“In the end, though, maybe we must all give up trying to pay back the people in this world who sustain our lives. In the end, maybe it’s wiser to surrender before the miraculous scope of human generosity and to just keep saying thank you, forever and sincerely, for as long as we have voices.”
I honestly don’t think there is a single person on this planet who enjoys moving, at least I have never met one. This past week I flew to Texas to unpack my son and get him settled in his new college “home,” a process thousands of parents across the country are all getting ready to do. A messy chaotic time, but a rite of passage for sure, making sure our chicks our settled in their new nest.
Rather than stop with that move, I continued on across the country to help a very dear friend with a very big move. She is moving from the home she raised her children in and now that her nest is empty, she is simplifying. Since I recently went through this painful process, I realized I could actually be of service. More than that, I wanted to be there for her as she has been there for me, so many times.
While it seemed like an odd way to spend my vacation, it really wasn’t at all. Because at the end of our lives there is no possible way to express the joy and love that both my son and friend have given me. Both of these humans have enriched my lives in immeasurable ways and if serving them, in even the smallest of gestures, expresses an iota of my love…well then it was time well spent.
I’m sure all of you are as tired as I am, hearing about our move. Well, it happened yesterday and I’m sure I had written a fabulous post between the holidays and packing and I promise when I find it in one of these thousands of boxes, it will be up.
Until then, thank you all for your kindness and patience in the next few days ahead. Moving is never fun, especially this time of year. However, this New Year, we will start off in our new home. So cheers to new beginnings.
As Thanksgiving week begins, there is much to be thankful for this year. My sons are heading home from school mid-week, the house will be full of noise, chaos, friends and all that fills me up. There is simply nothing better than a noisy full house that is alive.
This year just as our house begins to fill in one area we will begin emptying in others. A process that for many, is cathartic, renewing and invigorating but for me has been difficult. My husband can rifle through a drawer never notice the saved birthday card, the tiny memento and in a moment have it all in a box. Yes, he wins on efficiency…
However, for me each drawer uncovers a memory, a moment, a special something and I find myself looking backwards at our life and all it has been. Where has it gone? How are our sons in college?Remembering how we were and filled with nostalgia.
I am reminded by many, that this is a process that most go through at some stage of life and I find myself wondering if it easy for everyone or this difficult? I know being sentimental does not and will not lend itself to our new mid-century zen home and that,”stuff” and memories are not the same. Yet, each item triggers another memory, another moment and a place in time that brings smiles and tears.
So, as the house fills with the noise and the chaos of the week, I am full of gratitude. We have been blessed with 3 amazing healthy sons, a life full of family, friends, fun and memories and a home that has anchored much of it. As the tears, roll down my cheeks and the house fills with noise I know that this is what matters and I am blessed.
As I mentioned, we recently put our house on the market. We have no plan but just threw it out to the universe because it simply seems like the right time with our second son leaving for college. While keeping beds made (with boys), the house picked up and clearing out for showings at a moments notice is no picnic, there has been an amazing transformation in our family in the last two weeks…..gratitude.
Every time we look at a potential nest for our clan, we hear “this room isn’t as nice as the one I have” or “our kitchen is better” and on it goes. Even my husband and I find ourselves at night, saying how much we love the old beautiful wood floors in our house and how blessed we feel to live in this very special place. While we have always loved our home, it is the twisted human condition, that you don’t appreciate what you have until its gone which has hit our household.
Perhaps, at the end of the day if we don’t find the “right” next stop and stay in our home, then maybe that’s the lesson in this journey. Afterall, I now know for a fact that my boys know how to make a bed, keep their room clean at all times and that they truly realize the blessings of home. If that is the end result of this process, with or without a moving truck, then I would have to say its a move more than worth taking.
As you know change has been a common thread in my life lately. Our oldest is unsure of his next step, our middle son deciding where he will attend college and our youngest getting ready to go to high school. As if that change isn’t enough, we have decided to move.
This decision has not come lightly or quickly but one that our family has pondered for sometime. Knowing that with an emptier nest we don’t need as much space as we once did, that our home is where our family is and some innate sense that it is simply time. Do we have a new nest? No. Do we know where we are headed? Not really. Is that scary? Yes.
The reality is that all change is scary because it is all about the unknown. What we know is safe and secure and what we don’t is terrifying. There is also something exhilarating about change that makes you feel alive, excited and looking ahead. What I do know for sure is that it feels like the right time, that while we have only moved twice, both times it was simply a feeling that inspired the move, and in hindsight those gut instincts were right for us.
So, as I ponder the unknown and where we might land, I through it out to the universe, God and all that is bigger than myself….knowing that change is growth and home is wherever my family is.