments of the year. Sure, spending time with our dad is always good, but actually planning fun outings and experiences has created beautiful memories—and quality time that we all cherish. It was meant to be a gift for him, but in truth, we’re the ones who’ve received the greatest gift. We’ve road-tripped to Arizona to see family, explored museums, gone boating with his siblings, and we have more adventures ahead. Time with those you love really is the ultimate gift.

As I look ahead to the rest of the year, I know there’s still a lot I want to accomplish. Starting June 1st, I’m diving into a new workout and nutrition plan so that should help check off a few of the lingering health goals. Who knows, maybe I’ll even get around to meal prepping. A girl can dream, right? We’re all works in progress, and that means celebrating what we have done while still setting our sights on what we can do. Six months is still plenty of time to make meaningful progress. As far as I’m concerned, it’s never too late to start. As the Carroll shelby quote says in the photo above,”Persistence is the most important thing in life.”

So here’s to June….a fresh start, a second half, and a second chance to get it right… or at least move that ball one step farther down the field…persistently.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2025 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Episode 88: A Brighter Day

I am so excited to introduce you today to an amazing man, Elliot Kallen. He is a passionate entrepreneur, nonprofit founder, and father who has transformed personal tragedy into a mission of hope. As the CEO of multiple companies and the founder of A Brighter Day, Elliot brings both business acumen and deep empathy to his work. After losing his 19-year-old son, Jake, to suicide, Elliot committed himself to supporting teens struggling with depression and anxietywith his nonprofit,  A Brighter Day.

Today his organization touches thousands of families each month. Grounded in the life lessons passed down from his Holocaust-survivor mother, Elliot lives with a deep sense of purpose—driven not by profit, but by impact. His story is one of resilience, love, and an unwavering belief in the power of helping others.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what A Brighter Day does?

Elliot Kallen: What we do is we create resources for teens and their families on stress and depression with the goal of stopping teen suicide.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing up and your family?

Elliot Kallen: I’m the CEO of three companies right now. I grew up in a very middle-class home in New Jersey. My parents were community-minded and active members of our local synagogue. We gave money, even though my dad never made more than forty thousand dollars a year, and my mom was your typical 1960s–70s stay-at-home mom. Still, we gave back.

My mom often spoke about her father, who was a librarian in Vienna and probably made five dollars a week during the Great Depression. Every week, he would empty the change from his pockets, and that’s what he would donate. We were always taught to give back. Most of the time, that meant giving to family or helping cousins around the world.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start A Brighter Day?

Elliot Kallen:  It’s a heartbreaking story, and sadly, it doesn’t have a happy ending. Eleven years ago, my 19-year-old son, Jake—a sophomore at the University of Montana—took his life in the early hours of a Friday morning. No drugs, no alcohol. He walked onto the highway and stepped in front of a truck.

We were frantically searching for him all day because his phone was off—something no teenager ever does. At 6:30 that evening, FedEx delivered a six-page suicide note. That’s how we found out he was gone. His note was filled with the typical ramblings of a teen in crisis, but one paragraph stood out. He wrote, “Mom and Dad, I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. I never would have told you how I felt. I never would have asked for your help. And I never would have taken your help.”

It was as if he was trying to let us off the hook—but how could we ever be?

His mother and I flew to Spokane the next morning, then drove to Missoula to claim his body, which had been left unclaimed at a funeral home. On the flight home, his body in the cargo hold beneath us, I kept rereading that paragraph. I turned to his mother and said, “We have to do something to prevent this devastation from happening to other families.” She replied, “I can’t do it. You’re on your own.” And so, I began the journey to create a nonprofit.

At first, the idea was to use music—bring in adult cover bands and host events for teens with mental health resources. But when we met with local musicians, they gave me critical advice: “This has to be for teens—by teens. No adult bands, no adults in the room. Teens won’t open up if they feel watched. And the resources have to be teen-friendly. Most mental health tools are built for adults, and they miss the mark.”

We decided to focus on depression, anxiety, and suicide prevention—issues teens face every day. A recent survey showed that nearly 50% of teens have felt anxious or depressed in the past year, and many have had suicidal thoughts.

I often describe it like this: imagine a six-sided box—four walls, a top, and a bottom. For teens, it’s rarely all blue sky. Life can feel like constant turmoil. And when all six sides of the box feel black—when it’s all pain and no light—some teens begin to believe, “Yesterday was awful. Tomorrow will be worse. No one will miss me anyway.”

That moment—that hopelessness—is where suicide lives. That’s what we’re trying to stop.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Elliot Kallen: I don’t want to downplay how cathartic it’s been to start a nonprofit and to share Jake’s story—especially in that first year. Every time I told it, I could barely hold back tears. What surprised me was how many people shared their own stories in return—about their uncle, aunt, parent, sibling. We cried together. I kept tissues nearby and handed them out often. If you cried in my office, chances are I was crying too.

Sometimes, I still go to the cemetery. Nothing changes—the view, the conversation—but it grounds me. I stand on Jake’s grave to read the plaque, and I talk to him. I talk to God. I don’t want to imagine Jake’s face in the clouds like a movie ending. But I do hope he’s listening.

I’ve built and sold businesses, so I understand the lifecycle—products, services, cash flow, lawsuits, people problems. A nonprofit is different. You still have people issues—because people are people—but the bigger challenge is constantly telling the story in a way that touches hearts. That’s not hard for me. The hard part is finding the right audience to tell it to. Filling rooms, building an online following, gaining traction—that’s the uphill battle.

And here’s the truth: every nonprofit is regional—until it either goes national or goes out of business. I’ve served on national boards like the Boys and Girls Clubs and the American Cancer Society. They were national before I joined. My nonprofit, A Brighter Day, has resources used in all 50 states, but when it comes to fundraising, we’re still very local. Regional nonprofits live hand-to-mouth. That means I need to lead, write checks, and carry the mission forward every day.

But I don’t want to die and take the nonprofit with me. I’m working hard to build sustainability so I can eventually step back from being the de facto leader and just serve as a board member. We talk constantly about that next step—about building longevity and putting a structure in place so A Brighter Day has legs without me.

I believe there should always be a Kallen on the board—because it began with us—but they don’t have to lead. They just need to show up once a year, wherever they live, to remind others why we exist. This began with Jake, but it doesn’t have to end with me. That’s the goal.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Elliot Kallen: I’ve been very blessed in my life. Even after losing my son to suicide, I still consider myself incredibly fortunate. I grew up in a small, middle-class home, but I was always deeply loved. My father was part of the Greatest Generation and my mother survived Auschwitz. They had both seen unthinkable tragedy and loss.

Their voices still guide me—what I call the “schizophrenic voices” on my shoulders, not devil and angel, but Mom and Dad. My father’s message was always, “You can never make up for hard work,” and he instilled that in his three children—we all became workaholics. My mother’s voice says, “You can do better today than you did yesterday, and better tomorrow than today.”

That mindset stays with me. I still come to work each day with energy and excitement, whether it’s in my for-profit ventures or in the nonprofit space. In business, I’m always asking how we can grow, improve, and learn from our missteps—because mistakes are just painful learning moments. In the nonprofit world, the question is: how do we serve more people, more effectively, without burning through resources?

Every organization, for-profit or nonprofit, has a financial burn rate. If you ignore that, one day you wake up and can’t make payroll. That’s the reality. Whether or not you call it capitalism, we’re all accountable to the numbers—even in service work.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Elliot Kallen:  Right now, through A Brighter Day and all our online resources at abrighterday.info, we’re reaching thousands. One of our biggest tools is a teen-focused texting crisis line that gets 50 to 150 new teens every month. They receive a response within five minutes—because teens love to text—and almost every single one asks the same heartbreaking question: “Am I the only one feeling this way?” They’re incredibly isolated.

We also know that if your teen came to you and said, “Mom, I’m cutting” or “I’m thinking about hurting myself,” you’d do everything you could to get them help. But in most places it can take 6 to 10 weeks to get a live appointment with a licensed therapist. We can connect teens with a licensed therapist via Zoom in all 50 states within seven days. And while virtual counseling isn’t quite the same as being in the room, it’s still meaningful support—and we cover the cost for 90 days.

Right now, we’re reaching between 3,000 and 6,000 families every single month.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Elliot Kallen: If there’s one word that defines our goal, it’s impact. We want to make a meaningful difference in people’s lives, and that only happens if our message truly reaches them.

People ask me, “Where do you see yourself in 20 years?” My honest answer: I hope I’m still alive—but not still running the charity. That would mean I failed to build something sustainable. What I really hope is that, at my funeral, someone stands up and says, “He made a major impact on everyone he touched.” That’s the legacy I’m striving for.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Elliot Kallen: The biggest lesson? Life is incredibly short. My mother used to say, “Life goes by in the blink of an eye,” and I never understood it until I got older—but she was right.

You can’t take life for granted. You have to show up every day with the right attitude, because attitude really iseverything. If you keep putting in the effort with heart and intention, good things follow.

What truly matters is the people around you, the lives you touch, the impact you make. It’s not just about who’s impacted you—it’s about how many lives you can reach and make better. If you focus on that, you’re doing something truly great.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2025 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Episode 87: Raregivers Global

You’ve heard me say it time and time again—the universe constantly places incredible people in my path. Sometimes I think my brain has a special filter that helps me find the very best humans on this planet. A few months ago, I was speaking to a National Charity League group and selling books when this bright light of a woman approached to buy a few. We started talking, and of course—she’s a nonprofit founder! But she is so much more than that. Her story is as amazing as she is.

I am truly excited for you to meet Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin and hear her incredible journey of service with her nonprofit, RareGivers Global—a worldwide network that provides emotional support to caregivers of those with rare, chronic, and complex diseases. Did you know that 350 million people worldwide live with a rare disease? That’s 1 in 15 families globally who are navigating these caregiving challenges. Cristol’s story is ultimately a love story—for her brothers, whom she lost to a rare disease—and how she now uses her life to help countless others.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Raregiver Global does?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: Raregivers cares for the caregivers. We are all about providing emotional relief services to caregivers that are living in what we call a radical caregiving environment. We work specifically with patients, parents and  healthcare professionals in rare, chronic and complex diseases. There’s about 10,000 uncured rare diseases that have been genetically identified, and it’s not a small community. It’s the wrong word… rare. The rare disease community is actually one in 10 families in the United States, and one in 15 worldwide.

This is really radical caregiving. This is 24/7 medical management at home. This is doing skilled nursing interventions like administering epileptic medications every hour on the hour, 24/7 for decades.

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about Growing Up…Did you have any indicators that maybe you would go into this type of work?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  My parents met when they were 15—he was the football captain, she was the cheerleader. They married at 19 and told their pediatrician they wanted a big family. Within eight years, they had five children. What my mother didn’t know was that she was a carrier for Hunter Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder affecting boys.

My oldest brother didn’t have it, but my younger brothers David, Jared, and Randy did. My mom noticed early delays in their development. Eventually, they received the diagnosis: Hunter Syndrome. There’s no cure. Our family went through every phase of grief, holding on to hope.

I was 10 when Randy passed at 12. My other brothers passed at 18 and 19. I was 10, 14, and 15 when they died. Not long after, my parents divorced. Later, I learned that divorce rates are six times higher in rare disease families. Depression, anxiety, and addiction rates are also staggeringly high among caregivers.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Raregivers Global?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  You even mentioned in your book, Change for Good, the impact of mortality events.  I think there is a moment in your life where you realize you’re mortal.  You think, I may not be on the planet as long as I thought I was going to be. This is not a dress rehearsal and we only have one life to make our mark.  I always wanted to be in an environment where I can give back and to have some sort of meaningful element to the work I’m doing.  That moment for me was far after my brothers had passed.

As I started thinking about starting a family.  I was genetically tested and actually found out that I was a carrier. And based on that, my dad and I go to the national MPs (Hunter’s Syndrome) family conference. We walk in the door and we look around and there are all these young men that look like my brothers. It just gave me chills.

I came home and said to my girlfriends, “There’s a part of my history that I’ve never really shared with you.  And I want to do something.” We started a fundraising organization called Angel Aid.  Angel is a moniker, A, N, G, E, L which stands for A Nonprofit Group Enriching Lives.

It took awhile but we raised $50,000 and in 2002 we received a matching research grant  which went on to become an FDA approved treatment. The research doctor had this very elegant idea that if the kids are missing the enzyme, they need to create a synthetic version of that enzyme, and we’ll flush it through their body like dialysis, Enzyme Therapy. We went through FDA approval that funded research. Then  we went through clinical trial, and now young men that would have passed away in their teens are going off to college.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  The challenge is that missions morph. Angel Aid was the precursor to Rare Givers.  And here’s the challenge. There’s no cures for any of these diseases.  Community is not a cure, it’s a treatment.  I mentioned 10,000 rare diseases, one in 10, one in 15. Worldwide, that’s  350 million families and there’s only treatments for 5% of that community. So the challenge is the other 95% have no options, none.  They’re going through the same cycles that my family went through holding hope and grief in the same heart every single day.

In 2016, I went in and I got a routine mammogram. I came out with a breast cancer diagnosis.  I was like, Oh no, well, there’s another shift in mortality.  Now I have a 10 year old. I’m married. What hit my heart was, what am I waiting for?  I thought my community was the MP/Hunter’s Syndrome community. Then I realized, my community is this much broader community. I was waking up every single night, thinking these families with rare diseases must all be in emotional crisis. There’s no cures. That community needs emotional support like I received with breast cancer support.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My mother inspires me because, as I mentioned, my parents divorced, and my mother went on a very deep, dark journey with alcohol,  gambling, with any really kind of escape mechanism to deal with the pain and grief.

We can’t imagine the choices that my family’s had to make. Somewhere along the way, her faith pulled her through, and she got sober. She came back to me. My mom showed up for my daughter and my family in a way that was really profound. She actually reconnected with my father and did a lot of really healing conversations. So what fuels me is very personal, but it’s also, an example of what can happen in rare disease families. This is the joy to the grief.

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: We’ve identified 287 pieces of published research on the emotional toll of rare disease caregiving. From this, we developed an emotional journey map outlining six stages families go through—from noticing changes in a loved one to diagnosis, caregiving, and end-of-life care.

We started with seven women in a living room in 2019. Today, we’ve reached 77,000 families. Our guidebook—thanks to Microsoft—has been translated into 12 languages. With AI tools, they’re working on 400 more. Our goal? Reach 3.5 million rare givers by 2026. What do we need now? Funding. But we have momentum on our side.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin:  I dream big. My dream is very clear and specific. I want Dolly Parton to write a song about RareGivers. Then Melinda Gates will hear it, fund a $10 million endowment, and Oprah will spread the word to hospitals worldwide. Colin Farrell, whose son has a rare disease, will join in. Chris Hemsworth will visit rare disease families in Australia. Eva Longoria will thank us at a L’Oréal event. John Mayer will bring a Hunter Syndrome patient onstage. And Julia Roberts will direct and star in an Amazon series to educate the world. That’s my dream.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: When I was younger, I used to think that I was creating change in the world and I would just muscle it out and use my intellect, my network, connections, skills and just manifest change. During COVID, it was just a global pandemic, that humbles you in a way that  you just can’t deny.  We had to relaunch Rare Givers.  I started realizing that I can’t muscle through this.

I was looking at my mother, she’s a very strong woman of faith, and I really had not cultivated that side of my heart and my soul.  The word surrender just kept coming up again and again.  It brings me to tears, because as soon as I surrendered the outcome, then it just became an exercise in faith. I will tell you that the miracles just start coming, and then you start living in gratitude, hopping from miracle to miracle and that exact right person arrives.

Charity Matters: You mentioned there was a happy ending to your familY’s story, can you share it with us?

Cristol Barrett O’Loughlin: My parents married young and lost three of their five children. They divorced, remarried, divorced again, and married new partners for 20 years. Both were widowed in the same year our daughter Chloe was born.

Chloe’s arrival reopened their hearts. After 35 years apart, they began dating again. And last year, at 81 years old, we remarried them—60 years after their original wedding. That’s our happy ending.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2025 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Refueling

Before Easter I was hanging by a thread. Thank you to all who reached out with wonderful support and kind comments, your emails and thoughts mean more than you know. Truth be told I was simply out of gas. The past few months of running a nonprofit has taken its toll. I don’t usually pause but push through. This time there simply wasn’t enough in the reserve tank to do so. I had no choice but to stop, to wait and to refuel for as long as it took to recharge these very empty batteries.

Easter was so much fun! Our middle son is engaged and his beautiful fiance and her family joined ours for the first time. That was fuel for my tank. A houseful of love and family and laughter. Pure sunshine and joy that reminded me how blessed we are. Then there was actual Spring Break. No, I didn’t leave my desk but since schools were closed the phones didn’t ring and it felt like a retreat of sorts. No in person meetings and a week to dig out was restorative.

Then this past weekend, we celebrated the happy couple’s engagement with bringing so many family and friends together to celebrate these two beautiful people starting their life together. It poured rain all day until an hour before the party. Then the sun came out and it was a glorious day on so many levels. People came from far and wide and the love in the room was palpable. That is the fuel that makes me go, love. It is the best energy source available here on earth and one that is renewable if properly tended.

Then I came home to receive this note from Susie Shaw, who you met last week with her podcast William’s Be Yourself Challenge. Susie said, “I’m truly touched to have the opportunity to share William’s story and the mission behind WBYC with your audience. It was a privilege to connect with you, and I’m so grateful for the thoughtful, heartfelt way you approach your work. I’m excited to share the episode and blog post with our community.  Thank you again for the opportunity and for all that you do to shine a light on service, hope, and impact. It truly means so much.” 

This is why I do this work. Not for the accolades but to know that these conversations matter. Susie went on to share that her community had a devastating loss last week with three teens killed in a car accident. She was able to begin working with grieving families that had helped her in her enormous time of loss. To give back to those that held her up. Hearing about moments like these lifts me up. It refuels my faith in humanity and gives me hope.

To end a full week, on Sunday and Tuesday I spoke to two different groups about Change for Good. It was terrific to hear from people who had read the book and hear how it had inspired them . It was lovely knowing that people who read the book were now buying it for friends and family to inspire them to serve. Hearing from people who had found renewal in serving others also refueled me. Knowing that the message of service as the ultimate silver bullet is resonating with people brings me such joy.

While my tank is more than halfway filled, I am renewed by love, by kindness and by the compassion of others. It is the best way to keep moving forward.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2025 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Episode 86: William’s Be Yourself Challenge

Easter has passed and we are officially into springtime, the season of renewal. There is no greater renewal story than today’s guest Susan Shaw. Susie and her husband lost their nine year old son William in an accident. In the years that followed they have taken that pain and turned into purpose for other grieving families.

Join us today for a powerful conversation about love, loss and renewal. Susie’s journey is one of inspiration and hope that there is always love.

 

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what WBYC does?

Susie Shaw: At WBYC, we empower individuals to embrace their authentic selves with courage and joy. We are dedicated to fostering meaningful connections within our community and supporting grieving families by providing the tools they need to honor their loved ones and navigate their journeys of healing. Together, we create spaces where love, remembrance, and personal growth flourish.

Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start WBYC?

Susie Shaw: We started the organization shortly after my son William died. He died in 2019, when we were on a family ski trip out in Montana.  William was nine. There was an accident and, as you can imagine, it was one of the most painful and excruciating events that I’ve ever experienced. The beauty that came from my community after he died, was incredible. I live in a very small town, where everybody knows everybody.

 When William died, he was in third grade and the whole town suffered with us.  As time went on, we started  to notice and hear that some of William’s friends and parents were still struggling in their grief.  A year after William had died, my husband and my surviving son, Kai, were getting support. We were going to the grief groups because there are services for people like us there. There aren’t any services for best friends.

If you’re the friend of a little boy who dies, there’s no support group for that right? I was so close with all of these families that I just hated what I was seeing for them.  So a group of moms got together with my permission, and they decided to put on our very first event playing a game William loved. When we saw the excitement and the beauty and the love that all these kids felt for each other while honoring William and they had that agency over their feelings. Williams Be Yourself Challenge spawned out of that inaugural event. We went on to host an educational lecture and brought in a therapist to talk about grieving for the community. 

 I also realized how privileged my family has been in our grief journey and the support that we have received through therapy and our beautiful community. My husband got to take six months off of work. That is not the norm.  We had this unbelievable privilege of him taking those six months and we got to travel as a new family of three to figure out. We were able to create some new memories. All this stuff that happened in the early months after William died was percolating in me. A while after, I thought,” I wish other families could have this. I wish other families could go away, because sometimes home is hard. The bedroom is there, the toys are there.” There’s all these reminders. 

We’re currently raising money to be able to buy a single family home for families who have suffered the loss of either a child or a parent. We want to be able to give 52 families per year a free week-long vacation. I realized that getting away was so incredibly important for our family. Now all I want to do is allow other families to have just a week. Isn’t long enough, but it’s something.

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Susie Shaw:  I am an entrepreneur. And that was something I had never done before.  This isn’t me. My first job out of college, I was in the nonprofit space.  I worked for the United Cerebral Palsy of Chicago. I was their events planner, and it was an amazing job. Then I worked at the Museum of Modern Art in New York in their development office and at the LA County Museum of Art. So, I had this past of service and understanding of the world of philanthropy and giving.

Some of my challenges have been being the starter. Before, when I was in nonprofit, I was the worker.  Now I’m telling people what to do. I’m walking that line of not trying not to control too much, but needing help finding the right help. Now we need expertise in real estate and in planned giving.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Susie Shaw: I just think about the families that I want to serve because I know what it feels like to need that support, you know. I’ve walked their path. And I certainly don’t want to insinuate that I know what every grieving family feels like, because every grieving family has their own unique story. However, I do think that some of the things we want to do for these families are universal. You want to be cared for. You want to be seen in your grief. You want to be witnessed in your grief, and know that somebody is looking out for you who understands.

And so that’s what I think about when, when I get off a call with a potential donor who just doesn’t get it or isn’t interested in the project.. It happens. You’re not going to relate to everybody.  Then I go back to the families because I’ve been there and I know how painful it is.

 I just want to be able to give other families that same little bit of hope to know that they’re going to be able to survive. I was so afraid that my family would disintegrate after William died. Instead, we had a ton of support, a ton of guidance and we’re doing wonderfully.  We brought a new child into our life. We have a four year old, Cody and he is just the best thing that we could have done for our family. 

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Susie Shaw: it’s hard to quantify, because what we’re trying to do is such an emotional experience. We don’t have a program where we’re hiring therapists to execute with immeasurable results. However, I do think about success in getting feedback from a family who spends a week at our house and telling me that it was transformative, that it was healing and that it was important. I also think about those families than telling their friends about it, and maybe those friends then donate to us. That, to me, is a measure of success. Or those guests that come to our house and tell their grief support groups about their experience and create a referral system. That’s a measure of success. The fact that people are recognizing that this is a needed service within the grief space is success as well.  

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Susie Shaw: if we had a network of grief retreat homes for families.  That would be beyond my wildest dream. Then we could serve double and triple and quadruple the amount of families. With one house, we can serve 52 families a year, if we were to have people there all year. 

Judy’s house is a grief support group out of Denver and they partner with New York Life Foundation.  Both are responsible for sort of quantifying data around bereaved families. Their newest report has just come out. They have found that one in 11 children will suffer the loss of a sibling or a parent before they turn 18. Wow. That is so many families!  52 families to me, sounds like an amazing feat, but that’s barely scratching the surface of how many families need grief support.  If we can have more, let’s have more!

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Susie Shaw:  I’m grateful for every moment.  There’s no rush in any of this. Let’s just be really intentional about what we decide to do today or this week or this month, and that’s really helped me slow down in everything.  I just feel like I’m a better human being.

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Susie Shaw: When William died, my entire life changed 100%.  I am a mother and I have two living children as well.  I identify as a bereaved mother. Sometimes first, because it has changed me so much more than even becoming a mother. Losing a child has changed me more than giving birth to three children.

I think I’m a better person. I really do. And I talk a lot with other bereaved moms. There’s a similar sentiment among many of us. I mean, we were just cracked open.  Everything just came pouring out….The good, the bad, all of it and I guess I just feel like I’ve grown so much in my empathy and for all types of people. Especially with my little four year old, I am so much more patient because I view motherhood in a new way…… that we all just need to slow down.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Spring break without breaking

Do you ever feel like you are going at such a fast pace that you can’t sustain it? That is how the world has felt these past few months. The pace is just too much. Things are coming at me faster than I can manage. I am one of those people who loves a full plate. Even this is too much to digest. Everything is telling me to slow down and to take a breath and yet I am still running.

Don’t get me wrong, there are so many great things are happening. Charity Matters Podcast was listed in the top three Charity Podcast by Feedspot. Thanks to all of you. So that was amazing! Voyage Magazine did a terrific feature on some of the work I do and that was really lovely and unexpected as well. Even all of the great attention the book and message are getting didn’t seem to  refuel my tank.

Last week, I was in San Francisco for a terrific talk about Change for Good. While I was up there, I visited with one of my old work colleagues who I fondly called my work husband for thirteen years. He looked at me and said, “Boss, you need to take care of yourself.” I told him, that actually I needed to take care of the nonprofit first and there will be time to take care of me later. Again, he said, “Boss, you really need to slow down and take care of yourself.”

His message surprised me a bit. Although, I heard him I wasn’t entirely grasping his concern. This week is Easter week and for many means spring break and down time. For me,  it is the exact opposite. At work I have a big board meeting and am in the process of hiring more people for desperatly needed support. I do know that once those two huge moments are in the rearview mirror, I will take a breath. Ok, maybe a short one because hosting Easter is next up.

As I sat down to pull together this week’s podcast and interview, a process that usually takes three to four hours, I realized that my gas tank was empty. If anything was going to break this spring it was me. I heard my co-worker’s words as I stared at my computer screen and at the glorious day outside. So with those few hours I was supposed to be working on the podcast, I did something I hadn’t done in months. I grabbed my garden sheers and went into my yard.

The result was a big smile, dirty hands a garden bed that looks fantastic. Oh and this week’s podcast episode is being pushed back a week. Thank you in advance for your understanding. It was pretty remarkable of what a few hours alone playing in the dirt can do to renew you. I know it isn’t quite enough but they say the first part about solving a problem is recognizing you have one. So, at least there is that.

Spring is the season of renewal and we all need to find what renews us from time to time. We need to choose to take care of ourselves. It is the only way that we will be able to keep caring for others. I wish you all a joyous Spring break and a glorious Easter filled with much renewal.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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The healing power of helping

I wrote this piece a couple of weeks ago and waited to share it here because it was picked up by a few places and published, which was really lovely. Now that it is “out” I wanted to share it with you….

We lost everything in the fire.” She pulled out her phone and showed me the charred remains of what was once her beautiful home in Altadena. The loss, the sadness and shock were real but where Marie said this was almost as shocking as the tragic images of what was left of her home. Marie was volunteering and helping other victims of the fires in our Pasadena/Altadena community and she wasn’t the only one.

When tragedy strikes, it is easy to think about what has happened to us? Who is it that thinks about others while they are suffering? After interviewing hundreds of fellow nonprofit founders over the past decade, I have learned that many know the path to healing begins by helping others. All of these individuals have suffered a loss of some sort and recycled their pain for purpose.

As we were folding clothing at our tables at the Pasadena Elks Lodge to distribute items to families who had lost everything in the fire, my fellow volunteer Denise told me, “I would much rather be here helping others than thinking about what has happened in my neighborhood.” Teary eyed and sad, she went on to tell me that she has always volunteered and that is how she met so many of the people in her community. Years spent helping in the classroom, with sports teams and so many groups that make Altadena a special place to live. While those places may be gone, the community spirit that created this idyllic neighborhood is not. We are seeing this day after day as the community begins to dig out from the rubble of their lives and start the healing process.

According to the US. Census Bureau and Americorp, over 75.7 million or 28.3% of the US population age 16 and up formally volunteered in 2023. That is more than one out of four Americans. Those hours add up to over 5 billion hours of formal volunteering, that is an average of 66 hours per person or eight business days. Meanwhile, over half of Americans age 16 and older say that they provided informal help to their neighbors.

Living in the Pasadena community my entire life, I have seen this community come together time and time again to help one another in times of loss. When I lost my own mother in a tragic car accident two decades ago, our community rallied around us in ways we could never begin to repay. Neighbors paid my parents bills while my father was in a coma. Meals came for six weeks while we attended three funerals from the accident. Friends mailed our Christmas cards and bought diapers for our young children and the list goes on. This what this community has always done and continues to do in the face of tragedy. Like the beautiful San Gabriel Mountains which were formed over centuries of earthquakes, this community will rise from the rubble as it continues to give and learn to receive.

It was  in receiving that I learned the power of giving to heal. A year after our family’s tragedy, a group of friends and I started a nonprofit at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles to provide chaplains of all faiths to CHLA. It was serving that community that healed my own loss and grief in unimaginable ways. The power to see an other’s pain somehow deflects your own. It is through serving others we gain empathy and perspective that puts us on the long path to healing.

Dr. Ervin Staub Ph.D wrote in his December 2011 article in Psychology Today entitled, The Altruism of Suffering that, “Healing, by talking about one’s suffering to  empathic others, contributes. Support from individuals and community, society embracing those who have suffered, is of great value. After some of these experiences, people may be ready to begin to help others, learning by doing that further changing them.”

When I asked my girlfriend Stephanie if I could start a Go Fund Me for her after she and her family lost everything in the Altadena fire. She asked me if instead I would consider starting a fundraiser for the Los Angeles Regional Food Bank, where she is a board member. My reply was, “You don’t own a toothbrush!” In the end, we did both. Each of us recognizing each other’s needs to help.  Stephanie recognized that her friends needed an outlet to heal  by supporting their Go Fund Me. While for Stephanie, supporting her beloved LA Regional Food Bank  is a way for her to begin the healing process while helping others.

As one friend told me, “Things don’t always end up how you hope or plan that they will.  We are discovering the most amazing support from our community and everyone around us. I am reminded daily of the love that surrounds me during one of the most difficult times in my life.”

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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The power of love

2025 has already been a year of ups and downs. Moments of extreme joy and sadness. It reminds me of the opening line from The Tale of Two Cities,” It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” Sadness all around and yet such willingness to help, so much goodness and kindness. It is all a little much some days.

This past week felt more like it was the best of times. The week started off with being a guest on Jay Frost’s DonorPerfect Philanthropy Masterminds Podcast where we discussed the power we have to make a difference. If you want to listen you can catch it here.

Then I was asked to speak to three different groups about Change for Good and the healing power of service and the power of love. The National Charity League in Orange County was amazing and it was wonderful to share the importance of inspiring and modeling giving to our teenagers. These women are doing incredible work and it was such a thrill to see the power of community in action. Anything is possible when we all come together to help one another. We are seeing this over and over, especially in Pasadena. It renews me and my belief that people are truly good.

At USC and the Catholic Fellowship League I spoke about the power of love or the real definition of charity, love of mankind. It was after all, Valentine’s Day last week. I thought I would share a little of my words here because love isn’t just about one day a year. It is something we should give away everyday.

I know that change always begins with loss, when you listen to God you find grace, your gifts and gratitude and that if you want a life of purpose it is one of faith and service.

When our one short precious life comes to an end, is anyone going to talk about your weight or your bank account at your funeral? No! They are going to talk about how you made people feel, who you helped, how you lived and how you made the world better through your kindness and love.

 I am not a perfect example of this but the hundreds of nonprofit founders who I have interviewed are. Their stories and lives are in this book and their examples of how to live and give. This is what we should all be focusing on because this is what really matters. There is no silver bullet for life. If there was a silver bullet it would be helping another person. It is the one and only thing we can all do to affect change for good.

So today, I leave you with this challenge: 

Find one way—just one—to lead with love. Maybe it’s writing a note of encouragement. Maybe it’s volunteering for a cause that speaks to your heart. Maybe it’s simply telling someone, I see you. I appreciate you. You matter.

Because love is the greatest force for good that exists. It is the foundation of every act of kindness, every movement for change, every moment of transformation.

And the best part? It’s already within you. So let’s go out and use it. Let’s change the world—not with grand speeches or big plans—but with love, one small act of kindness at a time.

Life is precious, life is short. Use it well and use your one beautiful life to change someone else’s. It is the best thing you can ever do to Change for Good.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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Putting What Matters First

We are a month past New Years, which feels like a million years ago, right?  For us here in LA, 2025 didn’t start out as planned. The fires that ravaged the Palisades and my hometown of Pasadena are still devastating to everyone. Oftentimes, it takes a tragedy to be reminded of what really matters. I can tell you as we evacuated we looked around after grabbing our photos, papers and dog and realized nothing else really mattered.  What I do think, regardless if you evacuated or not, is that you take a serious assessment of what really matters to you.

For us, this recent tragedy put life more in focus of what we care about. As a result, my husband and I tried a different approach with the things we hope to achieve and how we want to live this year. We spent time together discussing what is important to us and what we want to do this year together. Because of that conversation, we broke our year down into quarters and decided that we would go on one mini adventure per quarter. Then we reached out to a few friends and asked if they wanted to join us and we began to create a plan.

The goal was to fill up our jar or in this case calendar with golf balls. Have you ever seen the famous video where the professor fills a jar with golf balls?  He describes these four golf balls as the most important things in your life. For most of us those golf balls are family, health, friends and community. Next the professor puts pebbles in the jar with all of life’s have too’s the birthday parties, the work obligations, you get the idea. Then comes sand followed by water. His point is that most of us don’t start with what matters first.

This year we are starting with fun, family time and prioritizing  those memories first. I am determined to make more real connections. The old fashioned in person type. So much of our days are spent on zoom or phone calls but not in person and it can be lonely. Creating moments where we can be with the ones we  love also gives us something to look forward to.

Connections come in many ways and one of the best ways to create connection is to serve, volunteer or help someone. Last year the Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy, called loneliness a public health crisis.  A recent study from the American Psychiatric Association found that 30% of adults say that they have feelings of loneliness at least once a week and 10% saying that they are lonely everyday. The poll’s definition of loneliness was “feeling like you do not have meaningful or close relationships or a sense of belonging.”

One easy cure is to help others and get involved. When we volunteer we are not on our phones looking at someone else’s life, we are living our own. Whether we are helping a student learn to read, helping families dealing with their loss or volunteering at our local food pantry, you are reaping all the benefits of service, most especially a sense of purpose. When we help others we lose site of our problems, we make connections and it reaffirms our impact in the world.

Since February is the month of love, it seems like a perfect time to create more connections, community and joy. Think about what matters to you, who you can help and start putting those golf balls in the jar first. The rest of life will fill itself in. Remember it is never too late to change your life for good or someone else’s life.

 

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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The Distribution of Love

This past week regardless of where we live we watched some of the most devastating fires sweep across LA and my home town of Pasadena and the surrounding communities. We were evacuated from the fires along with tens of thousands of people. We are the lucky ones because we are safe and our home is fine. Thank you to everyone who reached out. It was scary and surreal. Living in a canyon, fire is no stranger, but this was other worldly.  At least 10 of our friends and counting have literally lost everything with thousands and thousands more impacted. We are all in shock, devastated, depressed and the sadness hangs like the smoke.  The carnage is truly unimaginable.

The loss of every possession you own is beyond devastating but it is the loss of place that is worse. The place where your child took their first step. The place where you celebrated  birthday parties and back yard barbecues. The place where you lay your head at night is your place in this world. Your home is the place where your life existed and now there is no place. In Altadena and in the Palisades, not only are the homes gone but so are the churches, the schools, the markets and all of the places that create a community. All of it is rubble. Where is their place? It is the one thing our friends really need and the one thing we can not provide, their place. It is simply too much to comprehend.

What just happened was a death. The most unimaginable loss and as in most deaths, everyone you have ever known shows up in the first two weeks. There is more food, calls, and text than you can process. It is overwhelming the outpouring of love you receive when someone dies is overload. This is what is happening to all who have lost everything. They are in shock and our community is a hub of activity because there is a loss and people want to help.

We all feel better when we help but sometimes we do not think about the person who is receiving it. Do they need another casserole? Do they need clothes that I was going to give away or perhaps would they like to go and buy their own pair of socks? Oftentimes give without thinking about the recipient. We want to distribute our love and fill their closets but they don’t have a closet, just yet.

My life prior to nonprofits was in the software business, more specifically distribution. My job was to make sure that the software was sold into the distributors, who would then sell it to the stores and the consumer would buy it. Nonprofits work much the same way when you think about it. We are distributors of good, not necessarily goods. The nonprofit makes sure the consumer gets the product that they need. An important role for sure.

In a time of tragedy there is a time and place for many nonprofits to step in and help. However, if we can go directly to our families rather than through distribution, in this situation, I think it is more impactful. These families need cash and gift cards plain and simple. They will still need to pay their mortgage and find a place to live and pay rent. There will be a gap before insurance payments can be processed. Families will need socks, toiletries that they want to pick out because they like their shampoo and they will need money to do that.

For the first time, I am urging people to go direct to a Go Fund Me if you can. If you know someone who knows someone think about supporting these families directly. If you don’t and want to reach out I am happy to direct you to a few. Realize that like a death, the grief process is long and slow and everyone will need support more than just in the first two weeks. Support is sometimes a call, a text, a walk, a dinner invitation in your home.

While the casserole is lovely, it is when the silence sets in, in these coming months and years ahead that the need will be the greatest. Yes, give now and jump in but please, please do not forget these people the way we have forgotten about those in Maui and North Carolina. We need to continue walking with our own communities for the long haul because that is the journey ahead.

So many have asked for local resources to give and I wanted to share a few here. Please do not hesitate to reach out if I can direct you to a family in need or a school that is trying to support their students. Loyola High School at current count has 100 students without homes. Mayfield Jr. School has 21 families and Mayfield Senior has a large number of families who lost everything and these are just a few communities trying to support their own.

Nonprofits to support the LA/Altadena WildFires:

LA Regional Food Bank– The Food Bank is distributing food to many of the nonprofits on the ground and families in need. I have also set up a fundraiser for the LA Food Bank on the Charity Matters Instagram Account @CharityMatters or please go direct.

Baby2Baby–  This wonderful nonprofit is assisting with diapers, formula and all things families and children need when all is gone. They do amazing work and so far have distributed over 1.5 million emergency supplies to children impacted by the fires.

World Central Kitchen– I have seen Chef Jose Andres at the Pasadena Convention Center feeding fire fighters and people who are evacuated there. When there is a catastrophe anywhere in the world he is there to feed people and support. Chef Andres just recently received the Presidential Medal of Freedom, a well deserved recognition.

California Fire Foundation– The Cal Fire Foundation supports firefighters, their families and the communities effected by fire. They are currently distributing $250 gift cards to families that lost everything.

Pasadena Humane Society– We had over 350 animals arrive the first night to the Pasadena Humane Society with burned paws and singed all over from fire. They need donations and have been overwhelmed with volunteers. The Humane Society is also looking for families to take in animals and foster them until their parents are found or in a place that allows pets.

Thank you all for the outpouring of love for our community. While this has been the worst of times, it has also been the best of times. Each act of kindness shows us the best of humanity. People are good, generous and kind. We are so grateful for all of the love you are sending our way to distribute.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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The Choice and Power of Connection

As 2024 ended and the madness of the holidays ensued, a few great things happened that had me thinking about the power of connection. As a result, connection is my word for 2025. I was reflecting back on 2024 and realized that much of last year was spent in isolation. Writing is such an incredible journey but it is also a lonely one. In 2024, I spent seven months writing Change for Good: The Transformative Power of Giving as the Ultimate Cure. While I wasn’t alone on an island, it often felt like I was. It was a choice.

When we set off to achieve goals, we take time from one place to add it to another. We make choices. The goal was to write a bestselling book, by putting all of these stories in one place, inspiring others to serve. The choice last year was to write every night. The result was a bestselling book and trust me I have no regrets. The consequence of that choice was less time with those I love in real connection. We all make choices with our goals but sometimes those choices have unforeseen consequences. This year the choice is for real connection.

Years ago my husband and I were on a cruise and an announcement came over the loud speaker announcing the days’ activities in a crisp British accent. The percer said, “Are you connected but not connected? Join us for today’s conversation about how to be more connected.” We did not attend the workshop but spent much of our time in the proceeding days looking at couples staring at their phones and not into each others eyes and deciding that they were CBNC-Connected but Not connected. Something we still observe years later.

This past year I was CBNC. I was connected to hundreds of people with schools I work with, nonprofit founders interviewed, my writers group but all via zoom. Most of my days were spent on back to back zooms and my in person meetings dwindled with the convenience and of course LA traffic. That was a choice, to make life easier and save time and not to meet in person. The consequence of that choice was a lack of real connection. Connected but not connected.

To be my own devils advocate, I also made some incredible new connections because of Zoom, LinkedIn and mutual friends that were amazing. I had a lovely group of women from Connecticut called The Good News Girls reach out and ask me to speak about the book. The founders, Susan and Mimi shown above, are two remarkable women who have created a community both online and in person where they are having important monthly conversations about community, connection and making a difference. They have found the sweet spot of both technology and in person. These amazing women really got me thinking about the power of connection and what they are building should be replicated and or expanded, it is fantastic!

A week before the holidays, I was scrolling and came upon a site called You are a Philanthropist. I was instantly intrigued and so I reached out via instagram direct message, something I never do! As a result, the amazing Jenn Klein and I connected and had a lovely conversation. Spoiler alert: You will get to know her in an upcoming interview. I made a new connection with a kindred spirit simply by reaching out.

The week after Christmas, I came across a post on LinkedIn where Jay Frost, a highly regarded rock star in the philanthropic world, was asking about who has written the next great book on giving? To my shock, my name and book were listed and recommended by none other than my new friend, Jenn Klein. The next thing I new I was having a conversation with the delightful and charming Jay Frost. The power connection.

The knife cuts both ways. We can create connection when we reach out. Technology is not always the enemy. The trick is navigating the balance. That is my challenge to myself in 2025. To create authentic connections like I did with Jenn and then find a way to use those authentic and real connections to connect in person. Or to try and find a balance when the zoom schedule is overloaded to meet up with friends.

While I don’t have the answer, I do know that this year I am reaching out and setting up in person dinners, coffees, visits with those that fill my cup, make me laugh and inspire me to be a better person. The choice is real. The power of connection is what creates community. Strong connections create strong communities. Strong communities create strong cities, states and countries. It all starts with us, our choices and the power of connection.

 

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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New Years is a time for change

Happy New Year! This is one of my favorite times of year. The pace of life slows to a crawl as we all recover from the holidays. We take a moment to just be and we begin to reflect on the year behind us and the one ahead. It is this magical place in time that does not rush. While the days are darker and shorter they are not hurried, they are slower. Which is exactly what we need as  we walk the bridge between past, present and future.

In order to move our lives ahead, we must take some time to look in the rear view mirror and see what we accomplished in 2024. What did you love about last year? What were those moments that brought you the most joy and why? Where did you go and who did you meet that made your heart full?  So often we are rushing through each day checking off our list that we miss those moments of joy right in front of us. Did you miss any or did you catch them all?

My husband says that I talk about death a little too often. If death has ever knocked at your door or someone you love you realize how short and precious our lives are. We have so little time to do what we really want to do on this earth. My philosophy is that we need to reverse engineer our lives, work from our funeral backwards. No, this isn’t morbid, hear me out. At our funeral what do we want people to talk about? How rich we were? How thin we were? NO, we want people to talk about how we lived and how we loved. We want to be remembered for how we treated others and made them feel. How we brought joy and kindness to each place we entered. Why? Because these are the things that truly matter.

As we take a moment to think about what we want this New Year to look like, let’s think about what matters to us most. How are we spending our time and with who? Do we adore our family and our aging parents, then let’s schedule those trips. My sister and I have decided to take our dad on monthly field trips this year. It could be just to a museum or to visit an old friend. We have made time with my dad and making those memories our priority. What are your priorities and who?

It is so easy to make a list of New Year’s resolutions but this year lets go a little deeper. Think about this day in 2026 and what do you want to see in your rearview mirror? What will you be thrilled that you accomplished? The real question to ask yourself is how do I want to define my year?

We all have a love and hate relationship with change. We love change once it’s behind us and we fear any change that is ahead. So start looking back and dream and what you want to see. Then look ahead and get that calendar out and mark those dates. Those are the gifts you give yourself. You deserve them.

Let’s not focus on being thinner or richer this year, instead let’s focus on how we can change for good. We all have the power to change our lives and others for the better. This year seems like a great time to start doing that. Cheers to you and all the good ahead. Happy New Year!

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

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We Wish You a Merry Christmas

May Peace “be your gift at Christmas and your blessing all year through!”

 Author Unknown

So many gifts have come this year. New friends, moments of joy and celebration, new creations and a renewed sense of purpose. Each of you continues to be a gift of goodness as we work together to create change for good. This year year my gift for you this year is this sweet poem from Kay Hoffman:

The gifts I’d leave beneath your tree,
Aren’t those that you can touch or see,
No toys meant just for pointless play,
But gifts to bless you every day.

The gift of friendship is warm and true,
Is one that I would leave for you.
Good health and happiness and cheer
To keep you smiling through the year.

The gift of peace that comes from God,
With a prayer to guide each path you trod.
And when your heart has lost its song
The gift of hope to cheer you on.
These are the gifts I’d leave for you.

So may we, too, remember with thankful hearts the love that comes with each present we open and cherish the time with those that we love. Wishing you all the very merriest Christmas!

Charity Matters.

 

 

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.

Episode 81: Pave the Way

We have all heard of cause marketing. You know brands like Tom’s Shoes where you buy one pair and another pair goes to someone in need. Before such a thing even existed there was today’s guest, Joan Hornig. She didn’t believe in “using” kindness to sell something she believes that philanthropy is beautiful. So much so that she left her successful job in corporate finance to make a significant difference in the world and give it all away. She does that through her Foundation and business called Pave the Way.  A for profit business that gives one hundred percent of profits to nonprofits.

I was lucky to meet Joan in person last week in NYC and give this dynamic human a big hug. She is even more amazing in person! Our conversation  was beyond inspiring and to use Joan’s words it was a conversation of consequence. One I am thrilled to share. So please join us and you can hear for yourself why  Joan is beyond the real deal and you don’t need to see her  but simply hear her heart to know just how special she is.

Here are a few highlights from our conversation:

 

Charity Matters: Tell us a little about what Pave the Way Foundation and Pave the Way Jewelry  does?

Joan Hornig:  Pave the Way Jewelry and my foundation are really built on a concept called social enterprise, which I was very instrumental in actually creating almost 25 years ago. The idea behind that was it wasn’t just talk about doing good, what it really was about was making a seismic difference.

  I felt that women did a tremendous amount of volunteer work in the world. They devalued their time in part, although it was very valuable, but they didn’t put a dollar price on it. Nothing could be more valuable than a woman’s time and her time spent talking about what she cares about.  So I thought when someone would see a piece of jewelry on someone and they complimented that person wearing the jewelry. ” I liked your earrings.” That person could say, “Thank you. Do you know this supports children with autism?” And then the story would unfold that they were essentially advertising with their dollars what their values were, and they were having a conversation of consequence.

So to call it social enterprise is different. I ask every single person, when she or he makes a purchase or they make a purchase, what charity they want me to donate to in their honor? Then I donate 100% of my profit on that piece sold to the charity of the purchaser’s choice.

 I’m empowering them to have a conversation of consequence, to understand that they have money to use, and that when they walk out they are a billboard advertising who they are and who they care about. 

Charity Matters: Where did your philanthropy begin? 

Joan Hornig:  I grew up in a suburb of Cleveland, to parents  who didn’t have a tremendous amount of means. There were some hard times, and nonprofits stepped in some time. What my parents taught me was that what you’re worth is not what you have in the bank, but what you’re worth is what you do tomorrow.  I never felt less than when the other kids went off to camp. I felt that I could do anything with my time and that I could make a difference.

 I spent a lot of time in museums, because my mother said, “You shop with your eyes and you take home as much as you can.” I listen to music. “You you shop with your ears, you take it home.” But when other kids were going to camp, I decided to be a candy striper because we  couldn’t go to camp. So I went to downtown Cleveland and I was teaching inner city kids how to read.

One of the kids said to me, “You know, I get food when I come here. We don’t have enough food at home.” And I was 14 years old.  And I said, “Really?” So  I decided I would put on my candy striper uniform, and I spent months going door to door in neighborhoods, raising money. I was able to raise enough money for 80 families to have  a complete Thanksgiving dinner. I think that was the beginning.

“Charity Matters: What was the moment you knew you needed to act and start Pave the Way?

Joan Hornig: I was 20 years old, I was walking down the aisle getting married. I made two promises to myself. One was that I was going to be George’s wife and be the best I could be. And two, because of the privilege I had through my education and I knew I was going to have a big life, I promised myself that by the time I was 50, I was going to give back everything, 100% so, that is where it really began.

I would say that 911 was an important factor, and that is because I watched from my apartment the Trade Towers go down. I  wanted to do something that was one step better than combining Paul Newman with Paul in the wall and Oprah. What I wanted to do was create the jewelry. Pay people fairly, put them to work, grow their business. But say to you when you buy something of mine,” What charity do you want me to donate to in your honor?” And from day one, I have donated 100% of my profit on each piece sold to the charity of the purchaser’s choice. 

Charity Matters: What are your biggest challenges?

Joan Hornig:  I think that one of the biggest challenges was actually getting people to take me seriously. If you are doing anything associated with what is traditionally a man’s job people take you seriously. When you switch to something that might be fashion or jewelry, they think that what you’re doing isn’t necessarily important.  

This it’s not just about selling the jewelry. I have to design it. I have to make it. It’s not vertically integrated, right? To check it, I have to hire people, right? We have to do the accounting, we have to do the bookkeeping. And from day one, I decided that every single charity that I would donate to would be located in a place where other people could learn about it. So if you go to my site right click on all the different charities that I’ve given to local and national there are over 1000 and where you can leave my site and learn about those charities. So the challenge was people would say to me,” You’re not busy anymore.” I’d say I’m busier than I ever was. I’m working seven days a week. I said, “You’re not understanding.” So that was actually a challenge.

Charity Matters: What fuels you to keep doing this work?

Joan Hornig: Those moments really are the people I meet in the nonprofit sector. Those are the people. What they do is so extraordinary. It fuels me when I get invited into a food pantry and I see people who do service are so extraordinary. I don’t hold a candle to them and they are the people who are so inspiring.  They’re all over the world.  I know what they’re doing, and I know that it’s harder than what most people do.  

Charity Matters: Tell us what success you have had and what your impact has been? 

Joan Hornig: I measure impact several ways. One is if somebody hears the story of what I do and they tell somebody else, that’s impact.  All of a sudden, we started a conversation of consequence. I measure it when people say I’m going to give 5% or 10% on the business. Everyone cannot afford to give 100% right?  I’ve had an education and a great life but I don’t diminish any or anything anybody gives.

I do speaking tours sometimes, I was in Nashville, and a gentleman had sold his company. He was starting another one, and he decided he was going to follow my model, that’s impact. That’s a huge impact.  The impact is if someone who listens to this says, “I can do something.” Impact is defined in a context that matters, that is only relevant to what someone can do. When we have a community of people who use their muscle memory of giving and caring to pay it forward and inspire others. That’s impact.

Charity Matters: If you could dream any dream for your organization, what would that be?

Joan Hornig:  My dream has always been to collaborate. I like the idea of licensing fees that go to charity. I would love a fragrance company to come to me to collaborate to create a perfume. Can you imagine having something that’s called philanthropy lingers?

Most of all, what I want is institutions, retailers and everyone who sells my jewelry to understand that they should take the time to ask what their customers care about. Not tell them to care about something. That’s my dream. It is really about asking, because we learn a lot from other people when we listen.

Charity Matters: What life lessons have you learned from this experience?

Joan Hornig: I learned that everyone is interesting and worth my time. That your time is more valuable to you than my time is to you, and that I have to use it wisely. Actually, I feel we’re on the same team. If I respect what you care about and respect your efforts, we’re on the same team. You can feel it. 

Charity Matters: How has this journey changed you?

Joan Hornig:  I think that I am a more confident person because I’ve taken risks. I think that one of the things that I’ve learned is if something doesn’t work out, I can handle that risk of disappointment.  The way I make promises to myself and keep them, like the way I did when I was 20, and I walked the aisle and made those two promises. I keep all the things that I made that weren’t right, that didn’t work out. Then I go back to them a number of years later, and I learned that I can fix it. So I learned that sometimes you acquire  knowledge without even knowing it. 

What I want everyone to do is find themselves in a situation where they give one extra thing to someone that they don’t expect to give something to. That would be the way to find me in spirit this holiday season. I love to do one thing that takes a little extra effort that helps someone else.

 I really want people to understand how blessed we are. So many people can benefit, especially people we don’t know.  They’re not obligated, except to hopefully pay it forward in the future when they’re on their feet. So I believe in a hand up, not a handout.

CHARITY MATTERS.

 

YOUR REFERRAL IS THE GREATEST COMPLIMENT,  IF YOU ARE SO MOVED OR INSPIRED, WE WOULD LOVE YOU TO SHARE AND INSPIRE ANOTHER. If you enjoyed today’s episode, please connect with us:

Copyright © 2024 Charity Matters. This article may not be reproduced without explicit written permission; if you are not reading this in your newsreader, the site you are viewing is illegally infringing our copyright. We would be grateful if you contact us.